


Glasses

by ALittleBirdieToldMeASecret



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: ???? - Freeform, Blood, Bodily Fluids, F/F, Family Angst, Gaster Papyrus (Undertale), Gen, I don’t know how to tag for description of vomiting basically, Occasional violence, Sickness, but does it count if it’s magic?, so uh just know that’s in there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2020-02-04 11:30:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 61,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18603649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALittleBirdieToldMeASecret/pseuds/ALittleBirdieToldMeASecret
Summary: Sans doesn’t remember why, but he hates it when Papyrus wears glasses.  And he’s not the only one.





	1. Intervention

“ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS??”

Frisk nodded their head excitedly, but with each glance back into the mirror, he felt more uncomfortable.Maybe circular frames just weren’t for him.

“I’M...NOT SURE ABOUT THESE ONES.I MEAN,” he took them off his face, setting them back on the table, “I’M SURE I LOOKED ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS, BUT MAYBE A DIFFERENT FRAME WOULD BE...MORE SUITED TO SOMEONE AS COOL AS THE GREAT PAPYRUS!!”

They seemed to contemplate something for a moment, looking back over his face before picking up a different pair and handing them off.

“THESE??THEY LOOK A BIT...” small, bland, boring, but Frisk looked determined, “ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT.”

Placing the black, rectangular glasses carefully where they would sit, he held one stem to keep them up while he looked himself over.

Much to his surprise, they were quite complimentary.Perfect match, actually.It looked...right.

“WOWWIE!! YOU DID IT, FRISK!! THEY’RE PERFECT!!!”

Raising their hands high in celebration, he set the glasses down to pick them up, spinning gleefully before sitting them back on their chair.

The doctor returned to the room, pleased by the selection, and assured them the glasses would arrive within the week.

Hand in hand, the human guided the lanky skeleton out of the optometrist’s, following the long sidewalks back to the edge of the city.He had asked if Alphys couldn’t have just done it, but they signed him that she wasn’t that kind of a Doctor.Which seemed silly, being that she was smart enough to have probably done it anyway.

After Frisk had figured out his sight problem, even after he explained to them that Sans acted really oddly around him when he wore glasses, they told Undyne, resulting in them both hounding him to get them.Undyne had said she wanted to fight him ‘without a handicap’, even after he reassured her that he knew it wouldn’t be any different.

Either way, it was a nice excuse to spend time with the human Frisk.They stopped for nice cream on the way back in to their neighborhood, where Frisk asked when the last time he’d worn glasses was.

“OH, HMMM, IT HAS BEEN QUITE SOME TIME!!I WAS STILL PRACTICALLY A BABYBONES!!”

Frisk smiled excitedly up at him, extending the treat in a way to ask him to hold it.They quickly signed ‘Maybe Sans will like them now!”

Replacing the pop in one hand and his hand in their other, the thought was certainly a pleasant one.

“YOU MAKE AN EXCELLENT POINT!!YOU ARE QUITE BRILLIANT, MY HUMAN FRIEND!!!”

Swinging his hand in joy, they continued on to the house he shared with his brother, in no particular hurry to get there. 

 

 

“BROTHER!!! WE HAVE RETURNED!!”His call echoed through the house, despite Sans very visibly sitting at the table to the right of the entryway.It was a nice house, very much like the one underground, but it was white on the inside, and contained oddly shiny wood floors.

As they neared the dining room, they found Toriel, sat across from his brother, who’d ‘accidentally’ arrived a bit early, enjoying a cup of tea, and no doubt terrible comedy his brother served with it.

“Hello, you two, how was your trip?”

“THE MOST FANTASTIC, OBVIOUSLY!!!”  He embellished his words with a gesture of his hand, while Frisk approached her with with theirs, fast flying.He only caught a glimpse of ‘very good’ and ‘cool’ as he drew his attention to his brother.

“AND YOU PRESUMABLY DID NOT DO MUCH!!”He stated, examining the already messy house around them, “HOW MANY TIMES MUST I INSIST THAT YOU PICK UP YOUR WRETCHED SOCKS???”The nightmare ensued, even on the surface.

“sock, bro, s’only one.”

“SANS!!!”

The gentle laughter from behind him stole his attention back, “I MUST APOLOGIZE FOR MY BROTHER’S COMPLETE AND TOTAL LACK OF EFFORT AND ABSOLUTE LAZINESS!HOWEVER,” he clasped his hands together with a slight bow, “IT IS GETTING QUITE LATE, AND I MUST,” his eyes lit up with an idea, cutting himself off, “WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOR DINNER???”

“Oh!Um,” Toriel looked bashfully downwards, “that’s a lovely offer, Papyrus, but-“ tugging at her sleeve, Frisk smiled sweetly up at her, signing ‘you could help him’.

Sighing, she shared a brief (was that knowing?) smile with Sans before looking back to him.

“If it’s not too much trouble.Would you like a hand?”

“WOWWIE!!!SANS NEVER HELPS WITH THE COOKING!!THE GREAT PAPYRUS ACCEPTS YOUR GRACIOUS OFFER!!”

He continued as Toriel got up to follow him towards the kitchen, “I WOULD ALSO BE MOST HAPPY TO TEACH YOU SOME OF MY PROFOUND COOKING WISDOM!!! NYEH HEH HEH!!”

——

As they disappeared into the other room, Frisk happily sat across the table from Sans.

“so, kid, patella me what you two were up to, today.”

Shaking their head, they signed back ‘surprise’, smiling face never faltering.

“heh.a surprise, huh?”He looked into the kitchen, lowering his voice, “better be a good one.”

It had been almost three years, but he still didn’t trust them.The human had decided to stop resetting after several failed attempts to save Asriel.He would always disappear after they collapsed the barrier.They would admit to a few killings, just to see what they could change by behaving differently, but they had never hurt Papyrus.And it’s certainly not like they had enjoyed it.But they could still understand, he only wanted to protect his brother.

Signing back ‘it is’, they decided to see if they could join Toriel and Papyrus, rather than getting silently judged by Mr. Obvious.

 

——

 

Not too long after they got started, Frisk came in to add an extra pair of hands.Toriel had already explained his recipe was too advanced for her, and offered a simpler one in its place.It still had spaghetti in it, so he didn’t mind.

They had made far less of a mess than he was used to, but it had taken about half the time as well.Even Sans wandered in to see what all they were up to.

Frisk turned on the radio and before they knew it, dinner had come and gone and it was dark outside.A bright kind of dark, more welcome than the perpetual darkness of the underground.

  It was still so amazing, positively awe-inspiring; the sun and the moon and the stars - oh the stars!!! - and the humans.Not everyone was nice but so many were.He’d even decided to go to college some day!What a wonderful place...

Frisk had fallen asleep on the couch while they sat around the table and talked and laughed (well, he mostly groaned at the terrible jokes), but it was nice.It was...family.He loved his brother dearly, but there had always been...something.Something missing.He couldn’t place it, even now, but everyone filled the gap so well it was almost gone.

Toriel eventually decided that they should ‘get going’, even though Papyrus happily offered them to stay, she thanked him for everything before picking up Frisk without disturbing them, and kissing both their foreheads as she left.

They only lived a few blocks away, so they usually walked.Papyrus stood on the porch and watched them away, returning when it felt appropriate.

Most monsters still lived in the ‘monster sanctioned neighborhoods’ but they were slowly becoming more integrated with humans.They even had human neighbors!But that didn’t mean there weren’t still threats looming...

He found his brother already unconscious on the couch and decided to throw a blanket over him before heading upstairs to his own bed.It had to be fairly late, but he didn’t feel tired!Still buzzing happily from such a lovely day.Yet, after putting on his pajamas and brushing his teeth, the moment he laid down, he fell into a deep and peaceful sleep.


	2. Despite Everything, It’s Still You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> =)

  His brother never checked the mail, ever, so he wasn’t overly worried about ruining his little surprise.  This didn’t stop him from rushing out to meet the mailman every day he delivered, well, usually just junk mail.  He was a particularly pleasant human, who was visibly glad to finally be able to present him with his eagerly awaited package.

However, the postman was definitely caught off guard by the hug it earned him.Waving him off before bounding back inside, he tossed the rest of the mail on the hall tree as he sped past towards the stairs.His brother hadn’t even had the chance to harass him with a ‘joke’ before he was gone like a flash.

Once in the privacy of his room, he disassembled the small box easily, fumbling slightly with the added plastic pillows securing the small case holding them.His eyes widened as he revealed the delicate glasses slowly, awarding them a dramatic entrance into his life.

He’d already taken the small roll of transparent tape Sans kept in his ‘office’ a few days prior, precisely setting the glasses in the best position before applying it just so.

Taking a deep breath, he looked into the mirror on the back of his door, ecstatic to find they rested symmetrically, complimenting his features oh so perfectly.

Prepared to tear back downstairs, he hesitated.A special occasion called for a special outfit!!Sifting through his closet and dresser, he decided on a nice pair of cuffed black slacks, matched with  the light-weather, lilac turtleneck that Toriel had made him several months ago.This would be its first debut, one it deserved.

Giving his reflection a once over, he felt a jolt of excitement that he just couldn’t contain any longer.Hopping back down the stairs, he paused just around the bend before the dining room, where Sans now sat, looking through the mail he’d brought in earlier.

“SANS!!I MUST INFORM YOU THAT I LOOK ESPECIALLY DASHING ON THIS DAY!”

“you kiddin’ me, bro?you look  _radius_  every day.”

He completely let that one slide as he swiftly slipped around the bend. _Wowie_ , _everything’s_ _so_ _clear!!!_

“WHAT DO YOU THINK, BROTHER??QUITE DISTINGUISHED, NO?”

He did his best to strike the pose of an intellectual, awaiting praise.

Only silence greeted him.

Opening one eye, he saw his brother in perfect detail, frozen to his seat, rigid, eye lights completely missing.

“SANS?OH!I LOOK SO AMAZING, YOU’RE LOST FOR WORDS!!!NYEH HEH HEH!!!”

He stood prouder still.His brother actually looked like he might be sick.He’d probably just eaten something he’d left in the fridge too long.Still...

“VERY WELL, I SUPPOSE I AM JUST TOO MUCH TO PROCESS RIGHT NOW!!”Sans’ mouth twitched slightly, practically unseeable as he twisted back to the mail, purposefully blocking him from view.

“y-yeah...that’s it, bro...”

“...WELL, I TOLD FRISK I’D SHOW THEM AS SOON AS THEY ARRIVED,” he suddenly felt unwelcome, a very unpleasant thing to feel in his own home, “SO NOW I MUST AWAIT THEIR ARRIVAL HOME FROM SCHOOL!!!”

He waited for a goodbye, but one wouldn’t come.A chill swept over him as he quickly stumbled to strap his shoes on and get out of the house.His legs felt stiff as he stood on the porch for a moment, not sure where to go.Surely Ms. Toriel would not mind if he were to offer some help around the house while they awaited Frisk’s return...

Swallowing the nerves threatening to choke him, he returned to a brisk pace, headed down the sidewalks in a way that he didn’t even have to think about anymore.He thoughtlessly found his hand on one side of the glasses, toying with the stem in thought.Realizing what he was doing, he looked up, and-

He stopped.

The houses, the trees.The leaves and the flowers.The monsters and humans all around.Everything was so BEAUTIFUL.He found his breath stuck in his throat, turning in a circle...it was too much to take in at once.Tears of pure joy welled up in his eyes.And he was running.He could not WAIT to see Ms. Toriel!She was so pretty without glasses!! And the human?Oh boy!!!

The previous weight on his shoulders was gone and forgotten in a matter of seconds. _This_ _is_ _most_ _certainly_ _the_ _best_ _thing_ _the_ _human_ _has_ _ever_ _accomplished!!_

————

  Huffing as he slowed to a stop in front of the delightfully pastel yellow house, that had to have been record time.Trotting the rest of the way to the door, he knocked politely before waiting for an answer.The door swung open not two minutes later, a welcome smile greeting him.

“Oh!Hello, Papyrus,” somehow, she was still prettier than he expected, “are those the new glasses?”

He nodded furiously before she began leading him inside.

“They suit you perfectly.”The warmth was very welcome, but it awkwardly emphasized the icy response from his brother.

“THANK YOU, MS. TORIEL!!YOU ARE EVEN PRETTIER THAN I REALIZED!!AND SO AM I!NYEH HEH HEH!!”

Giggling as she stepped into the kitchen, she glanced back at him, “And I’m glad to see you’re enjoying your sweater.Would you like some tea?”She’d already started the water, now she stood beside the cabinet with the dishes stacked neatly inside, much more orderly than their house.

“OH, YES, PLEASE!!”He was beaming, so tickled by all the new things he’d never noticed.She pulled two cups and accompanying trays out.Each cup had DIFFERENT flowers on it!!How lovely!The lace on the curtain above the window behind her was so intricate, he was draw to it like a moth to flame.

The kettle sounded far away as he touched the fabric softly with his fingers, when his focus shifted to the backyard outside of the window.

His soul pulse was rising as the flowers looked back at him, looking like porcelain, reflecting the light in a way that made them appear to be made from velvet.It took Toriel three attempts at his name to recapture his attention.

“OH!HOW RUDE OF ME!! THE GREAT PAPYRUS STRIVES TO BE ATTENTIVE!!”

“Papyrus, dear, is everything alright?” 

“YES!!MOST ABSOLUTELY!!!”

Her smile was slanted as he looked back to her, brows furrowed enough to confuse him.He flicked his finger up, like he’d had an idea, but realized he hadn’t heard her first question.

“MY APOLOGIES, IT APPEARS AS THOUGH MY ASTOUNDING VISION HAS LEFT MY OTHER SENSES...AT A SLIGHT DISADVANTAGE!”

  Her smile recovered, “Of course.It’s quite a lot to take in.”She set the cups at the table on the other side of the room, “I hadn’t realized your vision had been so...hampered.I would have never guessed!”She set two small dishes of sugar and milk between them.

“NYEH HEH!!THAT IS BECAUSE I HAD ADAPTED!!!JUST IMAGINE THE LEVELS OF GREATNESS I CAN OBTAIN NOW!!!!”He marched across the small room to pull a seat out for Toriel who thanked him as he took his place across from her.

“I’m sure Frisk will be so happy to learn how much you love them.”She adjusted her tea to her liking as she continued, “It must be a shock for Sans to see his younger brother looking so mature and scientific.”

His smile faltered, but she hadn’t noticed.

“OH YES!! HE WAS...PRACTICALLY SPEECHLESS WHEN I LEFT!”

She hummed peacefully, stirring her tea as she looked back to him.She looked...proud.It touched him, but there was an edge to it, for some reason.He was suddenly feeling quite vulnerable.He blushed as he stirred his tea, despite the lack of additions, before he took a sip.

Her eyes stayed on him as he toyed with his cup, her smile playful, but kind.

“Would you like to see them?The flowers?”

Almost bringing the table with him, he jumped to his feet.

“YES!!!!”

She laughed as she stood, following him much more slowly as he raced to the back door, taking the four steps down in one, finding himself at a loss for where to start.They were all so...so colorful!! So delicate!!! So-!!!!!!!He couldn’t contain a shrill whine of excitement as he rushed to the furthest ones, lining the fence in the back.He collapsed onto his knees, drinking in every vein and crease of each petal and leaf.

Bright pinks and blues and oranges, every different shade of green imaginable.  So crisp! He had to close his eyes for reprieve from the overwhelming joy of it all.

The tears didn’t stop this time though, he felt the droplets stain his face as they rolled deftly down, eventually heavy enough to fall into the plush grass.

Why did it feel like he’d never really been on the surface until now?

Everything felt so much more  _real_.It wasn’t just his sight, he could  _feel_ everything  better,  _smell_ so  much more clearly,  even _hear_  the wind blowing ever so softly.

It wasn’t until he heard the chorus of children’s voices that he was snapped out of his blissful daze.It had to be the school bus!!Toriel had noticed as well, glancing over her shoulder, turning back to the skeleton who had practically teleported before her.

She seemed startled, but only for a second as it melted back into a smile.

“That must be Frisk, would you like to meet them at the door?”

He nodded as she turned to let him pass, making his way back to the front, just in time to open it for them.

As soon as they realized, they threw their hands into the air, bracing for the hug/thrill ride as he pulled them joyously into an embrace.

“HUMAN FRISK!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING UP WITH THIS MAGNIFICENT IDEA!!!!”He held them at arms length to give them the chance to sign their response.

‘They look amazing on you!’

“YES, I KNOW!!! NYEH HEH HEH!!”

‘Does Sans like them?’

The flicker of uncertainty that crossed his face was enough of an answer.

‘Oh.Sorry.’

“WORRY NOT, HUMAN FRISK, I AM SURE HE WILL COME AROUND!!!”

He set them down as Toriel caught up, allowing them to hug her as well.The three of them headed into the living room, Frisk tossing their backpack beside the table, plopping contentedly next to it on the floor. 

Following suit, he sat beside them, while Toriel sat across from them on the couch.She asked Frisk about their day as they began pulling out their books and folders, signing statements and answers in between.

They had very little homework, that both her and Papyrus could help with, and as soon as it was done, they were on their feet, asking if they could go out with Papyrus for a little bit.Toriel laughed and told them that was perfectly alright with her but they’d have to ask him, which he dubiously obliged.

Frisk didn’t even mind him stopping every other step to point out something new, or pick something up.He’d found a rock with holes in it!!Like a little tiny meteor!!!

Their walk was aimless, but they found themselves at the park around sunset.Climbing up the steepest hill they could find, they sat and watched the sun bleed into the clouds, blurring blues with reds and pinks with greens.It lit up more vibrantly than any magic he’d ever seen, painting each cloud with an array of hues.It was like feeling every emotion at once. 

After a while, Frisk climbed into his lap, looking up to him with the softest smile he’d ever seen.It felt...like an apology.But he blinked the thoughts away as he hugged them closer, watching the colors fade and blur to blues and greys.

Just as the first stars freckled the sky, Frisk’s phone rang out, a familiar song to alert her that Toriel had sent them a text.They tapped something back quickly before looking back up to him.He nodded, getting to his feet, Frisk clutching tightly to his side as he carried them back down.

They walked back in silence, Frisk holding his hand, occasionally pausing to point out constellations.He finally understood why they were called those things!!And they were back home soon enough.

Hugging them goodnight in the entry way, he let them scamper upstairs to prepare for bed.

After a brief silence, Toriel placed a compassionate hand on his shoulder.

“If I’m not being too forward, Papyrus, something seems to be bothering you.”

Taken aback, he could only look to her for a moment before gathering his composure.

“NO!!NOT AT ALL!I AM PERFECTLY AS TOGETHER AS ALWAYS!!!”He grinned as sincerely as he could, genuinely grateful for her concern...but he couldn’t very well tell her that Sans wouldn’t speak to him when he wore glasses.That would sound ridiculous!!

She watched him for another moment before conceding.

“Very well.But if you’d like to talk, I am always here.”

He thanked her with his usual enthusiasm as she kissed his forehead before he whisked back out into the slowing neighborhood.

Looking down at his phone, the screen read 8:49.He hadn’t realized it was so late!Waving one last goodbye over his shoulder, Toriel’s silhouette in the doorway responded in kind, setting him off on the walk back to his house.

Back to Sans.

With each turn, with every crosswalk, he found himself slowing.He was certainly in no hurry to get home.He gave himself excuses to drag it out, examining the street lights, reading and rereading a poster for a concert that had been stapled to a telephone pole.Waving at a familiar monster enjoying the evening from their porch.

It had taken twice as long as usual, but it still didn’t feel like long enough as he stood in front of the house where he lived with his brother.It felt like a stranger’s house.

Gathering his courage, he made his way up the pathway to the door, making each step onto the porch more quiet than the last, until he was at the front door.He hadn’t meant to hold his breath, but already was as he pushed the door’s handle to make it open.

Centimeter by centimeter, it was eventually open enough for him to slip inside.It was mostly dark, besides the light above the sink in the kitchen, and the light from the tv in the living room.Not bothering with his shoes, he crept past each room and to the stairs, suddenly finding a panic to fuel his flight up them, throwing himself into his room like a prisoner making his great escape.

Taking a deep breath, he moved away from the door.His mind felt like white noise.Why was he afraid of his brother’s dumb problem with glasses?

Trying to shake the thoughts away, he caught another glance of himself in the mirror.‘Mature and....scientific?’What had Ms. Toriel meant by that?He looked like a scientist?

He stared back at his reflection, finding only himself.

  Why did he feel so guilty?

Resigning himself to the negative feelings, he slowly pulled his pants off, followed by his sweater.The tape wasn’t sturdy enough to keep the glasses on, coming off with the top, but he carefully plucked them from the clothing and placed them in their rightful case.

He knew exactly which drawer his pajamas were in, but once he was finished putting them on, he realized he’d have to go back into the house to brush his teeth.

He stood in front of his door for several minutes, until a knock startled him out of his haze.

“hey, uh, bro?i heard you comin’ in...can we talk?”

He contemplated seeing if he could make it to his bed and pretend to be asleep without him knowing, but he knew that his brother knew he would never purposefully go to bed without brushing his teeth.

_Curse_ _my_ _fastidious_   _self_ _care habits!_

He creaked the door open, smiling down at the once again undefined skeleton waiting anxiously in the hallway.

“GOOD EVENING, BROTHER!I WAS ACTUALLY JUST ABOUT TO GO TO SLEEP, WOULD YOU-“

He pushed the door open slightly more, forcing Papyrus to step back.

“paps, c’mon, just let me talk for a minute.”

The smile couldn’t sustain itself any longer as it fell into a worried frown.

“ALRIGHT, BUT PLEASE KEEP IT QUICK!I HAVE A ROUTINE TO UPHOLD!!”

Practically ignoring him, the older monster walked to his bed, taking a seat and waiting for him to follow.Sheepishly, he sat beside him, goofy smile returning, but far less convincing under his furrowed brows.

“pap...i gotta be honest with you.”He looked away with a sigh before continuing.  He’d probably spent all day trying to think of what to say, “when you wear those things, it...reminds me a lot of someone...”

“SANS-“

He held up a hand, closing his eyes until he opened them, focus back on him.

“but s’not fair to make it hard for you to see just because of a stupid memory.”

“WERE THEY A SCIENTIST?”

His brother looked like he’d had acid thrown in his face, “wha-“

“MS. TORIEL SAID I LOOKED SCIENTIFIC, WHICH FELT ODD GIVEN THAT YOU’RE THE SCIENTIFIC ONE.”He paused.“WHEN YOU’RE NOT BEING SUPREMELY LAZY.”

He let out a shaky laugh that sounded more like a cough as he tried to retain his cool demeanor.

“k-kinda...not really.don’t...don’t think about it anymore, okay?”

The knot in his stomach was growing looser, a more sincere smile blossoming onto his face.

“DOES THIS MEAN I CAN KEEP THEM???”

Sans had managed to get some composure back, but not without breaking a sweat.

“...yeah, bro.but, uh, don’t mention this to anyone, okay?”

“YES!!UNDERSTOOD!NONE ARE BETTER AT KEEPING SECRETS THAN THE GREAT PAPYRUS!!”He thrust his pointer finger towards the ceiling, laugh resonating throughout the house.His brother let out a long sigh as he got back to his feet.

“yeah, you’re right.” He stopped at the door on his way out, “night, bro.”

“GOODNIGHT, BROTHER!!”

The weight that their conversation had lifted made him feel like he was floating.The rest of the night passed in a instant up until he found himself back in bed, surprisingly exhausted from the rollercoaster of a day.

Tomorrow would be better.He could see AND have his brother, it felt fantastic.His brother had been so much more open with him since they’d arrived on the surface...everything was just getting better and better.

He fell asleep with happy thoughts and a smile to match.Tomorrow would be better.


	3. A Bird In The Hand

A sweet smell greeted him as his eyes cracked open.Light flooded the room from the window, casting long shadows and golden light over everything it touched.What a scenic view to wake up to every day.Even the cloudy days were nice, tinting everything with a soft glow. 

He’d actually already been up for a few hours, but he usually squeezed in another nap before the sun came up, if even just to wake up to this.

Sitting up, he found his curiosity peaked.It smelled like the days of when they’d first arrived to the surface.All of the monsters had ended up having to share a few empty houses on the edge of town.Frisk rounded their closest friends and adopted goat parents into the smallest one, and while they had to sleep on the floors, it was so much fun!!!Like a sleepover for almost a month straight!!He would help Ms. Toriel make breakfast, usually pancakes, and they would eat together, like a family!!

He was entirely happy now, but that had to be the most fun he’d had it a long time!His thoughts lingered on his friends, playing back happy memories and holiday parties.Save for the protests on tv, and occasional egging of houses, the surface really turned out to be even greater than he’d expected!!

Rubbing an eye socket as he yawned, he stretched upwards, finally pulling himself out of his comfortable bed.He decided on his cropped pink hoodie with white stars paired with black high-waisted jeans.Putting on his clothes for the day was easy, but it took a couple of minutes to get his glasses right before he deemed himself acceptable to head downstairs.

His steps slowed as he approached the kitchen.The sight inside was one to cherish.It was rare for Sans to cook, let alone be up in time for breakfast.He lingered in the doorway, watching his brother flip a couple of pancakes before turning the page on a book speckled with batter.He felt giddy that he could practically read the instructions from there.

“GOOD MORNING, SANS.”

His brother started, glancing over his shoulder with a nervous smile.

“morning, bro.”

He walked over, reaching into the cabinet beside the stove, retrieving a half-used bag of powdered sugar. 

“MAY I ASSIST YOU, BROTHER?”

His eyes remained focused on the griddle pan, “yeah, sure.”

Setting the sugar down on the counter beside his brother, he began searching the refrigerator for the orange juice.It took a moment to find the vanilla extract, which he spotted like a hawk.It was ironically already on the counter (just hidden behind the cinnamon), and now all he needed was a bowl.

Measuring and mixing and humming and adjusting.Their eyes caught each other’s, giving him the opportunity to smile at his brother, who returned it, following it up with a nudge from his elbow.

“that looks pretty good, paps, maybe your forte is baking.”

“I DO QUITE ENJOY HELPING MS. TORIEL WITH HER PIES!”Testing the consistency of the glaze, he deemed it finished, “BUT OVEN FIRES ALSO APPEAR TO BE MY FORTE.”

Chuckling, his brother poured the last of the batter into a smiley face, much like his own, “you’re not wrong about that.”

Gathering the plates and silverware, he started setting the table while his brother finished the pancakes and carried them over.

“already made some coffee, if you want some,” the sleepy skeleton made his way to the coffee pot on the other end of the counter, “even though i know it’s not exactly your  cup’a tea .”

“YOU KNOW, COFFEE IS REALLY JUST BEAN TEA.”

The shatter of porcelain rang out, catching him by surprise.

“SANS, ARE YOU ALRIGHT??”

Spinning around to face his brother’s back, he found him stiff, shrapnel from his mug littering the floor in front of him.

“yeah, heh, sorry about that.”

It took a very uncomfortable minute for him to fetch the dust pan out from under the sink.He was definitely not alright.

Papyrus had already knelt down to collect the larger pieces by the time his brother settled across from him, gathering the splinters and such.

“you don’t have to do that, bro.”

“NONSENSE!!WHO WOULD I BE IF I DIDN’T HELP MY BROTHER WHEN HE NEEDED IT!!”

Overly focused on the floor and glass, the only response he got was a strained laugh.

His attention faded from his brother as he brought a piece of the mug closer to his face.There were so many little tiny divots and crags, like a tiny little mountain range.How had he gone his whole life without being able to marvel at such intricacies?

A gentle hand on his lowered it, letting his brother recapture his focus.

“...papyrus?”

A goofy smile found its place stretching across his face.Pushing the shard towards him, he practically beamed.

“IT’S LIKE A TINY MOUNTAIN RANGE, SANS!!”

Earning himself a more genuine laugh from his brother, he felt the tension ease back, taking the opportunity to help his brother finish before breakfast was cold.

After washing their hands, Sans took a seat while his brother poured two cups of coffee.Setting one gently beside him as he ambled past to his seat, they could finally relax and enjoy.

The sweetness of the pancakes was a delightful contrast to the bitterness of the coffee, which made it much more palatable.They were so good, in fact-

“I THINK THESE MIGHT BE BETTER THAN BEFORE!YOU HAVE DONE AND OUTSTANDING JOB!!”

Sans toyed with the misshapen smile, “thanks, bro.”

It was hard to try and figure what he was thinking, but despite his best efforts, Sans was still very obviously uncomfortable.He had pushed aside his plate and focused on the coffee, swirling it around in his mug.

“pap?”

He’d already been watching him when his brother lifted his gaze.

“i really am sorry.”

Staring in confused silence, he looked into his own mug, as if he expected to find an answer there.When only his darker reflection looked back at him, he returned his eyes to his brother.

“WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”

His eyes flickered as he struggled to maintain a steady look.

“about not letting you wear those things for so long.it made everything harder on you.”He couldn’t keep it up any longer as his eyes fell back to his drink, “it was...it’s not okay.”

An uncomfortable sort of chill fell over him.It felt bad that his brother felt so guilty about something he’d never even really thought about.

“THAT’S NOT ENTIRELY TRUE!”

Sans clenched the mug further, like he might argue, but Papyrus was determined not to give him the chance.

“THINGS WERE VERY DIFFERENT UNDERGROUND!AND BY NOT WEARING THEM, I LEARNED HOW TO LIVE AND FIGHT, AND EVEN READ WITHOUT THEM!!”He could feel the weight lifting off his own shoulders.

“IT MADE ME MUCH STRONGER!AND IF MY GLASSES GOT KNOCKED OFF IN A BATTLE NOW, IT WOULDN’T AFFECT ME ONE BIT!!!”

His brother placed a hand over his face as he hunched further over the table.

“paps-“

“SANS, YOU DON’T ALWAYS HAVE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT THINGS.”

He pressed both hands against his face, muffling his voice.

“pap... _please_ -“

“I LOVE YOU AND I FORGIVE YOU.ISN’T THAT ENOUGH?”

When had his brother started shaking?

Jumping off of his chair, he swooped around the table to his brother’s side.Resting a hand on his back, he attempted to brush the hands covering his face away, but he refused.Standing sharply, he pulled his hood up before literally disappearing from the room.

Sans hadn’t been this upset for a while...what had he said?He’d been trying to encourage him!

Holding his arms, he wandered out of the kitchen.Knocking on the door to his office, his bedroom, he figured his first assumption had been correct.Sans had left the house entirely.Why was he so bent out of shape?Was this really all over the glasses?

Returning to the kitchen, he decided to clean the mess they’d made to take his mind off of it.Finding the home of each ingredient, wiping down the table and countertop, then finishing with the dishes.He shuddered to think of all the spots he’d missed over the years without glasses.

Once everything was done, he sat back down with his lonely cup of cold coffee.He looked back at his reflection.It was still him.Why would he expect to see someone else?

Drifting into thought, it occurred to him that the refrigerator had looked fairly  _bare_ _bones_ earlier.

He looked around, like the joke might summon his brother.But it didn’t because that’s absurd, why would he even think that.

He really should go grocery shopping, perhaps Undyne might like to join him!Finishing the coffee with a grimace, he washed out the final dish and set it with the others to dry.

He knew well enough to hold the phone away from himself as he dialed her number, only hearing it ring once before being greeted by an incredibly loud “PAPYYYRUUUUUUSSS!!!”

“HELLO, UNDYNE!!”

“Alph, say hi!YOU’RE ON SPEAKER PHONE, PAP!

“H-hello, Papyrus!”

“HELLO, ALPHYS!HOW ARE YOU BOTH DOING ON THIS BEAUTIFUL SATURDAY??”

“I’D BE DOING BETTER IF YOU AT LEAST CAME OVER TO SPAR WITH ME EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE!!”Alphys giggled in the background.

“DON’T BE RIDICULOUS, UNDYNE, I WAS JUST OVER...” when was the last time he’d been over?

“Yeah, exactly! You can’t even remember!!I’ll take ya off speaker, now.Al, say bye,”

“Bye, Papyrus.”

“GOODBYE, ALPHYS!”

“Alright, so what’s up!Don’t suppose you’re just callin’ to say hi, right?”

“NYEH HEH, YOU ARE CORRECT!HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO ACCOMPANY THE GREAT PAPYRUS ON A SHOPPING ADVENTURE??”

“Sounds kinda boring! But yeah sure, why not!On one condition, though.”

“AM I TO ASSUME THE CONDITION IS FIGHTING?” 

“You know me so well, Pap!”

“THEN YOU HAVE A DEAL!WILL ALPHYS BE COMING AS WELL??”

“Uh, hang on, lemme ask,” he could only hear muffled voices for a moment, then “nah, she’d rather STAY AT HOME AND BE LAME!!”

He chuckled as he pulled the phone back a little again, “NYEH HEH HEH, VERY WELL!!I SHALL ACCOMPANY YOU FROM YOUR RESIDENCY POST HAST!!”

“Hah, okay, dork!See ya soon, UNDYNE OUT!!”

He could feel his smile from cheek to cheek, it had been longer than he realized since they last hung out...this was going to be fun!!And he could show off his fantastic new glasses!

Sliding his phone back in his pocket, his smile faded.He decided to check the rooms again in case Sans had returned.

He hadn’t.

Sighing as he headed back to his own bedroom, he tossed his wallet and glasses case in the backpack he kept his camera in.He was awfully fond the present he’d received from King- or rather, Mr. Asgore.He had told him it was especially good for ‘cataloguing the progression of monster-mankind relations’, but he mostly liked using it to take lots of pictures of his friends (and himself).

With everything ready, he headed back downstairs.It would be best to at least leave a note for Sans, in case he came home to find it empty.

‘SANS,

I HAVE GONE GROCERY SHOPPING WITH UNDYNE ON THE CONDITION WE FIGHT AFTERWARDS.CALL IF YOU THINK OF ANYTHING YOU’D NEED’

He stopped himself from writing ‘because you’re too lazy to ever go shopping’.Now might not be the best time to jape his brother.

‘LOVE,’

Hmmm.

‘YOUR BROTHER PAPYRUS’

If he was being completely honest with himself,he didn’t exactly feel very great at this exact moment.

Nodding contentedly at the thoughtfully crafted note, he placed it on the dining room table before putting on his shoes and rushing out the door.While he was still trying to figure out what to say to Sans that could make any of this better, he couldn’t help but hurry.Undyne can make any day exponentially better!And maybe she could even help him think of something!How does that saying go?Two birds in one hand, a stone in a bush?Close enough!


	4. The Ticket To The Future Is Always Blank

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I meditate diligently every morning. The subject is Life and Love. I quit after three seconds."

  The walk to Undyne and Alphys’ house was close to double that of the one to Ms. Toriel and Frisk’s. It was an exceptionally picturesque walk, as it neared the edge of the city.Cafes and small shops buzzing with people and monsters alike, dogs being walked (far less annoying ones), stunning birch trees decorating the landscapes.

He tried his best not to get too tied up in the distractions of detail, but he indulged himself with the greenery a few times.

With their familiar dark blue house coming into view, he could feel his feet moving faster.The details of the architecture that he’d never really noticed before were a delightful surprise.The woodwork had expertly crafted curls and vines etched in, and the stonework on the side...every stone was entirely different!Shape, size, color! 

Nearly there, he could see the two of them in the entryway.

“Papyrus!!”Undyne waved a goodbye to her partner as she trotted to the sidewalk to meet him, “What took ya so long?”

She smiled slyly, tapping the rim of his glasses once he was close enough.

“Nice!!Now you look even more like a dork!!”

Pretending to adjust the taped down glasses, he puffed his chest out.

“PERHAPS, BUT A VERY STYLISH DORK, AT THAT!!”

Both laughing, he waved to Alphys, who returned it with a smile before retreating back inside.

“But seriously, did someone give you a hard time?Do I need to beat someone up?!”She punched her own hand, already visibly irritated.

“NO, NOTHING LIKE THAT!! NYEH HEH HEH!”He waved her off, toying at the collar of his shirt.After the morning he had, he wasn’t as excited as he thought to talk about his new and improved vision.

Eyeing him suspiciously, he could tell she wanted to push.

“I JUST, STOPPED TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHO RECOGNIZED ME!!AN OLD FRIEND!!!”

She stared at him.

“Pap, you SUCK at lying.”

They started walking as he averted his eyes.He had been planning to ask for her advice, so why was it so difficult to talk about?

“Come on.Spill.”

Taking a deep breath, he tried to find the right words.

“ITS SANS.I DON’T KNOW WHY BUT HE HAS A REALLY HARD TIME TALKING TO ME WHEN I WEAR GLASSES!”

Her eye twitched, but he didn’t give her the chance to speak.

“AND I HAVEN’T EVEN TRIED WEARING THEM IN A LONG TIME!!BUT THIS MORNING HE GOT REALLY WEIRD ABOUT IT!!HE SAID HE FELT BAD FOR MAKING ME NOT WEAR THEM!”He should really stop now.

“AND I TOLD HIM I WASN’T MAD BUT IT ONLY MADE HIM MORE UPSET!!I DON’T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT NOW HE’S GONE AND I’M SCARED AND HE-“ her hand gripped his shoulder, and he was suddenly, painfully aware of the tears on his face.

Meeting her eye, he found concern, mingled with a touch of anger.He tried to not cry in front of her especially, but he wasn’t met by teasing, or annoyance.

“Pap...You and your dumb brother have always been close.”He felt his shoulders relax somewhat, “That doesn’t mean everything you do has to make him happy.”

The tension in his shoulders returned with a fury as he pulled away from her.She didn’t seem surprised, letting him stop them in the middle of the sidewalk.

He stared at her in stunned silence, unsure of what to say next.What was she even talking about?

Rolling her eye, she put a hand on her hip, “I just mean,” sighing, she rubbed her temple, “look- Do those things make you happy?”

He nodded sheepishly.

“Then wear ‘em!!Your brother’s just gunna have to learn to deal with it.”

They remind him of someone...

“UNDYNE?”

“Yeah?”She perked up.

“HAVE YOU EVER KNOWN ANY OTHER SKELETONS?”

And now she looked lost.

“Besides you and Sans?”She cocked her brow.He could tell by the tone of her voice what the answer was.

“Nope!You two weirdos stand out in any crowd!!”Accentuating her words with an affection punch to the arm, he smiled back to her, hoping it looked more sincere than it felt.

“Now lets getting going!!I’m itchin’ to throw a few real punches!!”

As they continued onward, she told him about how she had gotten a job at a new gym in town, and how much fun it was to kick the humans into shape.About Alphys’ newest experiment, and her recent work with the human scientists in the city.

Letting her voice guide him from his own thoughts, he could feel his initial excitement replace his worries, telling her about the sunset last night, and how much better the flowers and the trees looked.How helping Frisk do their English homework didn’t even give him a headache.She was a little taken aback by just how poor his vision had been.The doctor said he was near AND far sighted, which, contrary to how it sounded, is not a good thing!

His apprehension took a backseat, allowing him to enjoy the afternoon with his friend.They even stopped into a few extra shops!Running into Dogamy and Dogaressa was a pleasant surprise!! But time flies when you’re having fun, and boy did it - it was already 5 o’clock!It was about time to head back to Undyne’s house.

“Just put that stuff in the fridge, then come out back!!”She called over her shoulder as she headed down their side yard.

If he hadn’t known Alphys was home, he wouldn’t have guessed it.He called a greeting out, regardless, as he made his way into the kitchen.It was the work of a couple of minutes to get any temperature sensitive groceries into the refrigerator.It was slightly more difficult to ignore the mess left from last night’s dinner (whatever was caked on the stove was also on the ceiling), which he resolved to offer help with later.

Upon exiting into the generously large back yard, something cloth was throw directly into his face.

“You forgot a change of clothes!!”

Pulling what he discovered to be a tank top off of his face, he thanked her while her pulled his own shirt off to replace it.Undyne mocked him with a whistle, prompting him to blow a kiss once the tank top was comfortably in place.

“Enough with the flirtin’!LET’S FIGHT!!!”

Jumping into action, blue magic lit up the yard in a matter of seconds.Spears and bones sailing through the air, though they were both careful not to hit the house.It felt so natural, it couldn’t really have been too long since their last match.Neither could even land more than a handful of blows.

“NOT BAD!!”She lunged forwards, missing him by a centimeter, “Thought you’d be RUSTY!!”

Blocking another attack with his own, he pushed her several yards backwards.

“I REALLY MISSED THIS!!!” He chimed, earning a laugh from his assailant.

“SAME HERE!!Humans are so BORING!They don’t even use magic anymore!!”She dived out of the way of a row of bones, throwing several spears at once.

Blocking, parrying, landing a few blows; it had to have been going on an hour and then some before the tiredness started to kick in.

“COME ON!! ONE LAST HURRAH!GIVE ME ALL YOU GOT!!!”

Rows upon rows of spears lit up the now twilight sky behind her, giving him only a brief moment to rally his own attacks.

Both were panting heavily when something stopped her, staring behind him with her eye wide. Papyrus dismissed his attacks and spun around to face whatever had surprised his her, but...

There was nothing there.

Turning back, he found her attacks gone now as well, and a very wide, excited smile.

“YOU DIDN’T TELL ME YOU COULD USE ORANGE MAGIC!!!!!!”

She tore across the yard, punching him firmly in the shoulder, all signs of fatigue gone, besides the heavy breathing.

“WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU HOLD OUT ON ME???”

Orange?What was she talking about?!

“I CAN DO ORANGE MAGIC????”

“WAIT, YOU DIDN’T KNOW?!?”

Somehow she was getting louder.

“OH MY GOD, PAPYRUS!!!!”

Firmly grasping his shoulders, she shook him like a damp piece of paper.

“YOU CAN DO ORANGE ATTACKS!!!!”

“I...CAN DO ORANGE ATTACKS!”Trying his best to regulate his breathing, his face must’ve read as completely confused as he felt.She slowed, placing both hands on her hips.

“Why aren’t you freaking out, Pap, THIS IS GREAT!!”She raised one hand out proudly, still trying to catch her breath as well, “Orange attacks are AWESOME!”

“I’M JUST...REALLY TIRED.”Really  _exhausted_ .His smile was sincere though!! This was exciting!!It was just...getting harder to show it....to keep standing.

“Yeah, I guess performing a new strong attack at the end of a two hour magic streak might not’ve been the best-“

Knowing his legs were ready to give out, he eased down into the grass, lying on his back.

“Shit, Pap!You okay?!”She crouched down beside him, but his focus was on the vague outline of a crescent moon, barely visible in the light of the setting sun.

“I DIDN’T KNOW YOU COULD SEE THE SUN AND THE MOON AT THE SAME TIME!”He turned to smile at her, receiving a tick of her tongue.

Punching his arm, more gently, she shifted into a more comfortable position, watching the sky as well, “That’s what I get for being worried about you, dork.”

The deep grey-blue sky turned into a rich sea blue soon enough, shapes of clouds obscuring most of the stars.After recovering some strength, they brushed off their clothes, and wandered back into the house.

Alphys had since migrated back upstairs, comfortably sat on the couch with her laptop, typing furiously until she noticed the back door open.

“How was practice?”She smiled politely at Papyrus while Undyne strolled into the kitchen behind him.

“PAPS CAN USE ORANGE MAGIC NOW!!”

A flash of...panic? seemed to cross her eyes, but it was gone in an instant.

“Really?Like King As- no, I mean, uh, Mr. Dreemurr?”

His eyes stretched wide, “WAIT, MR. ASGORE USES ORANGE MAGIC?!?!”

Undyne reappeared beside him, an apple missing a bite in hand, “YEP!! Blue and Orange, just like you!!!”Slamming her free hand against his back, she laughed.

That was.... astonishing!! Astounding!!!Staggering!!!!So why did it feel like he just got punched in the stomach?

“WOWIE!!!!”He did his best to sound as excited as he knew he should feel, passing without so much as a suspicious glance.

“You know what that means, don’t you?”The look in Undyne’s eye was enough to convince him he didn’t want to.

“I’M GUNNA HAVE TO PUMMEL YOU TWICE AS HARD!! FUHUHUHU!!

Landing another brisk blow on his back, he coughed before joining her in laughing.Alphys watched them, amused by their antics, but there was still a shadow on her face.

“ANYWAY!!I’m starved!!But I’m also tired as hell!I’m ordering takeout!!”She pulled out her phone, already dialing when she glance back to her friend, “Wanna stay for dinner?”

Glancing down at his phone, it was 7:56.Sans was probably home by now, right?He couldn’t tell if that was a good incentive to go or stay.

“Pap?”

He was met with the eyes of both hosts once he realized he‘d just been staring at his phone.

“WHAT A FANTASTIC IDEA! I WOULD LOVE TO!!!”

“THAT’S MORE LIKE IT!!”Dipping back into the kitchen, she continued rambling off an order, leaving Alphys and Papyrus alone again.

In two strides, he was at the couch, mindfully sitting at the far end, offering a smile.

The scientist averted her eyes, typing another string of words before closing her laptop and setting it on the table.He took the opportunity to type out a quick text to his brother that he was still with Undyne and Alphys before setting his phone beside it.

“Are there any shows, o-or anime you’d like me to put on?”

“ANYTHING IS FINE BY ME!THE GREAT PAPYRUS ENJOYS WHATEVER PLEASES HIS FRIENDS!!EVEN IF IT’S WEIRD CARTOONS!”Even though the both of them had passionately explained why anime wasn’t just a cartoon shortly after arriving to the surface, he still couldn’t really differentiate them.

She laughed with a sigh, fiddling with the remote before her eyes lit up with an idea.

“Wait!I think I know one you’d really like.”Turning the television on, she accessed whatever it was she was looking for with speed.

“I LIKE HIS SUNGLASSES!”

Winning him another, less exasperated giggle, she stopped suddenly.

“Oh!!I meant to tell you, um, glasses look...really nice on you!”A light shade of pink spread across her cheeks.He didn’t get the chance to thank her before Undyne paraded back into the room.

“What’d you glasses-wearing nerds decide on??”She stood directly in front of the tv, a laugh escaping her.

“That’s a good one!!”Shooting a look back to Papyrus, “This guys almost as big a dork as you!!”

She tossed a bottle of water to him, followed by a contented flop down onto the couch between the two of them.

“It’s gunna take ‘em like, an hour, so we’ve got plenty of time!”

Whatever was bothering Alphys seemed to be gone as she cuddle up next to Undyne, starting the first episode of the show.

It ended up taking a little over an hour before the delivery human arrived, carrying a surprising number of packages.They ate Chinese food on the couch, pointing out which characters reminded them of friends.As the story became more involved, they quieted back down. 

It made pretty immediate sense why this character reminded them of him.He also had a strong opposition to killing, and was quite talented at many thing!And he really did have nice sunglasses.It was actually a pretty good show so far, but things were starting to get pretty dramatic.It was also getting a little difficult to follow...the characters moved without sound sometimes...he hadn’t realized he’d started feeling very heavy.But comfortable. It was....quiet.But a good quiet....a very good....


	5. No Scars

Without using a shortcut, it was a several hour walk to the mountain.It was a decent change of pace.Walking gave him time to think.Time to figure out what was getting under his nonexistent skin.

He wasn’t keeping track, but the sun was in the dead center of the sky, so it had to be around noon, maybe one.Even in the three or so hours he’d already been going, he couldn’t think one linear thought.

He shouldn’t have left like that, but it was too hard to speak with that  _look_ strangling him.With those  _things_  on his brother’s face, it felt like every glance could see straight through him.Even when he was smiling, he looked like he was somewhere else.Somewhere....bad.

Something as small and insignificant as glasses shouldn’t be able to make a room go cold.Shouldn’t make it feel like he was standing on a cliff, about to tumble over the edge.But the most frustrating part of it all was that he didn’t know why.

  He couldn’t remember why.

Alphys wears glasses, Grillby wears glasses, Asgore, Tori, half the damn monsters he’d ever known!  So what was it about his bold, happy, brave, inspiring brother that made him look like...like a ghost?

It was an old feeling, but a familiar one.One that twisted him up in ways he couldn’t really put into words.It wasn’t dissimilar to the resets.A memory.It was like watching the water drain from your hands just before you can lift it to your face.You need it to live but after so many failed attempts, you don’t even want to try anymore...

But you keep trying.And trying.And  _trying_.

He could feel a tightness in his chest, one that felt like it could tear him apart if he let it.All he wanted was for his brother to be happy, so why?Why did it always come back to this?Was it some cruel joke?Did the human know, somehow, that those stupid fucking glasses could ruin him?Instead of resetting, they’d push his brother away from him?

 

No.

It wasn’t Frisk.

It was him.

This wasn’t anyone’s fault but his own.He should be able to handle a little change.Change is good.Change is living on the surface, driving a car, having a job, living with humans.Change is...wearing glasses.

Maybe he was the one who needed glasses.Everything was out of focus.He was getting desperate for an answer. 

He had convinced Alphys to talk Asgore into not destroying the ‘entry’ into Mt. Ebott, arguing it would be too difficult to move the entire lab to the surface...and it would be good to have it as a backup in case the humans changed their minds.The anomaly wasn’t their only problem, after all.

Maybe he could find something there.There was _something_ he'd  missed before.It had been so long, he would be looking with fresh eyes, so to speak, and he might find something he never noticed.

Or someone.

He had to figure out who, or what, Papyrus reminded him of before...before....well, he didn’t know.But that was  _so_ much easier said than done.

His phone buzzed.

Fishing it out of his pocket, he was greeted by a picture of Undyne at..?Oh, a market, proudly holding a dead fish roughly the size of her entire torso, a vaguely distressed human in the background.

‘SHE IS SO UNSANITARY!!!!’

Shaking his head, he chuckled, putting his phone away.His brother was definitely the same goofy skeleton as always...

He could see the cave now, through the trees. _Mine_ as well go ahead and-

He was in the ruins.A shiver ran up his spine, everything was darker than he remembered.It really was a completely different world.He jumped past Toriel’s old home, it still felt like snooping.Or maybe he just didn’t want to see it empty.From there, it wasn’t long before he recognized the clearing his ‘sentry station’ had been in.Long gone, only a thin layer of snow remained in its place. 

Fresh snow hadn’t fallen since they shut down the Core, but it was cold enough that some still remained.

The entire atmosphere of the underground had declined in their absence, reverting to its natural, less magical state.And yet it barely felt like anything had changed.It never really did feel like home, even when it was all they knew.

It was strange, seeing their old house.Without the warm glow of the Christmas lights, it looked downright unsettling...but he wasn’t here to reminisce.

He hadn’t bothered locking the basement door when they left, there wasn’t anything worth protecting down there.It looked the same as it ever had, minus the blueprints he finally had the will to destroy.The machine was broken.There was no fixing it.Even when it felt like breaking off a finger when he burned them.Breaking all of his fingers.

It was hard to let them go.

  To let it all go.

His hands were balled into fists in his pockets, but that didn’t stop them from shaking.Doing his best to stop that strangled feeling from choking him up again, he headed back up the stairs.

The air was so stale, it started to feel like he couldn’t even breathe.He only had one place left to go, but he was starting to get lightheaded.He clumsily pulled his phone back out, tapping open the recent calls log.His thumb hovered above the most recent entry, shaking with effort...but he couldn’t.Not yet.Not after the way he left that morning.

_he’s with undyne, he’s happy._

He was so mad.Mad at himself.Mad at Frisk, mad at the glasses, mad at the god damn doctor that made them.This whole thing was so  _stupid._ He could feel his fingers clenching tighter around the phone.A crack.Then a pop.

His jaw clenched hard enough to hurt, he let go.The small device fell to the ground, his eyes unfocused as he looked down to it.Still in one piece, as far as he could tell. 

“god damn it, kid.of all the things...”

The sound of his own voice pulled him back, slightly.It felt good to hear something.To feel like this wasn’t all just happening inside his head.

He half-begrudgingly picked up the now damaged phone,  _just_ _a_ _crack,_   _nothin’_ _al_ _can’t_ _fix_ , and headed off towards Hotland.

This time, though, he started humming.That song he used to wake up to, if Papyrus hadn’t left for patrol yet, when he’d make breakfast spaghetti.His brother sang it better, but it was enough.

He realized he didn’t hear it anymore.

* * *

 

Darkness greeted him as his eyes fluttered open.It was only a moment before his eyes adjusted to the dim and he realized he was not in his bedroom.

Undyne and Alphys were asleep right in front of him.They were also on top of his legs.He reached blindly for his phone, grateful for the automatic display that glowed when he bumped it.

3:12am

Missed call

His heart jumped to his throat as he fumbled anxiously with the oddly small device.Except his excitement was wasted, the call had not been from his brother.He didn’t even recognize the number.Disappointment waned as he hoped that Sans had fallen asleep, as well, and would feel better upon waking.

However, his situation was more sticky than that.He hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but it made sense considering how  bone tired he felt after sparring with Undyne...he wanted to scold himself for such an awful joke.It was still difficult to grasp that he’d used a completely new kind of magic without realizing it...  Or rather, almost completely new.

But Undyne had been fairly tired as well, so he could probably...

Taking measured movements, he slid his narrow legs out from underneath his friends.Quite successfully, he would add. Although, it would be rude just to leave after falling asleep at their home, especially after they’d been so gracious!

He stood, lost in thought, when he remembered the kitchen.It was still a mess!They were deep enough sleepers that if he remained especially mindful, he knew he could tidy it without disturbing them.

Creeping into the other room, he flicked the switch, peaking out from the doorway to make sure the light hadn’t bothered them. They looked especially cute draped over each other like that.

It was time to get to work!

Starting with the dishes, he avoided setting them down in any way that would make a sound.It took longer, and their entire counter was covered by the time he was done, but he was proud of the stealthy job!

The stovetop itself was a much greater feet.Grates are inherently noisy, and scraping anything was nearly impossible, but with patience and almost their entire box of baking soda, it was finally shiny again.

Admiring his glasses yet again in the reflection, he gave himself finger guns, when something else caught his eye.The window was also reflected along the rim of the oven.The sky was already getting lighter!Good grief, it was nearly 5:30!!!

A noise from the living room stifled his surprise.The shuffling of someone getting off the couch hit him with that exposed feeling that kept creeping up on him lately.

He didn’t have much time to do anything besides turn around before Alphys appeared in the doorway.Rubbing an eye and squinting in the light, she was greeted by a smile and a whispered ‘GOOD MORNING!’

“Papyrus...what are you doing?”

Keeping her tone low, she didn’t seem suspicious so much as flat out confused.

“I WOKE UP BUT I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE RUDE TO LEAVE WITHOUT SAYING GOODBYE!SO I THOUGHT I COULD AT LEAST MAKE MYSELF USEFUL!!”Keeping his voice as quiet as possible, he stressed his enthusiasm to make sure she didn’t think he was upset and that’s why he was up.

Her tired eyes watched him a moment longer, too sleep lagged to really reply with anything more than an ‘okay’ before she ambled up the stairs beside the doorway.

As she disappeared around the bend, he jumped back into action.Now he would tackle the stuff speckling the ceiling.Sauce stars, if you will.Quiet as a breeze, he slipped into the dining room and absconded back to the kitchen with a chair. 

Already started by the time Alphys reappeared, she ambled into the kitchen, more conscious now.She seemed concerned to find him vigorously scrubbing the ceiling with a sponge in one hand, and a bowl of soapy water in the other. 

“You really don’t have to do that, some of those are pretty old...”

“THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAN VANQUISH ANY STAIN!NYEH HEH HEH!” He flicked his wrist, showering the space between them with a a trickle of drops.

Beginning to pick up on the fact that he legitimately wanted to do this, she relaxed into a smile, “You know, you’re probably...the only person I know who can yell quietly.”

“I AM VERY TALENTED.”

Stepping back slightly, she fiddled with her hands, “It’s still pretty earlier, but, um, I could just take a nap later if you’d like some company?”

He stopped to look at her, smile taking up most of his face, “THAT WOULD BE EXCELLENT!!”

She blushed lightly, nodding her acknowledgment before dipping out of the kitchen for a moment to retrieve her laptop and glasses.Returning, she carefully stacked some of the dishes to make a spot on the (adorable) ‘island’ behind him.She was also a master of quietly maneuvering dishes!

He couldn’t tell if she wanted to talk so he resolved to wait for her to start a conversation.He wanted to ask her about the project Undyne had mentioned earlier, but maybe she wouldn’t want to talk about work!

Finishing the ceiling, he stepped off the chair, replacing the now gross water so he could tackle the wall behind the oven next.

She also seemed unsure of whether or not to speak, but when he threw a smile her way before continuing, she understood.

“It’s...pretty cool you can use orange magic now.”

Flinching, he looked back over his shoulder without stopping, “WERE YOU TELLING ME THE TRUTH WHEN YOU SAID MR. ASGORE USES BOTH ORANGE AND BLUE MAGIC?”

Toying with a broken key on her keyboard, she wouldn’t meet his eyes, “Oh, yeah!Yeah, he did.I guess...he used to.” a frown worked its way back onto her face as her eyes focused on the computer screen, “he really hates using magic anymore.”

His hand stuttered, but he only looked away for a moment, catching her off guard with another smile when she looked back to him.

“IT’S VERY ADMIRABLE OF HIM.”

The corners of her mouth turned up enough to reassure him, “Yeah...”

He gave it breathing room, turning back to the wall.It seemed odd, the whole thing about his orange magic...maybe Alphys would know more about it.

“IS IT NORMAL TO JUST, ACCIDENTALLY USE NEW MAGIC?”

He could feel her eyes on the back of his head, but kept his fixed on the specks in front of him.

“Um...I guess so.”He heard her laptop shift, finally earning her a glance back.She was resting her chin on her hands, looking off in consideration.

“Every monster is different, and I’ve...never known any monsters like you and your brother.”

“SKELETONS?”His hand slowed.

“Uh...yeah...yeah.Skeletons.”She seemed...put off.But she carried on, “So it’s kind of hard to say.But you’re strong!It might just...come naturally.

They blinked at each other a few times before both smiling awkwardly and returning to their tasks. 

“THAT MAKES SENSE!I AM PRETTY INCREDIBLE!!”

She agreed with a giggle, followed by the sound of claws tapping on her keyboard.

 

It was 6:42am by the time the sun rose.They talked a little bit about how Mettaton was doing, and about Sans.He didn’t mention the glasses thing.Once he was done with the stains, Alphys offered him coffee, which he then insisted on making. 

It wasn’t too long after that a fit of giggles from talking about her summoned Undyne herself.She had total bed head, which didn’t help.The arm punch did, though.Alphys got a kiss on the forehead.Getting her own cup of coffee, she didn’t even notice the transformation of the kitchen as she procured a bowl cereal.Not until she had to move the clean dishes to sit down, anyway.

“Wait!So how long have you been up?”Her eye was wide, with, perhaps, a hint of annoyance.He didn’t usually spend the night anywhere but home, so it made sense she didn’t know that he didn’t need as much sleep as most.

“ABOUT FIVE HOURS.”She only stared at his innocuous smile, so he took the opportunity to continue, “I ONLY REALLY NEED A FEW HOURS OF SLEEP FOR A DAY, SO I’M FINE!!!”

Alphys choked on her coffee, lowering the mug in shock, “How many is a few?”

Undyne’s expression was growing less patient by the second, the scientist’s distressed.

“TWO OR THREE.SOMETIMES FOUR!I USUALLY BREAK IT UP INTO NAPS SO I CAN WAKE UP WITH EVERYONE ELSE!’”He tried his best to make it sound braggadocios, but he could hear his own voice going higher.

His friends exchanged a look, both thoroughly unconvinced.Pushing her bowl out of the way, Undyne clasped her hands together while pointing, resting her finger tips on the counter.

“So, you’re telling me...you actually, usually only sleep for like, two hours,”She stole one more glance from Alphys, knitting her eyes brows further as she looked back to him, “every night.”

“MY BROTHER SLEEPS ENOUGH FOR THE BOTH OF US!!NYEH HEH!!!”

She squared her shoulders, “Pap, I’m bein’ serious here.”

“She’s right, Papyrus, that’s....really not good.” Alphys chimed in.Worry on both their faces, he suddenly found himself struggling to reassure them.

“I’VE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS!REALLY!!I’M FINE!!!”It was normal for him, they just needed to understand that!

Undyne glared at him, unshaken, “Does Sans know?”

Why did that matter?

“OF COURSE!!” Did his voice just crack?“WHY WOULDN’T HE?”

Her eye was just a slit by this point, why would she be mad at him for not needing as much sleep as her?  They’d all joked about it before!  He lifted his hand to the stem of his glasses in an effort to distract himself from the rising panic in his chest.

Alphys rested a hand on her girlfriend’s, looking to him with much softer eyes, “I think she just means...it’s surprising you haven’t mentioned it before.”

  He realized how nervous he must be coming off and tried his best to tone it down.

“IT’S NEVER BEEN A PROBLEM!”He hadn’t realized his smile fell, but it was back now, in full tilt, “THERE’S ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT!!”

Undyne wasn’t one to stand down, but she leaned back, crossing her arms, “Then it shouldn’t bother you to do a sleep study.”

“A WHAT?”Him and Alphys raised their brows in unison, surprised for considerably different reasons.

“Ya know, when scientists hook your brain up to machines and it scans ya when you’re sleeping.”

“WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO DO THAT??”That sounded fake and uncomfortable!!

“To make sure your brain is firin’ on all cylinders.”She shrugged, nonchalantly sipping her coffee, “Had to get one when I was a kid, on account of some pretty nasty nightmares.”

Alphys attempted a smile, “They’re really not so bad...you just sleep like normal and then wake up and go home.”Undyne nodded her agreement.

Why were they so obsessed with his sleep all of a sudden ?

“I-I DONT KNOW-”

“C’mon, Pap, it’s fun!! Makes you feel all science-y!” Her sharp stare gave way to a genuine excitement as she jumped to her feet, “If it’s really normal for you, it’ll say so!”

His eyes drifted to Alphys, encouraging him with a sympathetic smile, “They’re very safe, and I would be happy to help.”

“FRISK SAID YOU’RE NOT THAT KIND OF DOCTOR.”At this point, it was obvious even to him that he just didn’t want to do it.As much as he really admired scientists, he always felt exceptionally uncomfortable around that kind of stuff.

She snickered, blushing lightly, “I can run a simple diagnostic test like that.”

There was nothing simple about it.

“IF IT MEANS THAT MUCH TO YOU TWO...” he averted his eyes.Sans had always told him to not give in to peer pressure, but they weren’t peers!They were friends!!

“GOOD!I was gettin’ worried I’d have to knock you out to do it!”

Laughing as she punched the air, Alphys rolled her eyes, standing beside her, “So when are we doin’ this?Right now??”

“I’M NOT EVEN TIRED!!!” That came out so much sharper than he meant it to.He couldn’t bury the dismay deep enough before it repossessed his face.

“We should probably wait until later, Undyne...” the scientist’s voice trailed off as her words didn’t seem to reach the more brazen monster, “...or tomorrow...”

Instead, she was looking at the skeleton like he was some sort of scared animal, “Why is this freaking you out so bad?”She looked genuinely concerned, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen ya like this, Pap.”

The two sets of eyes, with only well meaning in them, felt like 20, vacant and judgmental....He usually loved when they fussed over him, but why did it have to involve the lab?

He let his vulnerability overpower him, dropping his voice barely above a whisper, “Do...do we have to go back to the underground...?”

Undyne visibly flinched, reeling from the unexpected question.Alphys reacted much more swiftly, scurrying around the island to take one of his hands.

“No!No, of course not!I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you thought...”

Undyne looked out the window, shrinking slightly as she held her own arm.The other did her best to reassure him, “There are plenty of places in the city we can go!It’s...probably closer to your optometrist appointment than anything I ever did...down there...”

Taking her hands in his, he didn’t get the chance thank her before Undyne stormed around the island as well, turning him around to face her.

“I told you the day we made it to the surface; WE’RE NEVER GOING BACK THERE, NO MATTER WHAT!!PAPYRUS!”She pulled him forward by the collar of his shirt, breath fogging over his glasses, “I’m the LAST person who would EVER take you back there.YOU GOT THAT?!”

He welcomed the familiar warmth blossoming from his soul, “YES, SIR!!”He saluted, narrowly missing her head in the process.

“CLOSE ENOUGH!”

Releasing him into a stagger, he used the counter behind them to brace himself.His usual face-stretching grin meeting Alphys as he looked back to her, regaining his vision.It felt fantastic to feel normal again!!! She patted his arm with a true smile, one he hadn’t recalled seeing since before his arrival yesterday.

_Yesterday!_

Spinning around, the clock confirmed that it was just after nine.He hadn’t been home for almost twenty-four hours!!

“IT’S GETTING VERY LATE, I HAVE TO GO!!” Without another word, he pulled the duo in for a hug, long enough to stabilize his still elevated pulse, and then flew to the front door of the house.

His name ringing out behind him, he stopped rigidly on the sidewalk to see Undyne chasing after him with three paper bags.

_The_ _groceries!_

“You’re such a doofus!”Pushing them into his arms with more force than necessary, he managed to maintain his balance, “THANKS!!I CAN’T BELIEVE I FORGOT _OLIVE_ MY GROCERIES!NYEH HEH HEH!”

Taking back off before she could even stop laughing at the admittedly horrible joke, he peaked back over his shoulder for a second to watch her shrinking behind him, letting the final high note of his visit reverberate inside his skull.

Maybe Sans had needed a sleep study before, it had to be unhealthy how much he slept...maybe he really was sleeping for the both of them!Surely their last conversation could be dismissed as easily as the first confrontation over the glasses!And this could serve as a good change of topic!

Undyne was right though, he knew it.   Sans would learn to love his glasses just as much as he loved every other part of his brother!What’s not to love about The Great Papyrus?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ice been dying to write from Sans’ point of view!!


	6. Wither Without You

Resting her weight on her hips, she watched her friend disappear into the trees and houses and monsters blocks away.Even when she couldn’t see him, she watched.Smile melting into a more somber expression, she walked back to her worried companion in the doorway of their home.

“What’s the matter, Dy?”

Pulling the door shut behind them, she fell back against it, crossing her arms with sigh.

“I’ve never seen him like that,” she let Alphys brush her hair from her face, “he’s helped you before, with lab stuff, right?”

She contemplated, double checking her own memory before nodding, “Yeah, a few times.This did seem...like a pretty extreme reaction.”

“I mean,” letting her girlfriend lead them back to the living room couch, she put her feet on the table and focused on the ceiling, “we’ve had movie nights, right?And anime nights!”She waved an arm out to accentuate her frustration, “I’ve never seen him not sleeping!”

Curling up against her, they watched the ceiling together.It really needed repainted.

“But now that you mention it...” Alphys entwined their hands as she spoke, “I don’t think I’ve ever really noticed him sleeping, either...”

“Yeah...” Slapping her hand to her forehead, she cursed under her breath, “I know we’ve joked about it before, but I didn’t realize...”

Nothing about this situation was sitting right with her...she didn’t want to go behind Papyrus’ back, but she was itchin’ to ask Sans about it.Of course, now might not be the best time to drive that wedge any further, he’d already managed to make his optimistic, kind hearted brother cry at least once this week...

Over glasses, of all things.

“Babe?”

Pulling her focus back to her girlfriend in a gesture for her to continue, the other glanced away.

“Did you really see him use orange magic?”

Gladly shifting gears, she shook their joined hands, “Yeah!!It was sick!”Rows and rows of blue and orange attacks had appeared like a wall behind the skeleton, it had actually been pretty overkill for a sparring match.

“It was a frickin’ light show!”

“Oh...okay.”Her eyes drifted back up to meet the ones looking at her, a smile fighting to conceal the worry on her face.

“What?What’s with the look?”Undyne teased playfully, but the discomfort she was starting to feel from the tone was obvious. 

Reassuring her with a squeeze of their hands, Alphys shook her head apologetically, “...it’s fine!I just wanted....to make sure you were okay.”

Okay?!She was worried...about Papyrus hurting her?!?

She laughed out loud, startlingly her partner.Pulling her hand back to wrap her arm around the other, she cocked her brow, “Papyrus??You were worried about Pap hurtin’ me???”She tried not to sound too incredulous, but that had to be a joke!

“He couldn’t take me on his best day!Not with any color magic!!”She squeezed the smaller monster into a hug, especially enjoying the little squeak she let out.

“I-I know!!” She pulled back just enough to fix her glasses, then rested her hands on Undyne’s shoulders, tracing small circles with her claws, “But if he just...did it by accident, and you weren’t ready-“

“Al.”She pushed her forehead against her worried partner’s, “I’m  _always_ ready. ”

Giggling, she conceded and rolled her head onto the other’s shoulder.

“Alright...”

It was still early enough that they could relax like that for a while longer before they inevitably had to go on with the rest of their day.She resolved to have Papyrus over more regularly, so they could explore his newfound ability without soliciting worry from her girlfriend.That, and she just really wanted to fight him with it.

 

* * *

 

   The air was warm, but heavy.There weren’t many clouds now, but he could tell it would probably rain before sundown.

After a close call with a missing chunk of sidewalk, he opted to slow down his run home for the sake of the groceries.It was nice to get a better view of everything he hadn’t the time to stop for yesterday.The clouds that were visible were soft and puffy, reminding him of a certain something that he most definitely did not miss having around at all.Not one bit!Even if he did feel badly about that particular something also abandoning his brother in the process...He would still show up from time to time, but he certainly enjoyed exploring the great outdoors!!

Maybe him and Sans should go camping, sometime.Frisk had told him all about their days exploring the forests surrounding the mountain before they fell.And it certainly wasn’t fun to camp in the snow, making it sufficiently harder to do so back home.

Home.

A slow breeze pressed against him as he stopped, now anchored to a spot on the sidewalk.Home was here now.On the surface.The world really was absolutely every dream he’d ever had and more, but...he couldn’t help feeling like he’d left part of himself back there...

It was scary.

His eyes were a little bleary as he finally picked his gaze up from the ground, but he could recognize his block.One of their human neighbors was outside, mowing their law.A pleasant man, rotund and jovial, much like Santa Claus.He had introduced himself and his other human friend when they’d moved in a few months ago. 

He had offered himself, and volunteered his brother, to help with some of their furniture, but Sans told him humans don’t usually like it when you throw things through their windows, and they said it was fine anyway.

When the man was coming back in his direction, he carefully rebalanced the paper bags to wave in greeting.He was surprised that when the man noticed, he quickly turned off his machine and ambled over.

“Good morning, Papyrus!”

“GOOD MORNING, MR. BARRETTE!!HAVE YOU REMEMBERED TO APPLY YOUR SUNSCREEN TODAY?”Frisk has taught him about the sun and humans, and while it was endlessly beautiful, it slowly radiated their skin!!How terrifying!

The human chuckled, a deep, genuine laughter, “Yes, I did, but thank you for reminding me!It looks like you have your hands full, so I-“ something caught his attention before he finished.

“Oh!Are those new?”He had been distracted by the glasses!

“NYEH!YES!! THEY DO LOOK QUITE REMARKABLE, DON’T THEY??”

Winning another chuckle from the man, it felt very good to know how much everyone else was liking them.

“Yes!Quite fine, indeed!But, um,” he glanced back towards their houses, “last night, when I got home from work, your front door was wide open.”He brought his attention back to the skeleton, “It didn’t seem like you were home, so I came over to check.”

Crossing his arms, the corners of his mouth turned down slightly, “When there was no answer, I closed the door and moved one of your planters in front of it, just to make sure it didn’t fall back open.”

“OH!!”Last night?Sans wasn’t back yet?“HOW SILLY OF ME TO LEAVE IT OPEN!!MY BROTHER AND I CAN BE,” he tapped a finger to his skull, “EMPTY-HEADED SOMETIMES!”

They laughed together, his neighbor wishing him a good day after he was thanked, before returning to the task of law maintenance, while he headed for his own house. 

Sliding the planter back into place with his foot, he couldn’t help but feel intimidated by the idea his brother hadn’t returned yet.It wasn’t entirely like him to disappear for a few days, but it was to do it without warning.

His hand rested on the doorknob until he decided he was being ridiculous and he needed to put the groceries away.Besides the gentle creak of the door, the house was quiet.He kept his gaze on the bags in hand as he scurried through the hall and into the kitchen.

The mundane repetition of putting the groceries in their rightful places helped calm his nerves.But it didn’t take nearly long enough.He decided to test his luck.Cupping his hands around his mouth,“SANS!!I’M HOME!!!”His call was dampened with reluctance.

When only silence answered, he wandered into the living room.Much to his relief, his brother laid asleep on the couch.It was still before noon, after all.Breathing a sigh of relief, he eased closer, sitting on the edge of the cushions.

“SANS?SANS.”He moved to rest a hand on his brother’s shoulder, shaking it gently, “SANS.”

Only one of his eyes opened, and only about a third of the way, “...paps?”

A bolt of panic hit him, his hand flying to his face to remove his glasses, sliding them into his back pocket before the other would notice.

“GOOD MORNING, BROTHER!!I HAVE RETURNED!”

Rolling groggily onto his back, his brother managed to pull himself up against the arm rest, watching him with both mostly lidded eyes.

“mornin’.were you at undyne’s all night?”

“WELL WHERE ELSE WOULD I HAVE BEEN!”The smile on his face only stretched wider as his brother acknowledged him, looking directly into his eye sockets without hesitation.

Maybe...Undyne wasn’t  _completely_ right...

“right, gotcha.”He rubbed his face, stretching one arm up, then rolling his neck.

“YOU HAVE A BED, YOU KNOW.”

He chuckled, followed by a yawn, “yeah, but then I woulda missed you gettin’ back in.”

“YOU MISSED THAT ANYWAY.”

Sans managed a proper laughat that, seemingly forgetting all about their...was it an argument?A fight?

“I BOUGHT EGGS!WOULD YOU LIKE SOME BREAKFAST?”Getting to his feet, he placed both hands on his hips.

“uh, yeah, thanks.”His brother’s eyes drifted downward, “what’s with the grass stains?”He nonchalantly flicked the knee of the other’s jeans, but that wasn’t all that important.

Turning to head back into the kitchen, he waved it off, “SPARRING!”Completely normal, uneventful sparring.No unexplainable details he needed to bother with.

He had already collected the necessary pan and dishes, and was washing the ingredients by the time his brother meandered in.

“did you have fun?”

“HMM?OH, YES!!”

He started telling Sans all about the cartoon Alphys had been excited to show him, about the hero who wouldn’t kill, and his feisty side kicks, and his cool, suit wearing partner; he rambled on about how Undyne insisted those two were just like him and his brother.

They sat and ate what was actually closer to lunch while he continued on about how Undyne had kicked his butt, and how they ate Chinese food with sticks instead of forks or spoons.

Only interjecting with the occasional agreement, or sad excuse for a joke, Papyrus could’ve choked on the pure joy he got from the completely normal interaction.

Sans eventually got up, starting the coffee maker, and offering his brother a cup of ‘bean tea’, so he decided to clean their dishes while they waited.

“AND ALPHYS EVEN GOT UP EARLY JUST TO KEEP ME COMPANY!!THEY LOVE ME ALMOST AS MUCH AS I LOVE THEM!!!!I JUST WISH UNDYNE WASHED HER HANDS MORE-“ his brother brushed up against his back.By the time he shot a look over his shoulder, Sans was sitting back at the table, smiling at him with a mug in hand.

Ignoring the odd gesture, he finished with the silverware and rejoined his brother at the table.

Thanking him for the coffee, he sipped it thoughtfully.He didn’t really feel like babbling anymore, but he wasn’t upset!It just...felt nice to sit here with coffee and enjoy each others’ presence.

He gazed happily at the reflection in the mug, barely missing the clarity the glasses allowed him.His brother was much more important to him, he could just take them off whenever he was around, right?

When he looked back to his brother, though, the air was knocked clean out of his chest.

Staring back at him, his brother was watching him with his usual laid back smile, only now, glasses were perched neatly atop his nasal bone.Without looking away, he felt his now empty pocket, anxiety prickling up the back of his neck.Where was he going with this...?

They stared at each other, seconds feeling like hours, as he waited for his brother to speak his mind.

“how do i look?” He wiggled his brow bones, ignoring the crooked attempt at a smile on his brother’s face. 

“UH.GOOD?” He could barely squeak out anything at all, and the older skeleton started to accept that he wouldn’t get anything more out of his brother.

He took them off, turning them around to clean his reflection in the lens with his sleeve.Taking a deep breath, he pushed himself up and walked around the table.

He could feel his shoulders relax when his brother approached him, but his breath hitched in his throat as he softly placed the glasses back onto their rightful owner.

Holding them up with his own hand, Sans looked into his eyes with that achingly familiar softness only he could.

“there’s my bro.”

He could feel the pressure of tears welling in his sockets.Jumping up and out of the chair, he brought his brother with him, embracing him as tightly as he could.He could feel the arms wrapping around him, holding the back of his head, as he buried his face into the plush hoodie.

“you’re not ever gunna not be the best brother ever, Pap.”

He tried to restrain the tears, but the brief three days he’d had the damn things had provided more stress than he’d needed in a lifetime.The whole world felt wrong when his brother wouldn’t talk to him.

“‘m sorry for freaking you out.”

With a deep, shaky breath, he lowered the shorter skeleton back to the floor.Rubbing a few tears away with the back of his hand, he could feel his brother hold the glasses in his other until he took them.

“It’s nothin’ worth making you cry over.”

The relief was giving way to guilt.His brother might not be the most forthcoming, but he hated keeping things from him, regardless.

“I-I REALLY DON’T NEED-“

“yeah, bro, yeah you do.i’m not gunna get that weird about it again.besides,” he pointed to his own eye sockets, “ _eye_ ’m seeing  more _clearly_ since  _eye_ got some sleep.”

“SANS!!WOULD IT BE SO HARD TO USE EVEN A LITTLE DISCRETION!”His voice was still a little shaky, but he wanted to feel as normal as possible, even if he could’ve excused a few of those terrible jokes.

“you know i gotta be  _transparent_ with you.”He stepped back, allowing his brother to storm towards the living room.

“THIS WAS A TRAP!”

“aw, c’mon, bro, i just wanna see  _eye to eye_ with you.”Trailing after his  ~~brother~~ ~~~~victim, he gathered their mugs on his way out of the kitchen.

“YOU’RE TOO SHORT FOR THAT JOKE TO EVEN WORK!!”

He fell backwards onto the couch, dramatically clapping his hands over his face in anguish, mindful not to poke himself with a stem.After setting the coffee on the end table, Sans took the opportunity to flop down into his lap, waiting to meet his eyes once he stopped pouting.

“didn’t mean to  _blind_ side ya.”

He didn’t get the satisfaction of a reaction that time, the younger of the two keeping his hands over his face in silent contemplation.He could feel his brother playing with the rim of his sweatshirt, the one he realized only now that he’d been wearing since yesterday, and he suddenly couldn’t stop a question from tumbling out.

“CAN YOU USE ORANGE MAGIC?”His hands finally relaxed, but he kept his eyes trained on the ceiling.

His brother stopped.Waiting a moment, he opted to start playing with a newly freed hand instead.

“nope.” If he was lying, there was no tell, “you know someone who can?” 

“ALPHYS SAID MR. ASGORE CAN.”He finally looked back down to the other, finding the same lazy smile he always did.

“sounds pretty cool.you ever see it?

“NO.BUT I BET HE’S REALLY GOOD AT IT.”Whether Sans meant Asgore’s magic or orange in general, it technically wasn’t a lie.

“DO YOU THINK MS. TORIEL CAN USE ORANGE MAGIC?”

His brother shrugged, focusing on the ceiling, “dunno.why don’t you ask?”

“THAT’S A GREAT IDEA!!”

He jostled the other with his excitement, but he didn’t seem to notice. 

“any particular reason you wanna see orange magic so bad?”

“UNDYNE MENTIONED IT, AND I’VE ALREADY SEEN HER GREEN MAGIC!!”He knew his brother could sense he wasn’t being entirely honest, but he also knew that he wouldn’t push.

And sure enough, he didn’t.They stayed like that, peacefully distracted by their own thoughts, until Sans sat back up, yawning.

“as much as i love doing nothing with my  _glassy_ brother, i actually have a couple a’ things i gotta finish today.”He stood into a stretch, letting his arms fall as he turned back to the other, “i’ll just be in my ‘office’.”Gesturing quotations, he turned and ambled out of the room and out of sight.

Things were going so smoothly, he couldn’t find the courage to tell his brother the truth...not yet.Besides!There was no way of knowing if he’d ever even do it again, let alone on purpose!!But asking Toriel about it still wasn’t a bad idea.

Lifting the glasses back to his face, he’d nearly forgotten they were still in his hand.He’d have to fetch the tape from upstairs, but as he stood up, he realized Sans had left his mostly untouched coffee sitting beside the couch.He could take it to him before bothering with the glasses, tucking them neatly into his pocket.He wasn’t particularly feeling up to finishing his own, so he took it back to the kitchen, emptying it down the drain, before following the hall back to the office.

With his hand inches from the doorknob, the sound of his brother’s voice caught him off guard.It was wrong to snoop, but-

“yeah, yeah...i kinda figured.no, i-i don’t think so anyway.”A pause, the other person must be talking.“if it happens again, just let me know, alright?thanks.”

He sounded upset.Clenching his hand away from the door, he found it increasingly difficult to shake the uneasy feeling blossoming in the back of his mind. _No.Why would he be talking about me?_

Biting back the nerves, he barged into the room, in typical Papyrus fashion.Sans glanced up and over the computer without so much as a flinch.

“that didn’t take long.”

”YOU LEFT YOUR COFFEE ON THE TABLE!”Marching over, he set the cup neatly on an uncomfortably sticky coaster, “DON’T THINK I’M ABOUT TO LET YOU START CLUTTERING THE WHOLE HOUSE WITH DISHES AGAIN!!!”

His brother only sat back, amused by the accusation, “i don’t leave dirty dishes in your room.”All signs of the exhausted monster he’d heard only moments ago were gone.

“YES.YOU DO.”Crossing his arms over his chest, he scowled, “YOU LEFT HALF A SANDWICH IN A BOWL ON THE DRESSER LAST WEEK.”

“i was just saving it for  _lumbar_ .”

Letting out a pained sigh, he turned and started back towards the door, hiding the smile he fought back as his brother chuckled at the reaction.

“AT LEAST PUT THE MUG IN THE SINK WHEN YOU’RE DONE!”And with that, he closed the door behind him.

He shouldn’t dwell on the call, he’d only  accidentally overheard the tail end of it, anyway. He didn’t even know who was on the other end!He had no reason to believe it concerned him in the slightest.Instead, he should focus on Ms.Toriel! 

After re-securing the glasses back in place, he decided he would take a walk over to her home.He hadn’t forgotten about the very appealing idea of a party, even if she didn’t know much about orange magic, she could help him plan out a little get together.Maybe Frisk would still be there and they could all do it together!

With a quick change of clothes, and not forgetting to brush his teeth, he clambered back down the stairs and towards the front door, only stopping to tie up his sneakers.

“I’LL BE BACK LATER!!”

Without waiting for a reply he probably wouldn’t get, he hurried out the door and back to the house almost as familiar as his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bono voice “with or WITHOUT Yooouuuu”


	7. To Be Vulnerable is the Bravest Thing of All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Only the fearless may proceed. Brave ones, foolish ones. Both walk not the middle road.”

Everything looked softer under the shadows of the clouds rolling in.The light breeze that carried them felt nice against his back as he let it push him closer to his destination.His thoughts consumed the majority of his attention, leaving less room for distractions.

As the house pulled into view, he noticed an unexpected guest was already there.Sitting neatly beside a bed of vibrant daisies, Asgore tended to the flowers.He hadn’t seen the ex-King of monsters for several weeks, not since their last Monster-Human Diplomat meeting.

It was exciting to work alongside the great monster, even though he insisted on taking the brunt of the work.He shared the job with the ‘goat dad’ after Toriel had insisted that Frisk was too young to be an Ambassador, and needed to focus more on school.They would still attend some events, but it was mostly up to him and Asgore these days.

Trotting through part of the lawn, he stood beside the man working too meticulously to notice.

“GOOD AFTERNOON, MR. ASGORE!”

Nearly dropping his trowel, the monster jumped, looking back over his shoulder. His golden mane looked even more majestic with the aid of glasses.

“Oh!Howdy, Papyrus!”Using a large paw to block out the sun, he squinted, smiling almost as brightly back to the skeleton.

“YOU SHOULD PROBABLY TAKE A BREAK SOON, UNLESS YOU WANT TO GET ALL WET!!”

With a slight chuckle, he examined other parts of the sky, “They didn’t call for rain in the forecast!But you’re right, it’s not looking too good.”

“I’M VERY GOOD AT PREDICTING THINGS!”Pointing a finger up matter-of-factly, a perfectly timed cloud offered them shade again, “THE WEATHER ESPECIALLY!!”

“You’ll have to call me the next time it’s going to-“ the words caught in his throat as he pulled his gaze back to the other.Eyes wide, looking like he’d just been told a dark secret or something, Asgore clenched the tool in his hand.

“WHAT...WHAT’S THE MATTER?”Checking briefly back over his shoulder, he found nothing out of the ordinary.  “YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’VE SEEN A GHOST!”He tried to laugh but it came out meek and nervous.

Reorienting himself, the gardener shook his head, “My apologies.I just...remembered something, that’s all.”His smile wasn’t particularly convincing.

“Papyrus?”Before he could reply, a new voice surprised both of them.

Turning around completely, he was greeted by a warm smile, “HELLO, MISS TORIEL!!”

“It’s nice to see you, dear,” she was holding a drink in one hand, that she motioned to, “I just made some iced tea if you’d like some.”

Beads of condensation reflected the colors of the tea made pale by the ice.It was like a drink prism!She carried it the rest of the way to Asgore, who thanked her bashfully.

“NO, THANK YOU,” without thinking, he motioned to his torso, “IT GOES RIGHT THROUGH ME!NYEH HEH HEH!!”

Caught off guard, her eyes went wide before she started laughing.He even got another chuckle out of Asgore.

Shaking his head like he could shake the joke away, he scowled, “THAT WAS TERRIBLE, I DON’T KNOW WHAT CAME OVER ME.”There was no chance she hadn’t heard that from Sans a thousand times, so he didn’t even know why she thought it was so funny.

Wiping a tear from her eye, Toriel rested a hand on his shoulder, “Perhaps it comes with age.”

“IT BETTER NOT.”

She giggled at that, turning to walk back towards the house, “Are you stopping in for a little while?”

“YES!!I ACTUALLY HAVE A PRESSING MATTER TO DISCUSS!”

“Pressing?”Asgore chimed in, almost hesitantly.“I don’t mean to interject, but is everything alright?”

“ABSOLUTELY!!”He tried very hard to keep his voice from cracking, forcing himself to relax before continuing, “JUST PRESSING TO ME.”

He couldn’t tell if his tone was level enough, but neither boss monster seemed to catch on, Asgore offering a reassuring smile before turning back to the gardening.

Following Toriel back inside, she gestured for him to go ahead to the living room.It was such a peaceful space; photos and old trinkets sprinkled tastefully around, a very soft-looking throw lounged on a chair in the corner, a wall of bookshelves, housing all manner of literature.It suited her perfectly.

He was a little disappointed to have missed Frisk before they returned to their human parents’ house for the week, but he was partially relieved.He would be able to talk about the whole magic situation as soon as possible, and it was really starting to bother him.

She returned with a glass of iced tea and something draped over her arm.Resting them both on an end table, she sat on the couch, patting it invitingly.

Once he sat on the other side, she lifted what he then noticed to be a t-shirt and offered him to take it.It was black, with a singular bone on the front.

“When we were out the other day, Frisk insisted we buy this for your brother,“ she chuckled as she motioned for him to flip it over, “I can’t say I put up much of a fight.”

‘I find this shirt humerus’ was printed across the back.

Sighing, he hung his head in defeat.Shooting her a look, she couldn’t stop herself from snickering.

“IT IS VERY BOLD OF YOU TO ASSUME IT WILL GET TO HIM NOW.”

She returned the sarcastic look tenfold, “Now I know you would not break Frisk’s heart like that.”

Begrudgingly, he rolled the shirt back up and slipped it into his backpack.  He couldn’t shake the apprehension growing in his chest.  Why did talking about this feel so difficult?

“Now,” taking a sip from her tea, she focused back on him, “about your ‘pressing matter’,” she nodded her go ahead.

“RIGHT...” shifting his gaze out the window across the room, he found his nerves almost choking, “IT’S, UM,” he clasped his hands together, glancing down at them before finally returning his eyes to her, “CAN YOU USE ORANGE MAGIC?”

She watched him for a moment, smile falling.

“I...do not use color magic, no.”Looking more concerned by the second, she stacked her hands slowly in her lap, “May I ask why you wanted to know?”

A flicker of her eyes to the doorway was enough to tell that she was worried this involved Asgore, so he couldn’t bring him into this.

Weighing his options, he toyed with the hem of his shorts, before finally taking a deeper breath and focusing back on her.

“CAN I TELL YOU A SECRET?”

Her eyes locked onto his, a shadow crossed her face.Or maybe it didn’t.Was he seeing things?She looked...like she was somewhere else.

“Papyrus,” her expression softened as she leaned back slightly, “secrets can be very dangerous.”

Normally, she didn’t get this serious with him, so she must think something bad happened.

“I-I KNOW!ACTUALLY,” he shifted uncomfortably under her intense gaze, “UNDYNE AND ALPHYS ALREADY KNOW.I JUST...DIDN’T WANT TO TELL SANS YET.”

That seemed to comfort her somewhat, was that even a hint of curiosity in her eyes?

“But you plan on telling him, yes?”

“YES!”Maybe.At this point, he’d say anything to get her to stop looking at him like that.

“Very well.You have my word, I will not gossip.”Her posture relaxed, she even took another sip of her tea before a smile returned to her face.

The tension in the air eased, but in his chest, remained taut.

“I ACCIDENTALLY USED ORANGE MAGIC.”He watched her carefully, waiting for something more than the mildly surprised expression she had now.

“Is that what’s been bothering you?”She tilted her head like she was legitimately not understanding.

“YES!IT WAS A TOTAL ACCIDENT!!  IT’S NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE!  SANS SAID HE CAN’T EVEN USE IT!!  I WAS SPARRING WITH UNDYNE AND SHE SAID IT WAS AWESOME BUT IT JUST FELT SCARY!!I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT DOES!!!I MEAN, I’VE ALWAYS BEEN SO EXTRA CAREFUL ABOUT MAGIC, BECAUSE-“ he cut himself off, but not quickly enough for Toriel to not have already put the pieces together.

“Of Sans...” she finished, her voice lower.“I think I understand, now.”

He...honestly hadn’t been able to put his finger on it until right now.It felt wrong to feel so relieved about something so bad. 

When he found the nerve to look at her again, she’d slid closer.Resting her hand over his, she offered a sympathetic smile.

“It’s okay to be scared of things, my friend.Especially magic.” she took both of his hands into hers, it almost felt like she was pulling him back down to the surface, “But you are a strong monster, you will control it soon enough.Do you know where orange magic comes from?”

He shook his head.

“It comes from bravery.”

He could feel himself mirroring her smile now, squeezing her hands with his own.A tremendous weight slowly lifting off his shoulders.

“THANK YOU, TORIEL.”

Leaning in for a hug, there was something else lingering in the back of his mind.It felt foreign, and distracted him for the tender moment.But whatever it was did not seem to bother her, so he ignored it.

Once they pulled back, she met him with her more cheerful, usual smile.

“If you would like to talk to someone who can use it, Asgore might be able to help you.” 

“I’LL ASK HIM LATER.”

With an encouraging smile, Toriel shifted back to her previous seat.

“If that is all that’s been on your mind, I was actually planning on doing a little baking today, if you’d like to stay and help.”

“I’VE SET YOUR KITCHEN ON FIRE MULTIPLE TIMES.”The strange feeling ebbed further away.

“This I know, but I’ve been meaning to get some fresh curtains anyway!”

After a minute of consideration, he figured he didn’t have any other plans for the day, “THAT WOULD BE FUN!”

“Excellent.”Standing, she stepped to the bookcase, kneeling as she looked over a specific section, “I’ve been thinking of trying something new, lets find something interesting.”

Upon her return, she had a few recipe books.Setting them on the table, they began sorting through them together.That weird feeling was now easily forgotten.

 

* * *

 

  The glow of the screen seemed brighter as the sun rose too high to shine through the window.  He wasn’t sure how long he’d sat there, sifting through files, both digital and physical, but he was starting to get stiff.  The only break he’d taken was to retrieve more boxes from the attic, but he had no intention of taking another one until he found  something .

Or until the sound of someone banging on their door startled him into action.

Rolling his shoulders, he got up and dragged himself out of the room.He wasn’t fast enough, though, as a violent crash prompted him to hurry into the entryway, finding a kicked in door and an out of breath, visibly distressed Undyne.

The door thing wasn’t unusual, but she was rarely this shaken up.

“can i hel-“

“WHERE’S PAPYRUS?”

He went cold.

“he went to Tori’s, why?”

Her shoulders dropped, scowl dissipating into worry, “He’s not answering his phone.”

Without another word, they both ran out the door.This was a very, very bad sign.The neighborhood was safe, for the most part, but if some anti-monster terrorists went looking for a target, his brother would be a very easy one.

They’d gone over self defense, he’d made Papyrus swear he would use it if he was attacked, but that definitely didn’t mean he would.What if he didn’t even have the chance?

Terrible scenarios cluttered his mind, when he was suddenly jostled back to reality by hands under his arms.Undyne picked him up, tilting into a full on sprint with him under arm.He would’ve protested, but she was right, he was too slow for her, and he couldn’t just take a short cut right in front of her.

Within minutes, they were there, Undyne dropping him to his feet as she slammed the door open.He couldn’t make out what Toriel said, her voice mumbled by the white noise filling his head as they rushed into the living room.

Toriel was on her feet in an instant.Blue bones in both hands, Papyrus stood defensively in front of her, but at the reveal of their invaders, he dismissed them.

“UNDYNE??SANS???”

“What is going on?”

Before either of them could catch their breath, Undyne lunged forward, tackling the skeleton to the ground.

“YOU JERK!!I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!!!”She stopped punching him to pull him up into a gruff hug.

“Why on Earth would you think that?”Toriel looked back to him with concern, but he couldn’t take his eyes off his deeply confused brother.

Dropping her head to his chest, Undyne let her lungs catch up while Papyrus rested a comforting hand on her back.

His legs started to quiver, the shock catching up with him, so he leaned into the doorway, watching them with tired eyes.

While the two confused monsters awaited an explanation, things settled, and Undyne finally pushed herselfup and off his brother, pulling him up with her.

“This stupid idiot wouldn’t answer his phone!”

“MY-“ feverishly patting his pockets, he quickly retrieved the small device.His brows knitted together as he tapped it, “THE BATTERY...” he seemed sincerely distraught as he looked back to her, “I DIDN’T REALIZE!I’M SORRY.”He tilted his head to look around her and at his brother..

“it’s okay, bro,” his legs were steady again as he stepped further into the room, “i shoulda’ just called tori.”

“I didn’t even give him the chance to...”Looking back to Toriel, Undyne crossed her arms, “sorry about storming the castle.”

Sighing with a mixture of relief and exasperation, Toriel smiled, “You were merely concerned for your friend.” 

He chuckled at her strained understanding as he glanced back out to the front door.Overall, it seemed fine.

“i gotta put a new lock on our door, too.mine as well do yours, while i’m at it.”

Slipping back into his usual nonchalant self, no one really seemed to notice just how panicked he’d been when they’d arrived. 

“I would greatly appreciate that.Thank you, Sans.”

When he looked back into the room, he was greeted by her smile, but before he could respond, Papyrus interrupted.

  “YOU’RE HERE NOW, THOUGH, SO I DON’T NEED MY PHONE!”

“Oh, right!  I almost forgot!” all eyes were on him again, “Alphys has the lab ready for the sleep thing, we can do it tonight!”

“NYEH!RIGHT!THE, UH, THE-“

“what ‘sleep thing’?”

His brother seemed very nervous, all of a sudden, eyes darting around to anything that wasn’t someone else.

“IT’S NOTHING!!JUST A SLEEP THING!!!”

“i picked up on that.”

“It’s really not a big deal, he’s just gunna spend the night at our place.”Undyne offered a halfway smile, but he couldn’t help feeling annoyed.Was Papyrus really keeping multiple secrets from him?

“In the lab.Being studied like some kind of test subject or something?”His voice rose as he stepped towards her, against his best efforts to stop.

“That is _not_ what I said.”She stepped towards him.

“Sounded pretty straightforward to me.”  The room was getting smaller by the second.

“STOP!!”Papyrus pushed himself between them, facing Undyne, he kept a hand between him and his brother, like a buffer, “I JUST FORGOT TO MENTION IT!THAT’S ALL!!!”

“Now might be the best time for an explanation.”Everyone looked back to Toriel, who’d crossed her arms.She looked sternly to Papyrus, but there was something in her eyes that made him feel even worse.Just how much was he hiding?

“RIGHT.”Stepping back so he could address both irate monsters, the taller skeleton looked sheepishly to his brother, “WHEN I FELL ASLEEP AT UNDYNE’S HOUSE THE OTHER NIGHT, IT BECAME CLEAR TO THEM THAT I DON’T NEED AS MUCH SLEEP AS OTHER MONSTERS.”

He did his best to smile, shifting closer, “THEY JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT’S NORMAL.”His gaze fell again, as did his smile, “I REALLY DID JUST FORGET ABOUT IT.”

  Casting one last scrutinizing glance at Undyne, he turned to his brother. Guilt weighed on him as he realized how much stressed he’d been putting him under.

“it’s okay, bro, it’s...been a busy weekend.”When he rested a hand on his brother’s, he earned a grateful smile.But when he looked back to Undyne, she was looking to Toriel with an unsettlingly worried expression.

“hey,” he regained her attention, “no hard feelings?”

She glanced to Papyrus, who was giving her puppy dog eyes, before rolling her own.

“Yeah.Whatever.”A menacing smile spread across her face, “but if you ever accuse me again, I’ll kick your ass.”

Papyrus seemed happy enough with that result, as he pulled them both in for a hug.He could hear Toriel chuckle at the awkward trio.

Once Papyrus finally released them, he looked back to her, “CAN SANS STAY WHILE WE BAKE??”

The intensity in her eyes from earlier was gone as she smiled warmly at them, “That is up to him, but you are all always welcome here.”

As much as he wanted to get back to his research, the hopeful smile on his brother’s face wasn’t something he could just dismiss.

“yeah, sure.s’fine with me.”

“I WILL TRY TWICE AS HARD NOT TO SET ANYTHING ON FIRE!!!”  Despite the tension from only moments ago, the goofy monster really did seem happy as ever.

Undyne laughed at that, “Thought I was the only one who had that honor!”

“Oh no, dear, he’s even managed to light the batter itself.”Everyone else laughed, but he could feel his thoughts drifting...

“Hey, Pap, are you sure you can’t do fire magic, too?”

“MAYBE I CAN!!THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAN ACHIEVE ANYTHING!!!”

Their voices sounded further...he could see them all laughing and smiling, but he found his focus on his brother.More specifically, those glasses.

He contributed a laugh or two, a joke about his brother being a real hot shot.He could feel the lazy smile plastered on his face.But he didn’t feel like he really was there.

And for the first time...

Neither did Papyrus.


	8. A Burden Shared Is A Burden Halved

The sky was deep shades of grey and purple.Rain closer to a mist made everything shine in the overcast light.The sun was nearly set by the time they were leaving.

After Undyne left for an appointment with a client, Sans napped in the kitchen while he helped Toriel.They only set the kitchen on fire a little bit, and he barely felt responsible.Maybe she just needed a new oven.

Asgore hadn’t thought much of Undyne breaking the door earlier, he’d thought she was just there for a visit.Understandably, she did that fairly often.He’d come in to tell Toriel he’d finished up with the front yard, and he’d try to get to the backyard later that week.Papyrus had asked him to wait until they finished, but he “didn’t want to invite himself”.He always got so weird around Toriel.

Maybe it was her glasses that bothered him.

What is it with monsters and glasses?

Didn’t he have glasses?

Toriel waved them off as they headed out into the rain.She’d offered them an umbrella, but they didn’t have fur, so water didn’t bother them as much.  Except, he hadn’t taken his glasses into account.

As they got to the end of the block, he quickly undid the tape and slid the foggy pair into his pocket.His brother smiled at him, waiting patiently before they crossed the street.No one was really out tonight, Sunday’s were usually quieter, for whatever reason.

They walked mostly in silence; content, but almost weary in nature.He could tell his brother wanted to talk about earlier, but he himself was feeling reluctant to bring it up.

It was a little disappointing not being able to watch the sky with his glasses on, it looked very nice with all the big, soft clouds.He could picture it well enough with the colors and shapes still visible.

He started counting the houses that they passed across the street, starting over with each new block, when he felt his brother’s hand bump his.Pulling his attention back to the other, he smiled, ignoring the uncertainty in the smile that was returned to him.

“if you don’t wanna do that sleep thing, you know you don’t have to, right?”

Watching him for a moment, he was appreciative of the comfort, but...he didn’t want to make Undyne mad at him.

“YES, I KNOW.”He turned his gaze back to the path ahead of them, “I DON’T MIND.THEY JUST WANT ME TO PROVE WHAT I ALREADY KNOW!”

He could still feel the tension in the air, like there was something else...but whatever it was, his brother wouldn’t say.

Instead, he too looked back to the sidewalk.

“did ya get to ask Tori about orange magic?”

  Sincere excitement fueled his smile as he returned his gaze to the other, “YES!SHE SAID SHE DOESN’T USE COLOR MAGIC, SO I WOULD HAVE TO ASK ASGORE, BUT I KNOW HE DOESN’T LIKE MAGIC SO I PROBABLY WON’T.”

“heh, _orange_ you glad you asked her though?”

“YOU ONLY BROUGHT THIS UP TO MAKE THAT JOKE DIDN’T YOU.”He glared at the shorter skeleton, who offered a shrug.

“ _color me_ predictable.”

He tried restrain a smile from working its way to his face, “WOULD YOU STOP ALREADY!”

“but, bro, aren’t you _tickled pink_ by my jokes?”

“OH MY GOD!!”He started walking faster, unwilling to deal with the embarrassment of his brother seeing his partial smile.

After Sans got a good chuckle out of the reaction, all the same, he picked up his pace enough to catch up.

“thought you might be feelin’ a little bit _sweeter_ after all that baking.”

“I THINK THOSE WERE PROBABLY THE BEST CUPCAKES EVER.”Opting to _glaze_ over the jokes (he could not believe he just thought that), they had turned out much better than usual.Which meant they had to be perfect.

“probably.i think baking might really be your thing.”  The shift in tone took him by surprise, his brother’s voice softer now, “you really like it, huh?”

“NYEH!THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAN OVERCOME ANY CHALLENGE!MASTER ANY SKILL!!!”Puffing his chest out to he struck a heroic pose, “I WILL BECOME A VERY HIGHLY REGARDED CHEF AND BAKER!!” It dawned on him, that wasn’t really something he wanted to do, “OR, I COULD!!! IF I WANTED TO!”

“heh, yeah, yer right.you can do anything.”

When he looked to his brother, that bittersweet smile he wore like a mask sobered the mood of the imbalanced conversation.

  It was as common as ever to find him like this.  

  He kept telling himself that Sans would start to understand.He’d start to get better.The longer they were on the surface, the more his hope would come back.Might come back.In two years, almost nothing had changed.Did anyone else notice?Would things always be like this?

“BROTHER,” he started walking again, their block just across one more street, “YOU’RE-UM, YOU LIKE SCIENCE-Y STUFF, CORRECT?”

Watching him for a moment, the older skeleton quirked a brow as he followed, “i guess you could call me a _bone-afide_ fan.”

Pressing his temples, he unheard that before he continued.

“THEN YOU SHOULD COME TO THE SLEEP THING!”

His brother looked genuinely shocked, which felt worse than he expected it to.They stopped, accidentally, yet conveniently, on the sidewalk in front of their house.

“oh, uh, yeah...if ya want me there.”His smile was sincere but that did not stop his words from digging the metaphorical blade deeper.

In a moment free of thought, the words fell from his mouth before he could think of a better response, “OF COURSE I DO...”

He realized too late that the words sounded as small as he felt.He screwed his face back up into a smile, standing tall, but he knew it was too little too late.

His brother tried to comfort him by pretending he hadn’t noticed, as he rubbed the back of his neck.With a longing gaze at the busted front door he had presumably slammed shut in his earlier escapade with Undyne.  His shoulders dropped.

“if we’re gunna head over soon,” he threw one of his usual, more relaxed smiles back at his brother, “would ya mind giving me a lift?  i’ve done more cardio today than my nonexistent heart can bear.”

“I SHALL TAKE YOUR LAZINESS AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO EXERCISE!NYEH HEH HEH!!” Marching straight toward the porch, he pulled his phone out, “BUT I NEED TO GET MY PHONE CHARGING STRING FIRST!”

“maybe some _bone_ dry clothes, too.”He heard his brother walk up less enthusiastically behind him, and shot him a glare as he carefully started wrestling the door open without causing more damage.

“AND MAYBE SOME BETTER JOKES.”

“no need to be so _sternum_ -“

“YOU-“ the door giving way, he turned and pointed a disapproving finger at the other when something stopped him.

A loud noise, staticky and unintelligible,  drowned out his thoughts.He found himself feeling confused, liked he’d jumped several minutes into the future and back with no memory of it.

They stared at each other, Sans’ facing shifting from amused to confused as his brother’s scowl slowly dissipated.

“hey, uh, paps?you feelin’ okay?”

Stepping back, he clenched and unclenched his hands, listening carefully as the unsettling hum died out.

“DID YOU...DO YOU HEAR THAT?”

  Stepping back slighting, the other skeleton turned his head slowly to survey the yard, as if someone nearby had caused whatever that was.

“you know, pap, sometimes you’re more like a dog than a skeleton.”  As much as he tried to play this off, it was clear he felt uneasy about the question.

Forcing a slight chuckle, he straightened back up, opting to forgo any investigation.

“I’LL BE RIGHT BACK!”Rushing to  and up the stairs, he easily overlooked the odd happening.

Undyne had said nine earlier, and it was almost nine now.But he knew it was a casual nine.Still, he’d rather get this over with sooner rather than later.  And there was a good possibility it would take a while to get tired enough to sleep.The more he thought of it, the more anxiety welled in his chest.

Almost on autopilot, he changed into more sleep appropriate attire and cleaned his glasses.After they were taped back up, he threw a few things out from his backpack and grabbed whatever clothes were at the top of the drawer.A rubix cube, a notebook, and a few colored pencils followed.

Pulling himself from his thoughts, he hurried back downstairs and headed straight to the office.That’s where all the books were, and if there was one thing that helped him sleep under any circumstances, it was a good book.

He noticed the sun had fully set, and the house was finally dark, but the rainy sky cast a muted purple glow over everything.It reminded him of the Underground.

Stuffing the last thing in, he made his way back to the living room, where his brother was strewn across the couch, watching a television that wasn’t on.

“you ready?”

“DID YOU EVEN CHANGE?”

“a little rain won’t _break my bones_.”He seemed sincere in his casualness, but he rarely stared at a blank tv unless something was bothering him.

“YES BUT I DID AND I HAVE TO CARRY YOU.”

Finally earning a glance from the older skeleton, he sighed with a smile, “fair enough.”

Dragging himself off the couch, with a flash of blue light, he was gone.The stairs were literally ten feet away, but it wasn’t a surprise.Maybe Sans should just move his bedroom downstairs.

Examining the room, he noticed an empty bag of chips, most likely from a few days ago...but it sparked the realization that he hadn’t made dinner!

  It would be rude to be too late, but he couldn’t let his brother go skipping meals again.   Hurrying to the kitchen, he threw together a sandwich, regrettably knowing the other would make the same joke he always did. It never was, and never will be, a sanswhich.  That implies that it would be made out of him, which was even more unsettling than such a bad joke.

  The thought of eating turned his metaphorical stomach, so he opted out of making one for himself.

  With almost perfect timing, the sound of steps in the hallway approached as he threw the remaining ingredients back into the fridge.

“pap?”Sticking his head through the doorway, his brother  looked curiously into the dim kitchen.

“I CAN’T BELIEVE THAT I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WOULD BE SO CARELESS AS TO FORGET TO MAKE DINNER!!”

His brother chuckled as he was handed a plate and guided to the table.

“‘m fine, bro, really.what about you?”He pushed it aside gently as he sat down, looking back to the other with a vaguely worried expression.

“WELL, I’M SUPPOSED TO BE SLEEPING SOON, AND YOU CAN’T SLEEP ON A FULL STOMACH!”

“good thing we don’t have those, huh?”

He felt a mild embarrassment at the scrutiny.  It was like being treated as a child...but the reminder of the halcyon days of being a baby brother was oddly comforting.

Conceding to the silence, Sans got up and walked over to the utensil drawer.It was too dark to see what he’d returned with, but it become apparent as he started fussing the the sandwich.

Pushing the plate to the center of the table, he’d cut it diagonally, “you  _half_ to eat something.”

Torn between being touched, and reprimanding him for that joke, it was his turn to surrender.

It felt like an hour had passed in the time before they finally finished the one, small meal, but it was a tranquil silence that found them.He felt considerably less worried as they made their way to the front door.

Checking the clock in the living room, it was almost 9:30.Once he’d secured the door, he handed off his backpack and hoisted his brother onto his back, starting down the sidewalk.After he got the umbrella up, he asked his brother to send Undyne a text to let her know he hadn’t forgotten, which he managed to do before falling asleep.

  And for as nervous as he’d felt earlier, it was ten times easier knowing Sans would be there now.The easy, rhythmic patter of the rain didn’t hurt, either.


	9. A Long, Dark Stairwell

The weight of the rain had grown heavy by the time they closed in on their destination.He was glad to have decided on shorts, but the elbows of his sleeves, however, were soaked from how he held his brother’s legs.It was warm, so they should dry quickly enough once indoors.

His thoughts were few and far between as he focused on the cool breeze and the comfortable weight on his back.He almost even overshot their friends’ house, but the instinct of habit had him slowing to a stop at the correct walkway .

He didn’t even need to knock as Undyne pulled the door open at their approach, hustling them in excitedly.

“It’s pouring out there!Never gets old!!”Her smile widened as she took in the sight of the ceaselessly astounding surface weather before she pulled back in and shut the door.

Almost synchronously shutting the umbrella, he tapped it a few times while setting it beside the doorway.

“How’d you stay so dry?” 

“I WAS AVOIDING MANY RAINDROPS.YOU GET SICK IF YOU GO TO SLEEP WET!!”

“Oh, well in that case,” she moved around them, “you did a pretty crappy job!”

“OR MAYBE I DIDN’T WANT TO DODGE ALL OF THEM!”He trotted happily after her as she lead them down the hall.

“Gotta admit, I was surprised when Sans texted me.Thought you two were still in a...” she rolled her hand like that would help her find the right word, but he knew exactly what she meant.

“NYEH, YES, WELL, YOU KNOW!WE CAN’T STAY MAD AT EACH OTHER FOREVER!” 

The smile she gave him was almost sympathetic, which felt a little strange.She never really could understand their relationship...but she respected it, and that was just one of the many great things about her!!

The hallway drew to an end at a stairwell, his attention shifting back to the situation.He knew these stairs went down to Alphys’ lab, but he’d never seen it, not even after they finished installing it and threw a party.He never missed a party.

That tenuous feeling was creeping up his spine again.

Undyne’s voice startled him out of his thoughts, but not quickly enough to prevent him from missing the first part of what she’d said, “-I guess she would, right?”

“NYES, OF COURSE!”

She stopped, glancing back to him.She made him feel even more see-through than a skeleton already is.

“Pap, you don’t have anything to worry about, seriously.“

She clasped the side of his arm firmly, a determined smile on her face, “I wouldn’t let anything happen.”

What did he even expect to happen?Why was he so nervous?

“I KNOW!! I JUST...GOT ATTACKED BY A LAB ONE TIME.DOGS AND SKELETONS DO NOT GET ALONG!” his voice was slightly higher as he moved around her to expedite the trip, “BUT YOU’RE RIGHT!!I’M BEING RIDICULOUS!!!”

He heard her huff her frustration as she followed down the stairs, but that answer would have to be good enough for now.

It was further down than he’d expected, the distance between them growing with the silence.Her eyes on the back of his head pressured him like a hot kettle, he almost felt like he could scream.

“These stairs always remind me of that scary movie I made you watch that time, remember?”She chuckled as she skipped a few steps to catch up, her voice breaking down some of the tension, “You couldn’t look at a TV for weeks after that!”

Her attempt to lighten the mood turned fruitful as she earned a scoff from him.Any distraction was a good one.

“I WAS JUST HUMORING YOU!!”

“guess it was pretty  _humerus_.”

Undyne wheezed as Papyrus stopped, remorselessly dropping his brother off his back and onto the stairs.

“OF COURSE YOU’D WAKE UP IN TIME TO MAKE THAT AWFUL JOKE.”

“aw c’mon, bro-“ Undyne cleared his brother in a single bound as she finally caught back up with him.He did his best to blatantly ignore the older skeleton as they reached the bottom of the stairwell.

“WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THAT NONSENSE.” Letting his friend take the lead again, he marched after her.

She lead him to a large, open room, one that honestly didn’t look too dissimilar to the “true” lab in the Underground.Much more open.Computer consoles and screens covered the closest wall, while a few machines and contraptions filled up the body of the room.The lazybones caught up easily once they’d stopped.

“HEY, BABE, WE’RE HERE!”Undyne’s voice echoed through the cavernous space, summoning the intended monster.

“O-oh, hello!”Alphys scurried out of a separate room on the far left side, pleasantly surprised when her eyes wondered to their newest addition, “I didn’t know you’d be coming, too, Sans!”

“me and my brother are a two for one, what can i tell ya.”

Nodding a greeting, the anxious scientist turned her attention back to the taller of the skeletons, motioning for him to follow.

“I have all the m-monitors set up in room 3.”, they crossed the main room to one parallel the side  she had been at upon their arrival.

The high pitched buzz of several machines working in unison were a little off putting, but after the incident earlier, he wasn’t sure anyone else could even hear it.The look on Undyne’s face sure made it feel like she could.

The ‘bed’ was mostly just a lab table with padding, the machine beside it laden with cords and wires he presumed would be attached to him.It wasn’t exactly a welcoming sight, but Alphys wasted no time in scurrying over to the device and carefully separating each group of wires appropriately.

With one last uncertain glance back to his brother, he received three thumbs up from both monsters lingering by the doorway, encouraging him to step closer to the machine.

“Okay...um, okay.This goes around your chest-“ he knelt down, almost like he was being knighted, to allow her to apply the clusters of wires where necessary.Experience guided her steady hands as she stuck several under his shirt, to his head, and around his arms. 

The sound wasn’t any louder despite how close he was to the machine, but it managed to drown out most of his thoughts anyway, leaving just enough room for the raw anxiety of the situation to sit at the top of his chest, threatening to strangle him.Even with how fast she worked, it felt like he’d been still for hours when she finally told him she’d finished.

“Now, y-you just lay down and...well, go to sleep!”The scientist could be quite worrisome at times, but even she seemed confident in the procedure.

“I DIDN’T REALIZE THIS WOULD INVOLVE SO MANY STICKERS.”She giggled softly as he moved carefully around her and to the ‘bed’.Mindful of the wires, he assumed a restful position.At least it was comfier than it looked.More so than their old couch...

It was difficult to get properly comfortable with the concern of messing up the scientist’s work, distracted by the shifting of his friends’ feet.They were probably leaving, except...he didn’t need to move to know his brother had instead joined him, standing beside the table.

“i can’t really stay...al says i could hamper the ‘sleeping process’,” he definitely used air quotes.A hand rested on his own, “so i’m just gonna be with them.  the room’s a _bones_ throw away, ‘kay?”

He nodded curtly, still weary to do something that might drag this out further.

“heh, you can talk, pap, it’s not even on yet.”His brother’s voice grew quieter.

There was a hesitation, like Sans hoped he might say something in return, but the silence said enough.

“okay.i’ll just-“

“Sans?”Alphys could hear him, regardless of how quiet his voice was, but...it had been a while...almost since they got to the surface.He couldn’t remember why they stopped, why he stopped, but there was almost certainly no other way he’d get to sleep any time soon...

“I...I brought a book.If you don’t mind...”he dared to lift his head a few inches, craning his neck to find the other smiling back at him.

“yeah, of course, bro.”There almost seemed to be relief in his voice.

It only took a minute for the older skeleton to retrieve the book from the backpack that was honorarily his for the night. Laying his head back down, he listened as his brother made his way to the other side of the table, climbing up to lay beside him.

“‘earth and space’, huh?”

“I thought you might like it, too.”

“it’s no fluffy bunny, but...” there was no teasing in his voice, just that melancholy softness.

“any recommendations?”

“Does it explain what exactly a ‘dipper’ is and why there are two of them?”

“heh, lets find out.” 

 

* * *

 

 “‘...is high in nitrogen...which is why...’” he was barely speaking above a whisper.So quietly that he could hear the soft, slow breaths of his brother, which was a sure sign of  how conscious he was by now.

He had to admit, he was on the verge of nodding off, too, but Alphys would be annoyed if he didn’t ‘follow protocol’.  With one last glance at his brother, he realized he’d forgotten to take off his glasses.  With nimble fingers, he carefully undid the tape and removed the pair, slipping them into his pocket for safe keeping.

  Sliding off the table as silent as a shadow, he ambled out of the small room.The lab was...nice.But it held an eerie presence.Of course, he knew there were cameras everywhere, which was logically the explanation for the uneasy feeling of being watched...t hen again, his instincts weren’t usually wrong.

He took his sweet time meandering across the main lab to the room where Alphys and Undyne were, eventually interrupting their comical argument about anime or whatever.

“Hey!Were you reading to him?”When Undyne’s eyes met his, the question felt less critical and more sincerely curious.

“well, you know how hard it is to read without any eyeballs.”

“Sans you don’t have literal eyeballs, either.”

Offering a shrug to the exasperated scientist, he turned back to the other monster, very much aware of the weight of their earlier encounter on her mind.Lately, she’d been acting weird around him, too.

Alphys picked up on the tentative silence, eyes flicking uncomfortably back and forth between the two.

“Um, d-does anyone want some water...?Or tea?”She adjusted her glasses as both parties focused back on her.

“‘m good.”

“Yeah, same here...but thanks.”Undyne’s gaze was soft as she comforted her girlfriend with a squeeze of her hand.It worked well enough to diffuse the tension for the time being.

Sitting across from them at the circular table, he glanced at the screens beside them, transmitting images of his brother alongside the monitor readings.He didn’t expect anything to come from this, but it didn’t stop that feeling of dread from pulling at the edge of every thought.

He didn’t like his brother being forced into a lab experiment.But this wasn’t an experiment.It was a test.And he’d just have to keep reminding himself of that.

After a while, the partners resumed their conversation, more mild mannered than before.Alphys told Undyne she could go take a nap, but she refused.None of them seemed tired anymore.

After the events of earlier, they were all a little high strung.But all he could think about was that look on Undyne’s face.The way she look so fearfully at Toriel.What had he missed?What did she know?

An hour passed before he decided to take initiative, but the other beat him to the punch.

“Hey, Sans?”

He was already getting to his feet when the taller monster caught his attention.

“Can we talk?”

The furrow of her brows was enough to assure him that it was worse than he’d initially thought.Which was saying a lot.They both watched him for a second, but his casual demeanor did not waver.

“yeah, sure thing.”

Alphys wrung her hands as they both moved to leave the room, looking after them with her usual concern.Of course, she probably didn’t want to be left alone, but it was obvious to anyone at this point, that something else was seriously up.

Following her, their surroundings slowly muted.All his focus was on her, like that would somehow enable him to read her mind.She was too distracted by her own thoughts to notice as she lead him back to the hallway between the stairwell and the entrance.

Turning, she fell back against the wall, crossing her arms as she watched the ceiling.Undyne wasn’t one to reserve her opinion, but she knew how impactful a few words could be. 

He knew better, but a part of him hoped this wasn’t about his brother.

She threw a curveball when she startled him with a loud, frustrated groan as she clapped her hands over her face.

“WHY CAN’T YOU AND YOUR DUMB BROTHER EVER JUST BE HONEST ABOUT ANYTHING??”

She kept her yell lower than usual, mindful not to interfere with the experiment.

_*test._

“i guess you could blame it on the _fib_ ulas-“

“SANS!” She pushed herself off the wall, grabbing his shoulders, “CAN’T YOU BE SERIOUS FOR FIVE MINUTES???”

The lights of his eyes unintentionally flickered, her grip on him loosening.She pulled back, averting her visible eye again.

“Look.I’m just, a little freaked out.Papyrus has been acting...really weird.”

Shifting back against the wall, she slid down into a sitting position.She was tall enough that they were almost eye to eye.Well.Eye to shoulder.

“you wanna throw me a bone or do i have to guess?”The likelihood was, she didn’t want to betray the trust of her friend...but it was becoming apparent this was a bigger situation than either of them initially thought.

She rolled her shoulders with a sigh before finally glancing back up to him.

“Has he ever used orange magic before?”

He’d already talked to Alphys about this.Called her first thing yesterday.Or was that just earlier today?She had confirmed his suspicion, but the fact the whole thing was sticking out so badly to everyone couldn’t be good.

The internal struggle of being truthful, against keeping as much possible about their past hidden was a difficult balancing act.He didn’t want to initiate anything that might provoke a reset...but that particular can of worms was becoming too punctured to be considered unopened.

“that happened?”He feigned mild surprise, and it either worked, or she didn’t care to press.It was obvious she really needed to get this off her chest.

  “Shit.  He didn’t tell you...?”  Rubbing her eye, she shook her head softly, “I thought it was cool, ya know!It was badass!But...it mostly just seemed to freak him out.”She shifted forward, pulling her knees to her chest, “Mr. ‘I’m the best at everything all the time’ was upset about learning he could use two kinds of magic?That doesn’t add up.  And he didn’t even brag about it to you??”

Leaning back against the wall beside her, he listened attentively as she recounted the exact incident.The tears, the jokes, the sparring, the laughter, having a good time...then, out of nowhere, the uncertainty.The humbleness.It was so disjointed.

“And then all the stuff with the sleep thing.He was scared.Like, scared scared.”She hugged her legs closer as she looked back to him, “He thought I wanted him to go back to the lab Underground.”

Okay...that was unexpected.

“...back to the true lab?”

She nodded.Why would he think...he knows about this lab so why...?

“At first...I though he was still a little off from fighting with you, but when he said that-“

“he said we fought?”

She stumbled, slightly, backtracking her words as she held the back of her neck, “not...in those words.He said you freaked out about the glasses, for whatever reason.”

He couldn’t really argue, but he didn’t want to discuss it.He didn’t even really know how to.

“yeah, heh, guess i’m not too great with  _change._ ”He pulled the hem of his blue hoodie, gesturing to his entire outfit.He only got a tired stare out of that one.

“After that, and the magic, and the lab...misunderstanding.  I mean, he’s barely even bragged about himself once!  And then the phone thing??”She brushed a strand of loose hair behind her fin, exasperatedly closing her eyes, “I just don’t know what’s bugging him.  But it’s really doing a number, whatever it is.”

Fragmented partial memories from previous timelines became interspersed with recent ones as he watched her.If there was anyone who came even close to loving his brother even a fraction of how much he did, it was her.And teamwork makes the dream work, right?

“yeah...” he took a deep breath, not meeting the eye that watched him carefully, “he’s used orange magic before.”

She seemed taken aback, but didn’t dare interrupt.This was possibly the most he’d ever directly spoken to her, well, probably ever.  Anyone who knew him knew he didn’t talk about stuff like this.This was different.

“he didn’t lie to you, he probably doesn’t remember...it was when we were kids.”Memories that far back felt like several lifetimes ago, but he could still feel them.They were fragmented and scattered, but they were still there.

She watched him patiently, wide eyed at the sudden exposition.He did his best to choke back the fear pressuring him to stop.

“i was pretty little, too, didn’t realize how unusual it is for a kid that young to be using color magic.”The tightness in his chest eased somewhat as he let the memory take him, “he couldn’t control it, he was really scared...i couldn’t help him, so i did what i could.taught him blue magic instead.‘s been like that ever since.he’s always been really good at blue, at least.”There wasn’t much else to the story, but the apprehension of saying too much stopped him, regardless.

“Sounds like one hell of a childhood.”He was grateful that she didn’t ask further.She rarely spoke of her past, either, so if anyone would understand, it made sense it would be her.

“We’re on the same team here, Sans.I just wanna make sure he’s okay.”

He could hear the strain in her voice, she knew just how thin this ice was, but she was right.In the end, all that mattered was Papyrus.

“i know he’s not gunna come to me for everything.i know,” his voice hitched in his throat for a soulbeat, a more forced smile replacing the one that came naturally, “i know he thinks i don’t trust him.” he finally looked back to her, “you don’t have to keep me in the loop, but just-“

A flurry of alarms interrupted them, chilling him to the marrow.Rushing back into the lab, a calamity of popping and crashing came from the room his brother was in, flames lashing out from the now broken door.With a silent agreement, he ran to that room while Undyne sprinted to the other.

Using blue magic, he forced the door the rest of the way open, revealing his brother taking cover under the table.He was completely tangled up in wires attached to the machine that had partially exploded.

“SANS!”

Pulse drowning out any other sound, he used the same magic to pull his brother to him, severing every tie as he teleported them into the middle of the main lab.When had the lights gone out?

Papyrus was shaking furiously in his arms, clutching him like he was afraid he might disappear. 

No....he was shielding him. 

Pulling his older brother closer, another crackling explosion sounded behind them.Together, their magic prevented any shrapnel from reaching them.

“Sans!Papyrus!”He could recognize Alphys’ voice, but it was falling on deaf ears.Or rather, ones that didn’t exist.

heh.heh heh.

“PAPYRUS!!”

Gathering his focus back into motion, he dared a glance back over his brother’s shoulder, watching the lab’s emergency system kick into gear.Drowning out the explosion with several layers of flame retardant, the only thing left visible was the broken door pulled wildly out of place.

“pap...bro...”He shifted into a better position to reassure his brother, “it’s over, we’re good.You good?” 

He ran his hands over the still unsteady frame of his brother, checking for any serious wounds that could have occurred in the time before he could reach him.Breathing heavily, the torrent of magic faded as the younger skeleton pulled back to do the same.

“I-I’M ALRIGHT.”

It felt like his entire being decompressed with relief as Papyrus pulled him back in for a hug.

The sound of running drew his attention back to the others as they hurried over.Undyne slid to her knees to look them over for herself, mostly Papyrus, but Alphys hung back a few steps.

“I-I’m so s-sorry!!It sh-shouldn’t have- the-the entire lab i-is- I mean, I don’t-I don’t-“

“hey, alphys,” leaning back, he barely turned his head to catch her eye, “your lab might be a little too  _electrifying._ ”

She could only bury her face into her hands in response.Whatever she was trying to say wasn’t important right now, his brother had a few burns along his side.They could tackle whatever was at fault here later; that came first.

“W-WE SHOULD PROBABLY GO...BACK UPSTAIRS?”  Focusing back on them, his brother looked so much smaller, all curled up in Undyne’s arms like that.She nodded, not giving him the chance to protest as she swung her arms under him and scooped him up, mindful of the wounds.Although, the way he was clinging to her, didn’t feel like he woulda, anyway.

“I-I’ll just...make sure everything down here...s-stays off...”hands trembling, Alphys slunk back towards the far side of the open room, toward a hall they hadn’t been down.Presumably leading to the control room.

With a hollow sigh, he pushed himself up and dragged his feet after the monster toting his brother.He slowed to a stop before he even reached the hallway.

“hey, uh, i’ll  _ketchup_ with you in a minute.”

Earning only a hesitant glance from Undyne, he waited until they were juuuust out of sight to...take a shortcut to the monitor room.He couldn’t exactly explore the one full of white foam right now, so this would have to do.

Everything had been powered down by whatever caused this.A surge, probably.He remembered helping Alphys with the blueprints for the mini-core she developed to power this new lab.By comparison, it was closer to microscopic.The magic harnessing device they created was a fraction of a fraction of the scale of the one Underground...still, it could do a lot of damage.

His distorted reflection looked back at him in the dark screens he’d been watching his brother from no more than a couple of hours ago.What could have caused such a dramatic malfunction?

The patter of claws on metal alerted him of the return of the scientist.Sitting back in the chair she’d stationed earlier, he waited in the dim of the emergency lights for her inevitable entrance.

She let a shrill squeak, cutting off a full on scream once she realized who was in front of her.

“S-Sans!I thought you-I thought you went back upstairs.”

“nah, you know me.so lazy even stairs can be too much sometimes.”

That ashamed look from earlier cast a shadow across her face as she stared down at the floor.

“I-I really am sorry...I don’t know what happened...”

He let that tiny sliver of genuine anger relish her guilt for a moment before conceding.

“nah.i helped design the thing.you and me both are _at_ _ the core _ of this.”

She managed half a smile at the joke, “I don’t r-really believe that, but thanks...”

Leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table, he watched her reflection now, as she sat across from him.

“so, _patella_ me what’s going on with the converter.”


	10. Self Sustaining System

  Reorienting yourself after a machine explodes beside you is easier said than done.Luckily, The Great Papyrus is highly adaptable and capable of recovering from anything in a surprisingly short amount of time.

The only problem was...that wasn’t what had upset him.

Distracting himself, he counted the number of bounds it took his friend to reach the top of the stairs with him in tow.Undyne certainly liked throwing him around at any given opportunity, but she didn’t seem to be enjoying it right now.

His eyes were fixed, like he was watching the collar hem of her shirt, but his attention drifted.The images that flashed through his mind just before he’d been explosively awakened still lingered.Odd hands, distorted faces, pain, a lot of pain....he hadn’t had nightmares like those in a very long time.

So much so, he’d nearly forgotten about them.

About him.

They were in the living room by the time a change in movement stirred him from his thoughts.Undyne mindfully eased him onto the couch, where he promptly sat up, looking to her.

“I’M FEELING MUCH BETTER.I THINK WE SHOULD PROBABLY-“ who was we?Sans was nowhere to be seen.He furrowed his brow slightly, scanning the hall they’d come down like his brother might reappear at any moment.

“He stayed back to help Alphys, remember?”His friend tried to focus his attention, but he was too dedicated to hoping his brother could feel him willing him to make an appearance.“That was just, like, four minutes ago.”

“NYEH, RIGHT!”Conceding, he smiled back at her as she sat at the other end of the couch, “MAYBE I MIGHT NOT BE ENTIRELY OKAY RIGHT NOW, BUT REST MOST ASSUREDLY THAT THE GREAT PAPYRUS-“

“A machine you were strapped to exploded.If you think I’m lettin’ you waltz right out of here, you’ve got another thing coming, Pap.”

“I’M NOT A BABY, UNDYNE, YOU DON’T NEED TO TAKE CARE OF ME!”Crossing his arms, he puffed out his chest indignantly, flinching as an electric pain shot up his left side.

“If you’re not a baby how come your brother has to read you a bed time story?” Leaning forward, Undyne challenged him playfully.

But his eyes remained averted, scowling at the wall he now faced.As much as he knew she was only trying to distract him, he felt a pang of guilt that he’d stopped asking the older skeleton to do just that, and for a while now, too.They didn’t do much of anything together anymore, not since being on the surface...

“Awe, did I hurt the baby’s feelings?”Leaning back again, she propped her feet up on the table as she jeered at him.

“FIRST OF ALL, IT IS A BROTHERLY BONDING ACTIVITY.SECOND OF ALL, YOU HAVE LITTLE ROOM TO JUDGE, YOU WATCH ANIME, WHICH IS FOR BABIES.”

Gasping, she pushed forward, shoving his unharmed shoulder, “HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU ITS NOT FOR BABIES!OH MY GOD!!”

“CARTOONS ARE FOR BABIES, UNDYNE.”

“I’M GUNNA TOSS YOU IN THE TRASH, PUNK!” She swiftly pulled his head under her arm and noogied him, ignoring his protests.

Eventually freeing himself from her grip, she laughed as he shoved her away, moving his hand guardedly to a sore spot on his left arm.

Shifting back into a more comfortable position, Undyne’s smile faded somewhat, a calm demeanor reclaiming the atmosphere.

“I know you can take a beating, dude, but...”looking back to her, he was surprised to see the caution in her eyes, “I know you didn’t want to do this in the first place, and I told you I wouldn’t let anything happen...” looking away, she seemed genuinely sheepish, as if she in anyway was responsible.

“I’M PRETTY SURE YOU DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS GOING TO EXPLODE.EVEN IF YOU DID, SOME THINGS ARE JUST MEANT TO HAPPEN!”In a way, he was almost grateful for the disturbance, at least it woke him from those dreams.

She looked back to him with her usual unsettled confusion, “I have no idea what you’re talkin’ about,” her familiar toothy grin soon followed as she leaned forward, throwing her arm across his shoulders, “But as long as you’re sure you’re really okay, I guess it’s not too bad!!”

“You’re a tough customer, Papyrus,” taking advantage of her current leverage, she pulled him sideways and backwards, eliciting a yelp, until he was lying down on the couch with his minor wounds on his exposed side, “I’m no good at healing magic, but it looks like it’s just you ‘n me for right now, so I’ll give it my best shot!”

In her maneuver, she had shifted to the table, sitting by his side to give her better access to the burns.

“Whoa!Dude, there’s even a few cracks!That thing really nailed ya!!”

He couldn’t restrain a flinch as she moved her hands over his side, averting his eyes to avoid the concerned look he knew he was receiving.As much as he wouldn’t admit it, the whole ordeal had him shaken.The look of fear in his brother’s eyes was seared into memory.

Doing his best to focus on the soft, fuzzy sort of feeling from Undyne’s magic penetrating his bones, he looked back to her.

Eyelids heavy, she look a million times more tired than the monster he’d been talking to just minutes ago.Was this all because of him?

Well, it was almost 5 am.

Things would go back to normal, it was just a weird, unconventional weekend.What day was it?He hadn’t looked at his calendar in probably over a week.

His focus drifted around her face, not needing glasses to survey the finer details this close.It was like things hadn’t changed one bit since coming to the surface.Her hair, her freckles, the tiny cuts and punctures decorating her fins.

He’d been afraid, when they arrived to the surface...that things would change.It was hard, sometimes, remembering the other timelines.Did she always stay friends with him?Would she continue on with her life without a reason like training to wind them back together?

This time was good, regardless of the others.She actually made an effort to stay in touch!Even when she wasn’t his boss!!!But, admittedly, it was harder that way, too...

Refocusing on the ceiling, he let those nightmares resurface, playing back the daunting images.Or were they memories?

A soft gasp derailed his train of thought, quickly realizing the other must have nodded off and startled back awake.Pushing himself back up, she sat forward, resting her arms on her legs.

“Sorry, Pap, guess I’m more tired than I thought.”

“IT’S OKAY, UNDYNE,” placing both hands on her shoulders, he offered her a sincere smile when she looked back to him.

“I CAN WALK OFF ANYTHING!WELL, MOSTLY ANYTHING...”

Slinging a hand up to his shoulder, his friend let out a sigh, “I know, dude, I know.But...you don’t always have to do it alone.”

As if that was his choice to make.A new pang of guilt hit him as he struggled to maintain his smile.

“I’M NEVER REALLY ALONE!”He quickly pulled one hand to his skull, tapping it assuredly, “EVERYONE’S ALWAYS WITH ME IN MY THOUGHTS!!”

Rolling her eyes, the fish monster shoved the shoulder her hand was on, “That’s sorta the spirit!”

Relieved to have put her mind at ease for the time being, he was still feeling the anxious pull to find a way home as soon as possible.His mind was still trying desperately to fixate back on those haunting images, and he needed a better distraction.One like Sans.

“I’M GOING TO SEE IF THEY NEED ANY ASSISTANCE.MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY AND TAKE A NAP?”He was careful not to get to his feet too quickly and upset her again.

She looked like she was ready to argue, but as she glanced out the window beside them, the soft glow of early morning sun bleaching the nighttime sky convinced her that he might be right this time.

“Yeah, I guess...but if anything else exciting happens, wake me up before it gets good!!”

“I WILL DO MY BEST TO MAKE SURE THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN!”

Winning a chuckle as they both got to their feet, Undyne promptly flopped onto the couch beside him.A convenient and well executed plan!

He bid her good morning to her muffled goodnight before finally, impatiently hurrying back to the stairs leading down to the lab.

His feet stopped him in the doorway as he stared down the dark stairwell, all prior apprehension returning with a fury.It shouldn’t have been as hard as it was, but it was almost strong enough to feel tangible, like a rope tied firmly around his soul, anchoring him.

His nervous energy was becoming dangerously pent up as his hands twitched at his sides.It felt like tiny little bugs were crawling up and down every bone of his body, and he hated it.

Giving up torturing himself any longer, he spun on his heel and paced in the secluded hallway.The hardwood echoed his steps too loudly for his liking, so he opted to step above it.Pacing a few inches above the ground, he began counting every time he circled back to the front door.

Sans would be up soon enough.

20.

Alphys would probably stay down there.She seemed pretty guilty earlier, even if it wasn’t her fault.

40.

He avoided looking into the mirror by the door.

60.

It had been exactly 6 days since the last time he’d looked at his calendar, so not even a week.He had to remember his trip was coming up soon, though.

He’d made 72 loops by the time a subtle flash of light caught his attention.Dropping silently back to the floor, he was greeted by a mildly surprised look from his brother as he stepped into the hall.

“papyrus?isn’t undyne ‘sposed to be healing you?”His tone was relaxed, not accusatory, which was another relief.

“SHE DID!BUT I TOLD HER SHE NEEDED SLEEP, TOO, SO I DECIDED TO WAIT FOR YOU INSTEAD!”

The silence hanging in the air didn’t reflect the words he could see in his brother’s eyes.Finally picking a place to focus, Sans’s eyes looked lamely to the blatantly visible marks still marring his arm, letting his smile fall.

“looks like she did a pretty  _fishy_   job.”

The uncharacteristic seriousness on his brother’s face matched with the relentless build up of raw stressful energy tipped the scales, his face screwing up into a strained smile.

“pap...?” Alarmed by his brother’s admittedly strange behavior, he reached out a hand, but it couldn’t make contact before the metaphorical dam broke.

Laughter, his own, abrupt and loud filled the hallway.He couldn’t stop, tipping slightly forward and wrapping his arms around his rib cage.It felt like his head could’ve rolled right off.He could feel the hint of tears in the corners of his sockets, screwed shut as he tried unsuccessfully to catch his breath. 

Only distantly aware of his brother’s attempts to regain his focus, he managed to draw out a few deeper breaths, fighting back more giggles, as he pulled his attentionback to the shorter skeleton.

Eyes wide and confused, the older monster was smiling again, but more so out of a concealed panic than anything. 

“-pap, bro, you gotta...you gotta talk to me.i don’t know, i don’t-”

“THAT WAS BY FAR AND AWAY,” another grappling breath, “THE WORST JOKE YOU HAVE EVER MADE.”

Breathing heavily, he regained balance by propping himself on his knees.

“yeah, heh,” his brother tapped his cheekbone anxiously, “wasn’t my best.”

The unexpected relief from the outburst was blissful, the pain in his side from the strain completely numb by now.Fighting off the remaining giggles, he straightened back up as his brother stepped closer.

“we should probably get you home.You’re looking a little, uh,  _bed-draggled_ .”

Sputtering as a new wave of snickering pulled him back in, the older skeleton moved around him, taking his hand to lead him back towards the door.

“WAIT, WAIT,” wiping a tear from his eye with his free hand, he resisted slightly, speaking through the mild laughter, “WHAT ABOUT MY BACKPACK?”

“right,” a sigh, “right.i’ll be right back.”

“ _PACK_.”Wheezing with laughter at his own awful joke, he earned a sidelong smile from his brother before he vanished.

Whatever had possessed him had a firm hold, and he was starting to feel light headed, but...it was possibly the happiest he’d felt in days.

Weeks, even.

Sans returned ‘in the blink of an eye’, the thought bringing on more giddy snickering while his brother led him like a stumbling drunkard to the door.

The sun was almost fully up by now, bathing everything in its warm light.Finally able to get a grip, they walked hand in hand down the sidewalk back to their own house.

Not many monsters were out yet, but he caught the attention of a nice couple walking across the street.They didn’t say anything, but it made him sharply aware that the entire left side of his outfit was torn and burned, revealing scraped and damaged bone in its stead.He was probably quite a sight, being walked home like child who’d gotten into a fight at the local park.

And yet, he didn’t care.

The feeling of his brother’s fingers clutched firmly, yet gently around his hand, the, albeit blurry, early morning sky colored in oranges and blues, the birds singing unabashedly, not yet disturbed by the daily hustle.It was nice.

It was nice to not have to think.

He started humming.

He was barely aware of the pressuring ache that was settling in to the mild wounds along his side.He was barely even aware when he nearly tripped on the stairs up the porch.They were home already?

He felt another hand steadying him.

“easy, easy.don’t need any more dents right now, do ya?”

Firmly resting his hands on Sans’s shoulders, he was mindful not to actually rest any of his weight on the exhausted skeleton.The bags under the eyes focused on him reminded him just how long it had been since his brother’s last nap.

“SANS, I THINK YOU SHOULD GET SOME SLEEP, TOO.”

“wh-yeah,” carefully turning to head up to the porch, he reaffirming-ly gripped his brother’s arm, “let’s get in the house first, though, alright?”

Nodding confirmation, he followed with ease.Contrary to expectations, he was actually feeling fairly reinvigorated by the stroll home.

He let his brother lead him to the living room couch, tugging him down as well when he flopped onto it.The older monster sat with his eyes closed, head rolled back, drinking in the moment of peace, while he watched thoughtfully, noting just how much the past twenty 4 hours had put his brother through.

Reluctant to interrupt, the silence was broken soon enough when the other rolled his head back forward, drawing sleep deprived eyes back to him.

“you look  _shockingly_   happy considering you were just involved in a lab accident.”His brother smiled at him in that secretive sort of way, like he was looking for something he knew he could find if he dug deep enough.

“I’M JUST GLAD TO BE AWAY FROM THERE!!”He straightened up, returning the smile in a more sincere way.Whatever his brother was looking for, he wasn’t going to find it.

“yeah, that makes sense.”Conceding, the older skeleton closed his eyes and shrugged, “still gotta heal you, though.”

“RIGHT...” laying back against the cushions, he watched his brother shift to sit alongside him, inspecting the injuries without bothering them.

“that thing really got you good, huh?”

The tiniest flourish of guilt blossomed in his chest.Both Undyne and his brother had a knack for taking responsibility for everything that happened to him, and this was no exception.

“IT DOESN’T REALLY HURT.I THINK IT LOOKS WORSE THAN IT IS.”It did hurt.A good bit, now that he was thinking about it.

“nothin’ _rattles_ you .” Hovering his hands just above the damaged arm, the affection in Sans’s voice eased his weary thoughts.

His brother’s magic didn’t tickle the way Undyne’s did, it just felt warm, strong.Comfortable.Even though he wasn’t particularly good at healing magic, he couldn’t mask the intensity of his soul when in action.A soft blue aura stirred in his left eye as he focused.

Finding himself entranced by the glow, after some amount of time (he’d lost track) he could see the light reflected in the beads of sweat rolling down the other’s face.

Taking one hand cautiously in his own, the blue magic flickered out between his fingers, warranting a questioning glance from his brother.Wordlessly, he understood.Giving up the fact that it was obvious the toll this was taking, he stopped completely, letting himself fall against the mostly repaired shoulder.

“sorry” was muffled out from beside him.

“YOU DID REALLY WELL THAT TIME!I THINK YOU’RE GETTING BETTER AT HEALING.”

Grumbling out an agreement, he shifted enough to be heard, “not really something i want a reason to practice.”

Humming his understanding, he moved his arm around his brother’s shoulders, letting him rest against his rib cage.He’d already managedto fall asleep.

While he himself didn’t feel tired yet, he was reluctant to shift back into the daily gear.He’d eventually have to face Alphys about all of this, and reassure her that everything was fine.Except, he didn’t really know if it was.Whatever had triggered the machine to go off went conspicuously hand in hand with whatever had cast such dramatic shadows over his usually more mundane nightmares.

It wasn’t entirely unusual for a timeline to become unpredictable, but the ones with _him_ usually  didn’t end well.Admittedly, he hadn’t seen him since Frisk fell.A while before that, even.But he suddenly felt himself grappling with that old, infuriatingly frustrating insecurity.

The massive gaps in his own memory caused by the repeated trauma of the resets was just about the only thing he was certain of, anymore.But if he did his best, stayed true to form, was the most ‘Papyrus’ he could be, surely he couldn’t forget anything too important.

And honestly.He didn’t think he ever remembered that mysterious ghost in the first place.Which of course only added to the maddening illusion.

But nothing was more important than doing his best to keep this timeline on the straight and narrow.

Save for the past week, everyone had been so happy!It was really starting to feel like this might be the one!The true continuation of their story!Whatever that even meant, anyway.

Everyone had been really happy.And if everyone else was happy, so was he!And Sans would come around!The longer they remained like this, he had to!

He was certain of it!


	11. Planes, Trains, and Automobiles

_Blue suit, green tie.Check._

_Grey suit, blue tie.Check._

_Pajamas.Check._

_Camera.Camera..._

_Camera?_

Shoving the suitcase further up his bed, he patted the rumpled blankets.Where had he set it?

With a frustrated huff, he carefully unpacked the suitcase, the oddly smooth fabric making it difficult to keep folded.

Suits were so complicated.He’d found a spark of interest once he realized the fine grain of the fabric, and the fastidious stitch-work in every seam...but it was gone again once he remembered he was going to have to wear it.

Mr. Asgore had insisted it was important to respect human culture, but he just didn’t see why it was so pertinent to wear.So.Much. 

Of course, the king was used to it!Wearing all that armor and robes and whatnot for so long. 

But he wasn’t going to make a fuss about it ~~again~~ after two years.Maybe he could propose ‘casual gatherings’ with much more comfortable clothing, and settling debates with friendly sparring...

What had he been doing?

Untucking the short list trapped under the corner of the luggage, he realized he still hadn’t found his camera.Sighing with reluctance, he dragged himself off the bed.

And he’d almost been done, too.

Making his way around the room, it’s lack of presence began antagonizing him.No.No.Nope.Nothing.He could’ve sworn he tossed it on the bed!But with digging through the drawers of his dresser and rummaging through his shelves yielding no results, he decided to seek out help.

Sans almost always had the answer.If his head ever popped off, he was sure to find one of those magic eight ball die rolling around in there.

Making his way out into the hall, he called out into the quiet house.

“SANS!!”

When no reply found him, he continued to the stairs, only to be stopped when he found his brother at the bottom, already heading up.

“sup?”

“HAVE YOU SEEN MY CAMERA?”

“uhhhh,” reaching the top, he stood beside him, “nope.have you tried  _picturing_ the last place you had it?”

“I DID.IT WAS ON MY-“ _oh_ , “SANS!!”Stomping his foot, he crossed his arms, “WE LEAVE IN THE MORNING, I HAVE NO TIME FOR YOUR TOMFOOLERY!”He should’ve just kept looking.

“okay, okay.i got ya.” Waving off his brother’s annoyance, he shoved his hands in their favorite place; his pockets, “where was it?”

“IT WAS ON MY BED.”Turning, they shuffled back toward his room, “I TOOK IT OUT OF MY BACKPACK TO MAKE SURE I HAD IT!BUT NOW I DON’T HAVE IT, SO THAT DIDN’T REALLY PAN OUT.”

“we’ll find it, you’re pretty good at finding lost things.”There was a tiredness in his voice, like he’d gone too long without sleeping again.

The past few days had been rough.After the sleep study, Sans had spent most of his time hauled up in his office.It was clear whatever he was doing was putting a lot of strain on him.Even with being nagged to get up and move a little, and invited to come on jogs or walks into town, he couldn’t even muster up his usual annoyingly punny rebuttals when he declined.

This was all his fault.

Leaning halfway into the closet searching coat pockets, he craned his neck back to find his brother sitting on the bed, absentmindedly petting one of the suit jackets.

“AREN’T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING?”Straightening up, he could feel a shirt caught on his head, like an accidental hat.Maybe that would at least earn a chuckle?

And he was correct.

“yeah, sorry.you know helping’s not my strong suit.” His brother’s sincere laughter was becoming a rarity these days, “nice hat.”

“SANS!”Feigning frustration, he abandoned his current search to check the chest on the other side of the room.There would be absolutely no reason for anything to be in there beside his old ‘battle body’, but it was worth a check.

“no, i mean it.you could rock a do-rag.”

He could hear shuffling from behind as he opened the noisy crate, unsurprised as his brother pulled up beside him.

“haven’t seen that in a while.still looks pretty good, though.we sure made it sturdy, huh?”

It...looked different than he remembered.It was indeed impressively well made.The finer details were no doubt his brother’s work, he felt bad he hadn’t been able to appreciate them before.

Something akin to regret started playing at the top of his chest.Now really wasn’t the time to reminisce.He shouldn’t have...

“I ALWAYS GIVE 100%.AND ON THE RARE OCCASION THAT YOU ACTUALLY TRY, THE RESULTS SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES!!”

“heh.guess you’re right.”

“WHEN AM I NOT!NYEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!!”Shutting the case less than gently, they moved back towards the center of the room, his brother flopping back onto the bed.

“you’ve got a good _skele-point_.”

“I’M NOT GOING TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT,” spinning on his heal, he headed towards the door, “WE NEED A NEW APPROACH!THIS CAMERA SHALL NOT BEST US!”

“bro-“

“I WILL CHECK THE LIVING ROOM AND YOU CAN CHECK THE DINING ROOM!”

He was already halfway down the stairs when Sans materialized before him.

“bro.”Presenting him with the aforementioned device, he chuckled again, “it was under the pillow.”

“OH.GOOD WORK, DETECTIVE SANS!!” 

“call me sherlock bones.”

_Wow_.

Taking the camera, he pointed it firmly at the skeleton before him, narrowing his eyes.

“THAT...MAY NOT BE THE WORST ONE YOU’VE MADE THIS WEEK.”

“i’m glad you like it.”

Biting back a smile, he, again, circled back to his bedroom, brother not far behind.

“what time is king bunny ears picking you up?”

“4 AM SHARP!”The other monster took his place back on the bed while he worked on repositioning the clothes back in the briefcase.Everything had to be in the correct formation for the most convenient accessibility!Each garment folded to fit around the other’s!Puzzle format always worked best.

“it’s almost midnight, paps, you gotta get some sleep or you’re gunna be  _bone-tired_.”

“I’M FINE!!”Glancing back to the other, he was vaguely surprised that his brother had, at some point, located his rubix cube, but his hands froze at the hasty response.It certainly hadn’t been his most discreet lie.

His gaze darted to the window as his brother sat back up, tilting his head with suspicion in his eyes. 

Yeah, he messed up.

“paps...don’t tell me...”

“I TOLD YOU, I’M PERFECTLY FINE!FIT AS A...AS A...FISH!FIT AS A FISH!THAT’S HOW THE SAYING GOES, RIGHT?”

“...it’s fiddle-“

“THAT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE!HOW COULD A FIDDLE WORK OUT??UNDYNE IS INCREDIBLY BUFF!”Hurriedly zipping the luggage, he almost caught his finger.It had been five days since the ‘study incident’, and he hadn’t so much as stretched out.

“you can’t just not sleep for a week, bro.”

“THAT MEANS A LOT COMING FROM THE MONSTER THAT WILL STOP EATING FOR DAYS AT A TIME!”

Standing his ground,he crossed his arms again, his brother rolling his eyes in response.He was right!!Sans was being very hypocritical!

“YOU HAVEN’T EVEN BEEN EATING THE LUNCHES I PACK FOR YOU!”

Sighing his defeat, the older skeleton looked back to him sympathetically. 

“okay, then how about this,” gesturing to himself, “i’ll get something to eat,” now to him, “if you take a nap.”

Tapping a finger to his chin, he narrowed his eyes, “THAT SOUNDS LIKE...” maybe not such a bad idea, “A FAIR OFFER!”Emphasizing his approval with a firm nod, something occurred to him.

“JUST AS LONG AS YOU DON’T MEAN-“

A teasing smile was all he got before his brother vanished from his bed in a flicker of blue magic.

“-GRILLBY’S...” sighing to himself and no one else, he looked back at the sealed suitcase taking up the bottom half of his mattress.

He was only going to be gone for three days.Sans would be okay.It wasn’t like this was his first trip out of country.He’d already managed the closest thing to a promise he could get from his brother about opening his hot dog stand back up in the park.It was basically Summer now, and he really needed to get back in the swing of things!

Gracelessly shoving the luggage to the floor, he flicked the lights off with blue magic before crawling onto the bed itself.

Ever since they’d been on the surface, his brother had been doing all sorts of odd jobs, committing to nothing in particular.It was just work for the sake of work.And it wasn’t like he wasn’t napping through most of his shifts anyway.

Dwelling on his worries was probably more restful than anything that would happen if he let himself fall asleep, but the longer he laid motionless, staring at the ceiling, the heavier his eyelids felt.It was looking like the choice wasn’t his to make anymore.

A darkness took him as quickly as conscious thought abandoned him.Only strange sounds and incomprehensible images filled his mind now.Nothing too unsightly, nothing enough to stir him.But after what felt like hour and hours of inability to collect himself, unaware he was sleeping, the sounds turned into screams.Not organic, but machine like in nature.Loud, louder, yet louder, they could’ve split his skull had he not awoken in a cold sweat.

Panting feverishly, he fumbled to find the phone he’d never taken out of his pocket.

It had been a little over an hour.

All things said and done, it was the closest thing to decent sleep he’d gotten in months.The sound still haunting him, he rubbed his face against the pillow before fiddling (now that word was going to be stuck in his head for days) with his phone again.A little bit of music would help.

Pulling himself back to his feet, he rested the phone-turned-jukebox on his dresser.The surest fire way to recover from a nightmare was distraction.And what better a distraction than puzzle making?

Automatically knowing what to do, he retrieved his almost entirely used notebook, decorated with countless stickers he’d been gifted by Frisk, along with a pencil from his bookcase.He decided the floor to be the best place for creativity, so lying down, he got to work.

Sketching out ideas, plans, blueprints, adding finishing touches to older ones...his mind was at ease.No more calamitous sounds, or uncomfortably prophetic images of timelines he didn’t remember.Just numbers and images and intricate patterns.

It wasn’t until the sound of footsteps downstairs that he realized he’d completely lost track of time.But he was intent on finishing this one specific part...

“hey, bro, i’m...back.”The door creaked open, louder than his brother’s hushed tone, as he crept in.

“no dice on that nap?”

“IT WOULD TAKE THREE TWENTY-SIDED DIE AND 1 SIX-SIDED TO ROLL A SIXTY-TWO, WHICH IS HOW MANY MINUTES I WAS UNCONSCIOUS!”

Silence filled the room as the older monster made his way closer, sitting carefully across from him.

“you making puzzles again?you’re using your puzzle voice.”

“I...” looking up, he blinked the other into focus.

“isn’t it kinda hard to see in the dark?”

The light...he never put it back on.

A soft chuckle escape the monster facing him as he leaned forward and adjusted his glasses, “guess those sixty-two minutes didn’t really help, huh?”

He hadn’t taken his glasses off, either.

“IT WAS...OKAY.”He smiled earnestly, hoping it came across as true as it was.Which seemed to satisfy the other, closing his eyes contentedly as he leaned back on his hands.

The music seemed much more quiet now, for some reason.He found himself staring at a near illegible sketch of a particularly complicated puzzle he’d been working on for a few weeks.It spanned across both pages, notes littering any free space.

What good did puzzles serve here on the surface?The humans didn’t do them, and so few monsters bothered anymore.Was their soul purpose to catch a human?What would he ever even use these for?

Sighing, he closed the notebook and rested his head on the floor.It would serve him well to appreciate this moment of calm before the storm, so to speak.The next few days would be busy.Sort of.

They stayed like that for a while, but eventually, the dull thud of a large paw knocking on their door stirred him.Sans had fallen asleep already, but gathered enough strength to open an eye.

“sounds like you’ve _goat_ to get going.”

“YES, YES.”Dismissing the joke with a wave, he got to his feet and collected his suitcase.The smile he wore was second nature by now, much like his brother’s, but he didn’t need it right now.A sincere one found him, as made his way to the door and turned back.

“I’M GOING TO MAKE A SUIT THAT HAS SHORTS SOME DAY.THEY COULDN’T THEY IT WASN’T _CLEAN CUT._ ”

“ _seams_ like a good plan to me.”

Maybe things were starting to feel normal again.It felt good.

“I’LL BE EXPECTING UPDATES ON STAND SET UP!NO SLACKING OFF JUST BECAUSE I’M GONE!!”

Easing down onto the floor, his brother rested his hands behind his head, “you got it, cool dude.call when you get there.”

“MOST DEFINITELY!!BUT NOT ON THE PLANE THIS TIME, THEY GOT REALLY MAD ABOUT THAT...”

Another knock reminded him of the monster waiting on their porch.

“I’LL BE BACK ON MONDAY!FAREWELL FOR NOW!!”

“see ya later, bro.”

Whisking the worry from his mind, he hurried down the stairs and to the door, only remembering his shoes just before he rushed outside.

Throwing the door open, he was met by the ex-King’s back as he sat on the stairs, turning with a kind smile.

“Good morning, Papyrus.Are you ready?I hope was not too impatient.”

“NOT AT ALL.I WAS BEING SUCKED INTO MY BROTHER’S LAZY SPIRIT, AND YOU SAVED ME!!A TRUE HERO!”

The monster’s chuckle was deep but light, a surprisingly soft sound for such an imposing being, but it suited him.

“Very well.Shall we get going?”

“IN THE WORDS OF THE INSURMOUNTABLE METTATON, ‘OH YES!’”

The smile he always found on the goat dad’s face was probably the most genuine he’d ever seen.There was such sadness in his eyes, but it felt like he really truly tried to appreciate every bit of happiness that found him.It was inspirational, in a way.

They headed to the garage along side the house, where he quickly opened the garage and hustled to the car.They always took his since it was a convertible.Humans apparently didn’t make any cars with 9 ft. tall goat monsters in mind.

Within a moments notice, he pulled the car out and cheerily waited for his boss to get adjusted in the back.Both suitcases sat in the front.But something gnawed at him.

Asgore watched him curiously as he hesitated, clenching the steering wheel as he stared at the logo on it.His brother had seemed down...He asked every time for a while, but usually got a ‘no’.His brother didn’t like being in cars, very much, for some odd reason.He liked car magazines a lot, so why...

“Papyrus?Is something wrong?”

“NO!I JUST REMEMBERED, I FORGOT SOMETHING!”

Sliding out his phone, he dialed the number almost instinctively.Undyne always mocked him for not just using the contacts.But why would he need contacts when he has glasses!

It only rung twice before “uh, everything okay?”

“I FORGOT TO ASK IF YOU WANTED TO RIDE TO THE AIRPORT!”

There was silence on the other end, which always stressed him out.The soft phone static always sounded so loud to him.He didn’t expect a yes, but-

“actually.yeah.think i could use a ride.”

“WOWIE!I DIDN’T THINK YOU’D SAY YES!!OKAY!WE’RE IN THE DRIVEWAY!”

Not missing a beat, he jumped out and wrangled the luggage to the trunk.Just in time, too, as his brother ambled out the front door, locking it before he made the rest of the way to the vehicle.

“morning, ‘gorey’.”

Hopping back into the drivers seat, he was surprised to find the old monster blushing as he looked away.

“Good morning, Sans.”

“GOOD MORNING, SANS!”

“good morning, papyrus.”

“IS EVERYONE COMPLETELY AND ENTIRELY SEATED AND BUCKLED?”

“Yes.”

A thumbs up from his brother.

“THEN WE HAVE LIFT OFF!!”

“Please do not drive fast enough to remove the tires from the ground again.”The goat monster clenched his hands on the seats in front of him, shutting his eyes in pleading.

“NO PROMISES!!”

And, at a reasonable middle ground speed, they were off, down the road.

The sun was just starting to come up, lending a dim periwinkle glow to everything around.It was one of his most favorite colors the world could be.Driving with glasses was quite remarkable.Even when he couldn’t take the time to focus on certain things, the sharp, crisp colors of traffic lights and road signs were totally new and exciting.It was a definitely surprise to realize all those yellow ones had words and pictures!!It was looking like he had a lot of reeducating to do.

A few glances back at his passengers revealed a less uneasy than usual Asgore, and a, well, a seemingly blissful Sans.

His brother had his chin rested on the backs of his hands propped where the window would normally be, letting the wind whistle through his skull.His eyes were closed, he might even have been sleeping!Usually he was flat  against the seat, eyes wide, but he looked like his usual, relaxed self. 

Maybe he was a better driver with glasses.

The ride was almost a dream.Very little traffic, and he loved driving on the big open roads, where you’re actually supposed to go fast!Once they finally arrived to their destination, Asgore even complimented on his improvements!And it was sincere, he was barely shaking at all!

His brother had actually fallen asleep, so he contemplated still putting his car in paid parking, but with a single shout, his eyelids were fluttering.

“what’s up?”

“WOULD YOU LIKE TO DRIVE HOME?”

Holding the keys out, his brother looked at them, then him, then them, then him once more.

“i, uh, i’m sans license, bro.”

“THAT’S OKAY!I TRUST YOU NOT TO GET CAUGHT!”

Winning a chuckle from the older monster, he finally took the keys, “i’ll think about it.”

“EXCELLENT!WE’RE GOING TO GO NOW, SO GOODBYE FOR REAL THIS TIME!”Leaning over the door, he hugged his brother almost up out of the seat.

“bye, paps.be careful.”

“I WILL!I HAVE MR. KING ASGORE, TOO!!SO DON’T WORRY!”

“alright.see ya.”

“BYE BYE!!”Catching up with the ex-King, who had gone ahead to the doors, he waved over his shoulder as his brother waved back.

“I’m going to pretend like I didn’t hear that license part.”The monster rested a hand on his shoulder to guide him as he waved more feverishly before finally letting himself be led  inside.

“SANS IS GOOD AT EVERYTHING WHEN HE WANTS TO BE.HE JUST HAS TO TRY!!!”Repositioning the suitcase onto its wheels, they both started into the lobby of the airport.

“Yes, I suppose he is.”

Smiling brightly in agreement, he still couldn’t help but feel like he’d forgotten something.Hopefully it would pass soon, whatever it was.They would probably be waiting about an hour until they could even board the flight, and then another hour until take off.

Human systems were so awkward and non-conducive to success.Hopefully, they would learn just how much the monsters could do to help them!!That’s what these meetings were all about, anyway!!

Well, they would be, one day.Once the humans finally just embraced them!  They were so embraceable!!So it wouldn’t be long.  It couldn’t be!

They would make sure of that!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I managed....to make zero story progress in this chapter. It’s all just more exposition....I’m sorry...........


	12. Return Trip

  A bright sound startled him awake.His ringtone filling up the small room with its upbeat tune, but his tired arms told him it could wait as he struggled to reach across the desk.At this point, he was lucky to have gotten any sleep at all.

Turning it upright, the name woke him properly with a spark of alertness as he fumbled to answer.

“hey, al, whatcha got for me?”

A shaky silence made the static sound louder than usual.He could hear her breathing, barely, but a sharp inhale let him know she hadn’t called by accident.

“everything okay?”

Fear trickled down his spine as he was answered by another silence.Then...

“I...I really think...you sh-should come over.”

The strain of tears was in her voice, something was very wrong.

Hanging up, he took a brisk short cut to the long hallway leading down to her lab, then another to the main room.A single light stretched out from an office in the far right corner of the open space.It isolated itself from the rest of the otherwise dark laboratory.

With a deep breath, he reestablished his cool as he made his way to the eerie room.Doubt bloomed in his rib cage with every step.The sight he found was something out of a nightmare.

Illuminating blue light was glowing off a large computer screen across from the doorway, distorted error messages corrupting any space available.It muted the otherwise colorful lights on the panel of controls beside her, disrupted only by the silhouette of the small scientist.

The rigid posture of the other monster did not fail as he shuffled his feet, unwilling to commit to fully entering the room.But the soft scraping sounds of claws on metal was enough proof she’d heard him, as she clenched and unclench her hands on the console she sat at.

She finally found the strength the face him only seconds before he lost his strength to stay.Something was very, very wrong.

They’d spent the last week running diagnostics on the mini-core, as well as attempting determinedly to recover the results from the brashly interrupted sleep study.Neither of them dared suggesting what they both feared, but even after a long time apart, Alphys could understand him almost as well as his brother did.

But the look on her face snuffed out that tiny flicker of hope in a heartbeat.The light reflected across her glasses blocked out her eyes, but it revealed the tear stains trailing down her face.

“I don’t...I don’t understand.”

He could barely move as he forced a hand from his pocket and moved to flip the switch just inside he doorway, “why don’t we shed a little light-“

“NO!”

He started as she jumped up from her chair, shoulders tensing as he searched her face, waiting for an explanation. 

Her blood shot eyes now visible, she gaped at him like she was staring at a ghost; and not the friendly kind.Something seemed to slide back in place soon enough though, as her panic turned into a miserable frown.

“It t-took six days...but I found it.”She began collapsing in on herself slightly, “O-oh god.I wish-I wish I hadn’t...oh no.....”

“hey, alphys,” stepping forward felt like stepping into a separate plane of existence, “look at me,” ignoring his instincts screaming at him to run, he rested a hand on her shoulder, “you gotta tell me what happened.al?”

She flinched at the contact, but met his eyes with fresh tears in her own.

“E-everything’s down.It-it crashed everything-“

The buzz in his pocket reached his mind before the sound that caught the lizard’s breath.His ringtone echoed through the small room and back out into the hub, freezing them both to the spot.

The dread in his mind was reflected in the eyes of his friend as the chime repeated itself.It was not his ringtone.But it was most definitely his phone.

Swallowing back fear, his hand drifted stiffly to his pocket, finding the active device without breaking the unfocus trance they seemed locked in.

His chest was tight enough to hurt as he tried to find the phone with his eyes, but the glimpse he caught was a warning.A blank screen, where the number of an unknown caller would be only the number 6 repeated as it ran off the display.

It wasn’t too far to stop...it was like moving in slow motion...he brought the phone to the side of his head as his thumb grazed the answer button.It only registered then that claws were clenched firmly into his shirt, hands shaking, when the room exploded with sound.

Loud enough to drown out thought, a horrible medley of harsh noises surrounded them.It was like hearing the code of a thousand computers become corrupt all at once over and over again.

It ended with a simple tap of the screen, but the almost tangible horror it filled him with still choked the room.

Sounds fell from her mouth, but no words as Alphys fought to process anything above her shock.Instead of thinking, his mind focused on everything else.Hyper aware of every sound, of every color, of every image his unmoving eyes could take in.

Waiting.

The claws tangled in his shirt clenched tighter still, warranting blood to draw from small cuts caused in their own hands.It felt hot against his ribs.Then cold.

“Th-that was-that was,” a gasping breath broke off her sentence.Her eyes blinked a few times before she realized what she’d managed through her stress, releasing him in a flurry of apologies.

“Oh no, s-sorry!! oh- damn it!No!I’m s-so sorry!!I d-didn’t mean- I’m sorry!”The wounds were small enough that they’d nearly stopped already, but not enough to prevent a few smears from collecting on her face as she covered it in embarrassment.

It took a moment before he could really even comprehend current reality, cautiously sliding his hands back into his pockets.

“It’s alright, al, nothing gets done without a little blood, sweat, and tears.”His voice drew out slower than the blood, he felt drunk in his bewilderment, words slurring, dizzy and nauseous.

The movement of her head shaking was enough to give him control over his body to look at her, properly.

“N-no!I’m sorry!Th-that’s so gross!”Her voice was shaking, but it was lighter, more like her usual self now.

“I-I...” her hands drifted from her face as she looked back to him, something washing the intensity from her eyes as her face relaxed into a ‘normal’ frown, more confused than afraid, “...Sans?”

It felt like something was trying to pull his very thoughts from his head.Falling fully back into consciousness, he was still at a loss for complete composure, offering a nervous smile with his reply, “yeah?”

Blinking the darkness out as she focused on him, her brows furrowed, “H-how long have you been here?”

He could feel his eye lights flicker as he, again, grappled for a composure that wouldn’t come. 

“just...a few minutes.”

Holding her head like she’d hit it off something, she rubbed it contemplatively, “W-were you...here?When th-the system went down?”

A complete 180 from the way she’d been when he arrived.Almost entirely back to normal.Which was more unnerving.

“uh...nope.you wanna throw me a bone?”One of the best perks of being a skeleton is it being nearly impossible for anyone to tell when your teeth are clenched.

“O-oh, right...!”Still operating with only the uneasy blue light from the screen, Alphys turned back to the machine, scrambling over with a wave for him to follow.

“I-I was still trying t-to recover those results...from Papyrus’ s-study?”Taking her initial seat, he realized there were sloppy piles of papers on both sides of the computer.

“O-obviously you’ve been...very involved, so you know that it-that it hasn’t been particularly e-easy!”She was looking for something in the stack off to the right, finding it in surprisingly good time, “Th-the most we could get before was the, uh, first twenty minutes!But...”

When she swiveled her chair to face him again, a more fitting scowl found him, “I-I’m not so sure....we, um, we should tell Papyrus....okay?”

Oh this was not going to be good.

Well, not like it’d be the first time.

With a nonchalant nod, her frown relaxed to reveal her own guilt on the matter as she re-examined the papers in her grasp.The heavy feeling in his legs contradicted the fact that his head felt like it might detach and float away.

“Th-these are the beginning of the rest.”Her hands were trembling again as she handed off the thin set of papers.

The first page looked normal, from what he knew of sleep studies, quickly figuring out anything he didn’t already know.It was an actual effort to turn the page, rewarding his trepidation with the fruition of his worry. 

At first, it maintained its boring normality, but as the lines became more jagged and the numbers increased, slowly at first, then dramatically, it was easy enough to see where this was going.

The final page was the ultimate challenge, but like a Snowdrake in the headlights, he couldn’t look away.There, in perfect clarity, was absolute mayhem.Not only did the results go completely off the charts, the charts went completely off the paper, shattered in corrupted elements, random numbers and ‘errors’ staining the entire page until they became completely illegible.The entire bottom of the thing was torn and burnt, like the printer itself had collapsed under the strain of attempting to recreate such havoc.

Relighting his ‘pupils’ like a candle, his autopilot for damage control finally returned to him as he recovered (for the most part).

“my brother sure is off the charts.”

“Eheheheheh....” pure nerves controlled the scientist by this point as she tapped her fingers together, “y-yeah, b-but....it....he.....how?”

She curled in on herself as much as the chair would allow as she looked back to the monitor casting them in its spectral glow, “it...it crashed the entire system.....”

“and this is the beginning?”

Visibly flinching, the scientist nervously adjusted her glasses, glancing to the other papers.

“Y-yes...?S-sort of...”

Clenching the papers in his hand, he waited while she retrieved a few more.Some of them were more fragments that sheets.

“They-they’re n-not really...useful,” the pages shook audibly in her feeble hands before she handed them off.And she was right.

The tightness from before spread across his shoulders and down his arms, stiffening his movements as he shuffled the indecipherable readings.

“Th-that’s when everything m-malfunctioned.”

His mind struggled to fathom the possible severity of the results.This, without doubt, proved him right in the worst possible way.It was his brother that had caused the accident.And he knew by now how solid that poker face of his was.If he remembered, or already knew, there was no way to tell.

“why don’t we head upstairs for now?not much we can do with the lab like this, right?”Pulling his eyes away from the train wreck at hand, he found worried eyes watching him.

“Y-yeah.You’re right.”

They could deal with it later.If he didn’t get out of that room in the next ten minutes, there were gunna be a lot more than outages to fix.

He waited patiently for the lizard monster to make her way out first, casting one last analytical glance over the office before following her to the stairs.She didn’t seem to remember that phone call, and admittedly, it felt almost like it hadn’t happened.The feeling wasn’t unlike the ghostly hands that the reloads touched everything with, but it was stronger.Like someone trying to delete a corrupted file off a computer.

It was also disturbingly similar to the feeling Papyrus’ glasses haunted him with.What was really going on here?

And why can’t he remember?

 

 

* * *

 

  The slam from the door echoed through the corridor of the large, antiquated building.

His colleague breathed out a heavy sigh, casting a slight breeze over him as he rested a hand reassuringly on the large, furry arm.

“IT’S OKAY ASGORE!!I’M SURE WE’LL GET ALL THE HU- OR, UH, COUNCILMAN TO SIGN NEXT TIME!”

The monster beside him cast aweary glance his way, attempting a weak smile, “I do not anticipate this is a matter of patience, Papyrus.”

The goat monster rolled his shoulders back to adjust his posture, moving legs heavy with resignation as they started back towards the press room.

“NO...BUT WE CAN CERTAINLY WORK ON IT!!THEY’LL UNDERSTAND EVENTUALLY THAT MONSTERS ARE NATURALLY QUITE USEFUL!”

“You are young, my friend, and so full of hope,” Asgore turned his eyes to the fast approaching end of the hall, “but I do not believe our right to live on the surface is only justified by our serviceability to the humans.”

Slowing to a stop prematurely, he fixed his eyes on the upcoming door as well.Smile giving way to an uncertain frown, he tried to think of a response, but found himself at an unusual loss for words.Wasn’t being functional a good thing?Wasn’t any relationship, even society as a whole, based on every participant being an interlocking gear?

His focus started drifting to the unique woodworking around the doorway.It was very old, but pristine in its upkeep.

The swing of a large hand drew his attention back to the monster now a few feet ahead of him.He was inviting him to step closer, which was obliged, earning a sympathetic clasp on his shoulder.

“I did not mean to upset you.Would you still like to handle the press?You are much better in front of a camera, even a natural, if I dare say.”

Striking his most charming pose, his boisterous smile returned full force, “IT MUST BE BECAUSE OF MY SPARKLING PERSONALITY AND RUGGEDLY GOOD LOOKS!”

A more lightened smile found the taller monster as he chuckled, “Truly.”

Stepping out and into the havoc of the public eye, the ex-King guided him through the crowd and to a podium.He was used to it by now, Asgore had asked him to take the roll of public speaker from the beginning, but this time, the flashing seemed brighter, the voices seemed louder.It was jarring as he found himself stumbling slightly, smile too wide as he nervously adjusted his suit jacket and tried hopelessly to regain his composure.

It was too much.

Hands shaking, he scrambled to remove his glasses as the roar of the crowd subdued itself in patience.

With unfocus came clarity.The humans, and a few more monsters intermingled than he noticed last time, watched him with intent.But it felt manageable once again.

Five minutes turned to thirty in a blur, questions being met with whatever came to mind first, and as much honesty as he could muster.He’d lost track of time when he finally felt a nudge of the arm to let him know it was time to go.

“NO!AND BESIDES, THAT IS RIDICULOUS, MOST MONSTERS DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO SWIM.BUT THE TIME IS UP!GOOD BYE!!”

Without hesitating, he hopped down and swept up beside the goat dad awaiting him.It was almost habitual now, the way they knew how to move and where to go, even in a building they’d never been in before.

It was a short drive to the hotel, but it gave him time to readjust his glasses.The car smelled strongly of leather and clean plastic, it must be new.

The hotel had a distinct smell, too, but it’s style left little to admire.Smooth and sleek, he’d found his admiration belonging primarily to the marbled floor.A million colors laced together, flowing greens and blues and greys.But most other things were white, with little to no endearing features.

The room was nice enough, two beds, a couch, a laptop and a television.Hotel showers were always nice, even if relatively unsanitary.But there were no patterns in the rugs, or interesting paintings to interpret. 

Today would be their last day, the flight would depart by 1 am, giving them plenty of time to clean up and pack.Not that they really unpacked much in two days.

He’d texted Sans off and on, with very little confidence that his brother had followed through on setting up his hot dog stand in the park.He’d even renewed the permits and everything, in an effort to make it not one for his brother.But alas.

As coy as ever, the older skeleton was only interested in hearing about his time spent over the weekend.They hadn’t spoken yet today, but he had seemed even more vague than usual the night before, which was always cause for concern.

Moving to his suitcase, he began retrieving a more comfortable outfit when the soft click of the remote distracted him.Mr. King Asgore always waited until the last day to check the news, weary of any reports prior to their last word.Understandable.

He peered over the frame of his glasses to watch the vivid display a few feet away.Despite being the same setting as last night, it seemed louder now, the human on the live broadcast owning a...commanding tone, if not annoying.He was not the most cordial of the humans they worked with.

While ‘The Great Papyrus’ was quite talented at most things, he was always quick to forget a name, which resulted in lots of nicknames.He referred to this specific representative as Mr. Dirty Tie, since he regularly had at least one relatively noticeable stain on his tie, no matter the time or occasion.

Asgore encouraged him greatly not to call any of the others by their expertly crafted nicknames in public, which seemed odd, but he did his best not to.

A scoff from the other monster broke him out of his unfocused daze when he realized he’d listened to the tone of the voice rather than the words.Although, he quickly wished he hadn’t started.

“WHAT IS HE TALKING ABOUT?WE DIDN’T DISCUSS THAT!!”

The soft sound of shuffling was far off in his mind as the goat monster moved closer, the television pulling them both in with uneasy interest.

“THAT-THAT’S LYING!!!WHY WOULD HE...HE CAN’T DO THAT!”

The words tumbled out of the man in an unbecoming way, like he had been programmed to say such nonsense.Making up or augmenting things that were said, insisting they went over aspects that were never brought up, inferring one of the representatives who had always been open-minded to them was (falsely) doing the very things he was doing right now.

“HOW TERRIBLE!!HE DEFINITELY SHOULD NOT REPRESENT ANYTHING OUTSIDE OF ROTTEN PRODUCE!!”Crossing his arms, his foot moved practically on its own, tapping his annoyance out in a steady beat as he rattled off the counter-truths with steadily increasing venom.This man was disgracing his lovely human counterparts by behaving in such a way.

“AND IF HE REALLY THINKS, WHICH ITS OBVIOUS HE DOESN’T, THEN HE WOULDN’T-“ spinning to find validation in his frustration from his friend, a spike of surprise knocked the rest words out of his mouth.

Eyes wide with utter bewilderment matched the jaw gaping on the usually composed monster.He was no longer focused on the TV as he gawked at the skeleton before him.

“WHAT??W-WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT?!”A nervous smile forced its way onto his face.

That look perfectly mirrored the one on his brother’s face the first time he’d seen him in glasses again.

There was an uncomfortably long silence until the other finally found himself.

“Y-you were not...” he sheepishly (goatishly?) made a hopeless attempt to fix his mane of a beard, clearing his throat, “I did not know you spoke multiple languages, but I must apologize, I do not know that one.”

A heavy ache started at the base of his skull, short circuiting the smile for only a second.What was he talking about?

“THE...LANGUAGE OF BEING DISGUSTED??”It felt like a rubber-band was wrapped around his shoulders, ready to snap.

For as much composure as he tried to keep, the goat monster could not conceal the utter confusion laced dangerously with alarm consuming him.

“Were you...not aware?”

A prickling sensation danced around his soul, shooting out into his arms and down his legs.A feeling he knew well, but one that could’ve been from a lifetime ago.

“I WAS JUST SPEAKING LIKE I ALWAYS DO!!I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT!!!”

His magic was boiling under the surface, like it was new and untrained.It teetered on seething out from his bones, and for the second time in many years, he had to make a conscious effort to restrict it.It had happened before, at Toriel’s house, when Undyne broke in the door.But he beat it down then, and he can do it again now.

It was nerves.Only nerves.

“That is...not what it sounded like to me.Are you certain you did not notice?”

A roaring was building in his mind, threatening to drown out the words spoken to him.Halves of questions interrupted each other viciously as he fought to hone the anxiety.

But everything went static.

What did he just respond?What was Asgore saying?Was he moving?

He felt...under water.Or maybe buried?

Had he been speaking a different language?You can’t speak sign language, and the King knew that one anyway.What other

Languages? 

Words?

Was it dark or were his eyes closed?

Tired.

 

Awake?

 

His shoulders hurt.

Hands hurt.

His hip hurt.

 

No?

It didn’t hurt.

It was............................

buzzing.

 

*click*

“HELLO?”

“HEY, DORK!!!!!!!”Undyne.“Alphys finally managed to pull that hell-machine back together and got your results!!!AND GUESS WHAT!!!!”

Results?Alphys.

The lab.

Results.

“I SAID GUESS!!!!!!!”

“OH!SHE SAW MY DREAM ABOUT THE HOTPANTS!!”

“!!!!!!!NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Well.Maybe.BUT ANYWAY!Looks like you were right!Everything checked out!!Mostly anyway!”

The bed underneath him was plush, the pillows behind him even more plusher.The television was still on, but it looked different.Oh, it was dark out.He was in a hotel room.

“SEE!!I TOLD YOU IT WAS NOTHING TO LOSE SLEEP OVER!”

“Yeah, whatever!She also said you should still TRY to sleep more!!So you’re not gettin’ off that easy!!!”

“THE GREAT PAPYRUS DOES NOT TRY!!HE SUCCEEDS!!!NYEH HEH HEH!!!!”It hadn’t occurred to him they were still attempting to get the results.Why?

“HELL YEAH!!!! FUHUHUHUH!!”There was an odd noise in the background, but it was nearly impossible to hear through his friend’s passionately strong voice.But it certainly made it hard to focus.

“You guys ’re coming back tonight, right?”

“YES!!UH-“ pulling the phone down, he scanned the room for the tall monster, but found it empty, “ASGORE?”

No reply.He must’ve...gone...

_‘I would like to speak to Mr. Akagi before they return to the airport.I should be back before we must depart for our own flight.’_

The words were quiet, and almost foreign, but he managed to resuscitate the memory.He‘d gone back to that meeting building!

“Pap?You better not be pranking me!!!” 

“NO!NOT AT ALL!!I...JUST FORGOT WHAT TIME THE FLIGHT IS!!ASGORE WILL BE BACK IN TIME, THOUGH, I’M SURE OF IT!”

“Oh!Alright!Actually, before that, I have something else I wanted to talk to you about,” her tone dropped, not too serious, but it was the same intonation she used to use on the Guards, “I really wanna get back into regular practice with you.”

Insecurity picked at the back of his hand as he clenched the phone.Why did that warrant her ‘The Undying’ voice?

“Alphys thinks you might have broken the machine by accident.”

Oh.

“I have never, NEVER, seen you slip up with your magic like that.I guess something lit a spark in ya, cause your magic’s changing.”Was it really so obvious?

“And you need to get a handle on it.”

Every part of his body was tense, his breathing uneven, as that feeling from before started writhing free from his control.Almost as if to prove her point, faint flickers of blue magic started crawling around and up from the palm of his left hand.It was very faint, but enough to strike a paper cut of fear into his heart.

“You were sweating bullets at Toriel’s house, don’t think I didn’t notice.But I don’t think anyone else has, not even Sans-”

“S-SANS?”Why would she mention him?Was he part of this?Was he there right now?

“Yeah.He asked me how you were doing.You didn’t tell him you used orange magic?”Her voice was growing softer.She could probably hear how tight his throat was.

_Say something.Anything._

“I-“

“It’s alright.He wasn’t mad.Said you probably forgot, like the sleep study.”They both knew that wasn’t true. 

“I know you don’t wanna talk about it, so I won’t make you.But I wanna get you back in the saddle, okay?Training every weekend, and if that’s not enough, every day.Not really asking.”

“Y-YES, SIR!!”

“NOW THAT’S WHAT I LIKE TO HEAR!!”

He was grateful for his friend’s straightforwardness, but the entire situation was becoming worse than he’d realized.

What was happening to him?

“Text me when you land!And, uh,” there was more? “Al told me about that jerk from your meeting thing.You want me to hunt him down and break his kneecaps?”

“THAT SOUNDS VERY APPEALING!BUT PROBABLY DON’T DO THAT.KING FLUFFYBUNS WOULD NOT APPROVE.”

“Yeah, probably...BUT!  Keep it in mind.”

It was very difficult for Undyne to audibly wink with just the one eye, but he could tell she was giving it her all.Like she always did.

“OKAY!THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME KNOW ALL OF THAT OTHER STUFF, TOO!BYE!!”

When she wanted to be, the ex-Royal Guard was frightfully perceptive.But lying was second nature to him.She’d never guessed at something so precisely before...which meant it was more apparent than he’d realized.Of course, considering he didn’t know what ‘it’ was, it was a completely different challenge than, well, _misguiding_ about the things he always had before.

With his magic shifting so suddenly, and the nightmares bleeding into his waking hours, he’d been ‘spacing out’ more and more lately.The weird sounds, the static, and now apparently speaking languages he didn’t know?Maybe he was just slurring very badly?It was hard to say, since he hadn’t noticed.

Worst of all, he couldn’t remember anything even remotely like this happening in any other timelines.Granted, they were getting harder and harder to remember.He couldn’t remember his childhood anymore.He’d never tell Sans, of course, but anything prior to Snowdin was gone.Meshed together in a blur he couldn’t identify.

All the thoughts and worries and theories started asphyxiating him.He didn’t breathe, exactly, but the weight on his chest was crushing him, regardless.When had his magic spread up both arms?

What had been flecks and glimmers were now swathes around his forearms, casting a tint over the white of his bone.

If it had not been for the sheer panic that shocked him back into control when the door started opening, there was no telling how long it would’ve taken to reestablish it.

“It is just me, Papyrus, no need to look so frightened!”Back to his chipper self, the goat monsterstrolled into the room, “But I must apologize for cutting things so close, we really should be on our way!”

“RIGHT!WE NEED TO GET ON THE PLANE!!AND GO HOME!!!”Jumping up, the best way to keep calm was always repression!If he focused on the flight, watched a movie, crocheted like Toriel had taught him, did origami, surely it would be fine!It was always fine until he was upset, so he just had to stay non-upset!Which should be easy! 

In his ‘distant’ state, he’d organized his things earlier, making it much more convenient for hustling out the door.There was a car waiting for them outside.

He would go home, and talk to Sans.He needed to come clean.And take a shower, sheesh, three days is too many.He would also work on being more comfortable showering in a hotel.But right now, Sans.

He needed to tell him the truth.


	13. Cry As You Might

“I-I should’ve just l-let him go to a-a professional!Th-that was what we p-planned, initially, b-but....wh-why didn’t I ju-just-!”

Reaching the top of the stairwell, a gentle hand surprised the lizard monster as it clasped her shoulder.

“alphys.”Her reluctance to face him was obvious as she turned to barely meet his eyes, “you sure you wanted my bro to bake a team of humans instead of a machine?”

This did not seem to comfort her as a more panicked frown looked back to him, “Th-that wouldn’t h-have happened!”

Three days ago, he would’ve agreed.Contrary to the vaguely amused smile he gave her, a dark fear nestled into the very heart of his anxiety.Something was happening to his brother, and he had absolutely no idea what.

“you were only trying to make sure he felt safe and comfortable, right?”

Breaking eye contact, she looked somehow even guiltier, “...k-kind of...”

Clenching his jaw to avoid hurting her shoulder, the last thing he needed right now was more drama from everyone else.

“wanna elaborate?”

Clearly, she did not.But that wasn’t going to stop him from pushing.Which was easy enough to do with her, you just had to keep staring.

“I...I....”

This was a game of patience.It took about 2 minutes for her to find the confidence to meekly confess, “I don’t trust the humans.”

Well, yeah.But it was almost sweet that she considered that something to feel bad about.

“I d-didn’t want them to-to take advantage of him...”

“i see,” she flinched at his voice, eyes squeezed shut, “so you weren’t doing it to help papyrus...you were doing it to help papyrus.”

Her eyes opened, just enough for her to peer back up at him.The genuinely kind smile that she found helped her relax as much as she could.

“I...I guess.”But her frown remained.

As they started moving towards the living room again, the doctor hesitated, opting to change route and head to the kitchen.

“I’m gunna, um, make some coffee...w-would you like some?”

“sure.”

Moving upstairs had successfully diluted the disturbing presence in the lab, but it was hard to shake completely.And he didn’t think it would die down any time soon.

He watched his friend’s shaky hands as they steadied slowly while she worked.A simple task, but a nice, easy distraction, nonetheless.This wasn’t her fault, and the amount of responsibility she was taking wasn’t right, but he had no one else to turn to.Not to mention, her and Undyne were the ones that got themselves involved in the first place, so it was going to be hard to get them away from it before things spiraled.

It started with the glasses.

First, the glasses, then, the nervous behavior, then...then...the orange magic?It was still hard to believe, and even stranger that he’d try to hide it.But it didn’t end there, then he’d actually fallen asleep.At a different house, of all places.On accident.Then the phone thing, another lie about the sleep study, asking him to come despite lying earlier....and THEN he blew up the damn thing.But....

But it hadn’t just been the machine. 

Papyrus had short circuited the entire god damn lab, and that was....not good.The mini-core had taken two days to get back up and running.And now whatever had hit the first time apparently struck again...despite the fact Papyrus was no where near the lab.Almost like a computer virus.

Well, that’s assuming it was the same thing.

Oh, and he’d been disassociating again.It was usually pretty hard to notice, honestly, but he’d gotten pretty good at spotting the tells.It had gotten a lot better after he met Undyne, and hadn’t even happened more than once or twice since they’d been on the surface, but now, it was several times a week again.

What was going on in that head of his?

The gentle sound of a mug being placed on the table drew him back from his thoughts.

“It-it’s still pretty hot, so be careful.”She looked tired.

“that a metaphor for backing off until he’s ready to talk?”

A soft chuckle sounded alongside a chair being adjusted as Alphys took a seat across from him.

“Maybe?”

In the past few days, he’d fallen under the spell of old habits dying hard, and confessed a little too much of his worries.Nothing important, but he resented putting any of this kind of shit on other people.A lot.

“I-I already talked to Undyne...about the orange magic?I think we should, um, maybe tell her about the m-machine, too.”

Finally able to pull his gaze back up to watch her, she locked eyes with him.

“She could help him.”

Putting more work on them.heh.

He should say no, but what’s he gunna do?Spar with his brother experiencing spontaneous magic outbursts when he has one defense?The likelihood of anything happening was low.Less-than-1% low.But the chance was still there.

If he dies, the kid resets.

“yeah, you’re right.”He didn’t have to warn her not to tell her partner anything else considering she was almost as tight lipped as he was.Metaphorically speaking.

If he was gunna defuse this before it escalated, maybe...it was okay to ask for help.

The biggest downfall to the surface timelines was always how unpredictable they could be.But this one...his brother had never caused a reset before.Outside of being killed, anyway.At least, he couldn’t remember a time he had.So treading carefully was the only way to go.

It would also help if he could actually fucking remember the past timelines with any clarity.But that was probably the side effect of living through so many.Even his own past was starting to get watered down by it all.

“Sans?”

He was almost scowling.Relaxing his brow bone, he smiled back at the worried doctor, encouraging her to continue.

“D-do you think...Papyrus would-“

The entryway door interrupted them, opening quickly and being thrown back shut even faster.

They watched the doorway as the sound of feet approached, unsurprised when a tall, fish-like monster filled it.

“Hey!Didn’t expect to see you here so early today!”She strolled around him and to her girlfriend, gracing her forehead with a kiss, “Morning, babe!”

“Good morning.”The scientist quickly smiled at her, but her nerves got the better as she clenched her hands around her mug.

“had an important call to be up for, figured i’d stop by after.”

“Oh!Was it your dorky brother??”Procuring herself a bottle of water, she leaned against the island between them, “I texted him earlier, but all he texted back was like, 60 emojis.”

“heh, yeah.another conference, then the flight back’s tonight.”Finally taking a sip of his coffee, a strange, unfamiliar bitter taste filled his mouth.huh.

“Cool!! Or uh, I mean, whatever.”Sarcastically dampening her enthusiasm, she switched her focus back to them, “so did ya fix that exploding sleep machine yet?”

Shooting a look from under his eyelids to his old friend, she caught it before finding distinct interest in her own beverage.

“O-oh, yeah!!Well, I-I actually, or uh,” removing her glasses, the lizard watched them carefully as she cleaned their lenses, “the machine is still broken...b-but we got the results!”

“YEAH!!I knew you could figure it out, Al!And you, too, Sans.”She offered him a smile before returning her gaze to the other, leaning forward, “So what’s wrong with him, Doc?”

The scientist couldn’t quite meet either of their stares, instead closing her eyes as she smiled, “Um, w-well...”

“do you want that list alphabetical or chronological?”

“VICIOUS!!Nice!”

Laughter easing the tension, he looked back to doctor, who met his eyes with a subtle, determined nod.

“W-while I think more sleep would probably help with his nerves....the study, um, it a-actually showed no signs of negatively impacting his health.”

Undyne’s eyes widened as she listened, “Whoa, really?I wish I only needed two hours of sleep!!”Chuckling, she relaxed back up off the counter, “But that’s good, right??I’ll give him the news!”

“A-actually-!”

Undyne had already pulled her phone out when her partner nearly jumped out of her seat.

“A-actually...”

Brow furrowed slightly, the fish monster set her phone down slowly, watching the other with intent.

“...Al?”

She managed a pleading look to him before rubbing a hand against the back of her neck.But this was her place, not his.She’d seen the entire results report, not him.

“I think...I-I’m worried....” taking a deep breath, Alphys looked her partner in the eyes, “Going back o-over the results I could pull from the footage, a-and off the study, the-the machine didn’t malfunction.....Papyrus...” she glanced to him for one more confirmation, just to be sure, which he appreciated.He nodded.

“Papyrus subconsciously destroyed it.”

Undyne watched her for a moment, then looked to him.Her gaze landed back on Alphys before her face screwed up into uncertain smile.

“What?!No way!!!He’d never...” back to him, “come on!He has more control over his magic than any other monster I’ve ever known!!!” back to her, “That’s...not even possible!!”

“i think we can all agree my bro is hiding something,” turning his smile to Undyne, her overly wide one faltered, “and i plan on finding out what that is.but in the meantime, you could help him out.”

With a deep sigh, the shocked monster leaned onto her elbows, relaxing into a frown “Guess we’re all in the loop now, huh?We’re all worried about that stupid idiot...”

It wasn’t hard to see the guilt on Alphys’ face as she glanced back to him.His expression was that of caution.Knowing too much was a burden.Like they say, ignorance is bliss, and the feisty monster couldn’t hope to understand the whole truth.And hopefully wouldn’t have to.

“I’ll give him a call later,” straightening the rest of the way up, she rotated her focus between the two of them, “I have a shift at the gym in about 30, and I don’t wanna go and get him all fired up before his whatever-they’re-doing.I’ll think of something by then.”

“sounds good.” 

The scientist nodded her agreement.

Excusing herself, Undyne left to take a shower, leaving them alone once more, but there was not much left to be said.He pressed her about what she had almost said earlier, but she insisted it was nothing.And admittedly, it had probably just been a generic concern about his brother that wasn’t really applicable to the current situation.

But it was gunna bother him for days. 

If it was important, she’d text him later.He knew he still had to help her reboot the computers downstairs, and eventually, very reluctantly, they did.Nothing unusual happened.No strange black outs, or error screens, or power surges.No...wait, was it a weird text he’d gotten earlier?That didn’t sound right...but......

....

He couldn’t remember.

 

This was shaping up to be another very long weekend.

 

* * *

 

  The flight passed quickly.  Staving off boredom was second nature to him by now.  Asgore has been tired after the awkward, annoying day, falling asleep before the plane even took off.

His mind, on the other hand, was not so kind.

Distracting himself proved easy enough, but as they drew closer and closer to their destination, his worries began prying their way back into his mind.

His magic was a priority, yes, but Sans was the real concern.Being honest with each other was about the last family activity the brothers partook in.And he didn’t even have a choice, it wasn’t on his terms.His brother already knew about the orange magic.So pretending that he didn’t would only prove his guiltiness.Pressure the flames with air, so to speak.

He should have never stayed at Undyne’s. How could he have been so foolish as to fall asleep somewhere away from home?What if he’d forgotten how to get back?What if his texts hadn’t gone through and Sans had been worried?What if...what if.....

No, Sans wouldn’t have worried.He only worries about restarts, anymore.

Drawing a deep breath, he folded his laptop and slid it back into its case, sliding himself lower against the seat.The flight only had a few passengers, so he could’ve stretched out, but what good would that do?

What good did anything do?

Massaging his eye sockets with his hand, he rubbed that thought away.Acting like Sans wasn’t going to get him anywhere.But...when were his thoughts ever really his own?

_Knock it off!You’re the Great Papyrus!Ambassador for Monster-kind!!_

The Great Papyrus was important.He was kind, and brave, and strong.  He was a good friend and great brother! 

Papyrus...maybe not as much.

Was that why his magic was so out of sorts?Was it all because he was losing touch with his resolve?

Was this all because of the fight?

Was this all because of.......

His glasses?

He found he hadn’t needed to move his hand to his glasses tucked neatly into his shirt; it was already there, toying anxiously with the frame.A chill washed over him as he corrected himself, crossing his arms over his chest.

He needed to calm down.He needed to think rationally.He was being ridiculous.And not in the right way.

With another sigh, he shifted back upright.A heavy feeling pulled on him, that familiar tired ache that always followed him.On purpose this time, he reach a hand back to the glasses pressed against his chest, taking them out and unfolding them.

His reflection looked gaunt and glassy in the lenses, but...the faint colors granted a life to him that he couldn’t see elsewhere.He looked pretty good in pastel.

Lifting them up, he looked through himself and over the rows ahead.A single blue light, with piercing intensity, blocked out his right eye.

The itch in his hands had melted away by the time he nestled the spectacles back into his shirt.He didn’t need to think about things like that right now, so he wasn’t going to.

Instead, he focused on restitching a busted seam along his glove.Careful, tedious work.The perfect kind for not thinking about...well, anything.Just the gloves.A lovely, soft pair of gloves the monster beside him had gifted him shortly after arriving to the surface.

He loved gloves.Sans always bought him gloves.Now everyone else did, too.They sure do come in _handy_.

 

The morning had come and gone by the time he pulled into their driveway.It was a bright, sunshineful Monday afternoon, one he’d normally take advantage of.But his enthusiasm had been drained after spending the majority of the morning thinking about his brother and what to say to him.

And, admittedly, he was starting to feel the effects of sleeping three hours total in the span of...five days?6?How many days ago had the sleep study been?

Regardless, if he could get some of this off his chest, maybe...maybe he might even be able to get a nap out of it.

Forgoing his luggage, he made his way up the porch.His caution was negated by his contradictory relief in seeing his brother again.Surely, they could work something out.They always did.And it almost always earned him a hug.Albeit at the price of some pretty dreadful puns.But it would be worth it.

“SANS!!I’M BACK!!!”The poorly ‘fixed’ door sounded off almost as loudly as he pushed it in, padding softly into the house.

He waited, expecting the shorter skeleton to appear before him, in his usual, lackadaisical fashion.But seconds ticked by into minutes.

“SANS??”Stepping further into the main hallway, he checked the dining room, “I’M HOME!!!!”Then the living room.Then his office.Then the kitchen.

The silence turned to static in his head.Sans had never not been waiting for him when he got back from a trip.

“SANS?!?” 

His pulse rose steadily as he cleared the stairs in a single, gravity defying bound, but the rooms upstairs proved to be vacant as well.Where could his brother be?

Pinpricks on his palm were enough to shake him back to attention, fighting the panic swelling in his chest.He probably forgot, maybe he was at Grillbys getting ready for the night shift.Maybe he was with Alphys.He could’ve just gone over to Toriel’s to hang out.His brother might be lazy, but he wasn’t a homebody.Most of the time, anyway.

Still, there was one place he hadn’t checked...

Collecting himself to the best of his abilities, with a deep breath, he headed for the worst room of the house; the basement.

Sans insisted it was storage, _only storage!_ , but the number of mysterious boxes, machines, and that awful teal crate implied much more than that.Of course, it was rare to find him here, he hated it almost as much as his younger brother.

Out the back door and to the side, he was quick to retrieve the hidden key.Hands shaking, his nerves spiked as he cautiously unlocked the door and pulled it open.

“S-SANS?”The stairs were loud, louder than the door.The light was in the middle of the room, but the sun shown brightly enough that he (thankfully) didn’t need it.His brother wasn’t here, either.

Eyes adjusting, the flutter in his chest calmed as the silhouettes turned into lifeless old boxes.A smattering of random objects were cluttered throughout, as well. 

Oh, so this was where he’s been hiding the lawn tools.

Sighing his defeat, he sat back onto the stairs.

He could see specks of dust floating through the rays of light.So small and feathery, the way they drifted without falling.Who knew you could practically see the air?

...pretty much everyone but him.

These glasses were a good thing.His life was better with them.He adored the crisp, fine lines, and the breathtaking hues everything was steeped in.He could see all the clouds in the sky and count the blades of grass, if he wanted to.He could see the texture in the bone of his brother’s skull, every thread of silky fur on the Dreemurrs.

He could feel and smell and think so much more clearly!

Could they really have impacted his life so negatively as well?

Maybe the reason Sans didn’t like them had more merit than he’d considered.The older monster would never say so.Obviously.If all of this could’ve been avoided with a little _transparency_ , they’d never know.

Like he was one to talk.

Forcing down the sharp anxiety, he found his phone in his back pocket.Dialing his brother’s number without room for hesitation, he lifted the phone to the side of his head.Immediately, he wished he hadn’t.

The wrong number song rang out in its usual, off puttingly cheerful fashion, sending a cool chill down his entire body.

That wasn’t possible.He’d never misdialed Sans.Ever.

Starting over, the mocking tune struck something deep in his psyche, and before he could think, the small device in his hand was shattered against the far wall of the room.

Standing rigid at the stairs, he watched the spot it struck with a flicker of electric light before falling to the floor.It was not possible, he had dialed the right number.He knew he had.So why...

Why?

_Why not?_

The cement floor was hard as his knees hit it, legs giving way, leaving him sitting alone, in the dark, staring at a broken phone that he threw out of...anger?Fear?Frustration?

Why would he break his own phone?

Wait...what was...

Tears.Tears were streaming down his face.Hot and wet and- using his forearm, he wiped his face, letting his glasses clattered to the floor. He just wanted to see his brother.He needed things to feel okay again, even if it was just for a few minutes.

Where would he be?Why couldn’t he just be here?

His mind was racing but he wasn’t thinking anything.The tears kept coming, and the most he could manage was to hold his face.He felt like a child again, crying for no real reason, begging for his big brother to tell him it was going to be okay.It was pathetic, really.

Any concept of time washed away with his focus, and he stopped trying to pull himself together.It was okay to cry sometimes, as long as he was alone, right?

 

They were on the surface, he was supposed to be happy.He’s supposed to be helping.He’s supposed to be-

 

Something was moving him.Some one was moving him.Softly, carefully.A hand on his shoulder, rocking him gently.

The crying had since tapered, but his face was still hot and sticky.He tried hard not to think about how ridiculous he probably looked as he pulled his head up to meet the face of...a concerned friend.

‘Papyrus?What’s wrong?Are you okay?’The human Frisk was knelt beside him, only removing their hand from his shoulder to sign.

“O-OH!FRISK!I’M SORRY!”Wiping his face with the back of his hand was a fruitless endeavor, but he collected himself enough to notice that they were...in the living room?

‘Did something-‘

“NYO, NO!N-NOT AT ALL!!” He barely stumbled pushing himself to his feet, “THE MOVIE ON THE PLANE RIDE WAS JUST SO-IT WAS SO SAD!!THAT POOR LITTLE DOG JUST WANTED TO GET HOME!!!”

They watched him intently as they followed suit, standing in front of him.Their brows still furrowed in concern, their hands moved more slowly.

‘Papyrus.What happen?’A pause for contemplation, ‘Where’s Sans?’

A subtle cringe was all the child needed to figure it had something to do with his brother.And the lack of answer didn’t help either.

Maintaining his smile, he clasped his hands together in attempt to help him focus, “S-SANS?RIGHT!I’M...NOT SURE!!I JUST GOT...HOME...BUT HE-HE-“

The impossible became possible as fresh tears began welling in his eye sockets.Was he shaking?How unbecoming.

Eyes closed, he couldn’t bare watching Frisk see him like this, but a small hand worked it’s way between his own, tempting him to look.

Their face was soft, worried, but above all else, calm.They led him to the couch, sitting beside him in reassuring silence.Waiting patiently for him to get it together.

What a disaster.

After half a dozen failed attempts, he found his breath slowing, vision clearing.Everything ached in that, that sickly way.His chest felt weak, and his throat tight.This.This was why he didn’t cry.It was dreadful.And his head was worst of all.It felt like it was splitting open.

Motion in the corner of his eye drew his attention back to the human beside him, they were signing again.

‘When was the last time you slept?’

“UM.NOT IMPORTANT!BUT...I’M OKAY NOW!!.” smiling to them, he couldn’t completely focus, the pain numbing his thoughts.

Standing, Frisk took his hand again, imploring him to follow.Against his better judgment, he did.They went upstairs, to his bedroom, where the small human guided him to his own bed.

‘Sleep.’

“WH-NO!I-I CAN KEEP-“

‘Sleep now.’

He knew that look well.They were determined, and nothing would change their mind at this point.

Sighing his defeat, he lied down.Their hand slipping out of his, an overwhelming sense of panic consumed him.He didn’t want to sleep.He didn’t want to dream.He didn’t want to see those things and think and fight or- he didn’t want to go back to that awful place or hear those awful noises or-

A warm pressure along his side snapped him out of his downward spiral.Lying beside him, Frisk recaptured his other hand, watching him thoughtfully.

‘I’ll be here when you wake up, okay?’They signed into his palm.

It took everything he had left not to start crying again.

Fighting back the merciless onslaught of tears, he turned onto his side, facing them.They had gotten somewhat bigger since they’d all arrived on the surface, but they were still...quite small.

A strangled laugh escaped him, “I’M SUPPOSED TO TAKE CARE OF YOU!”

They smiled so kindly to him, ‘Friends take care of each other.’

The warmth in his arm spread all over, filling him with a sense of genuine peace.There was truly something magical about this human.They were honestly, immeasurably special.

The urge to thank them was lost to his fleeting consciousness.There was a chance he’d underestimated just how tired he’d been.But sleep took him finally, the room fading to black as his eyes fell shut.

He could thank them when he woke.


	14. Bar None

  The rhythmic throb in his skull drew him out of a restless sleep.Hard, cool metal pressed against him, the kind of feeling he was familiar with but held no nostalgia for. 

With a sharp inhale, his body resisted as he picked his face up off the lab desk.Not a great place for a nap, but he hadn’t exactly planned to take one.He wasn’t his brother, two days without sleep was his limit.

The chair cried out as he stretched backwards, his back feeling similarly unhappy.Rubbing both eye sockets, a yawn possessed him.He was still dead tired, so he’d probably only been asleep for a couple of hours.Fishing his phone from his pocket, the light was almost blinding in contrast to the dim lab. 

Or maybe it had been more than a couple...

Nearly fourteen hours had passed since the last time he’d checked, which couldn’t have been too long before falling unconscious.And also meant he’d been here for almost twenty four hours by now.

After helping Alphys reboot everything in her own lab, he reluctantly decided to continue his search for clues in the good ol’ “true lab”.

After several dramatic short cuts, he’d practically collapsed outside the old laboratory.He was grateful that Hotland was more like Warmland these days as he rested outside on the ground, waiting for his strength to come back to him.Or whatever was left of it anyway.

It didn’t take long to get bored of that, forcing himself back onto shaky legs and heading in to the abandoned building.

In the past week, he’d spent his first two trips back struggling to remember, and rediscovering, the hidden corridors and offices he used to know like the back of his hand.This time, he planned to focus on exploring the places he’d already gained access to.Regardless of how ceaselessly frustrating it was knowing he hadn’t quite remembered everywhere yet.

With so many files half destroyed by time and computers he couldn’t get back online, he felt like he was back pedaling, making so little progress while more and more questions arose.A day wasted.

And now he wouldn’t even be home when Papyrus got there.Great.

His joints were stiff as he made a vain effort to get up quickly.Frustration felt thick against the backs of his ribs as he looked around himself.A moderate mess looked back, but in spite of his efforts held no results. 

And the worst of it all was that he didn’t even know what he was looking for.What was he missing?What couldn’t he remember?Why did that weird handwriting give him such a god damn headache?

With a deep sigh, he rolled his shoulders, pulling his hoodie off the back of the chair, and resigning himself to his failure, he slid it back on as he started toward the exit.

Discouraged and unwilling to strain himself again so soon, he decided on walking.It would take a while to get back to the Ruins, but he had a ridiculous tangle of thoughts to keep him distracted.

Every question he tried to answer only led to more questions.He was lost in a house of halls.And even the answers he could come up with were all hypotheticals.Everything depended on his brother, and knowing how honest he usually was meant there was practically a zero percent chance he’d get anything concrete.

He was going to have to be direct.His absolute least favorite thing to be.But they were running out of time.They’d already managed to regress so much in just under two weeks, it would be dangerous to let it play out any longer.

But damn did he just want to go to Grillby’s and pass out for another twelve hours.Wasn’t really an option, though.

That looming purple door...now, that did give him some nostalgia.He almost missed...A bitter twinge in his stomach reminded him that pining for the ease of the redundancy in the past was a very dangerous thing.

But was it?Was life in the Underground really so bad?Where they were safe from the humans and his brother was...where they were all.....

_damn it._

With a flash of blue magic, he was outside of Mt. Ebott.A sickening humor could be found in how tempting it was to consider the “easy” route.He really couldn’t be mad at the human, now could he?How hypocritical would that be?

Then again, he’d never choose to do what they’d done.But that was in the past.And right now, he needed to make sure it stayed there.

He found a natural tide between walking and jumping, alternating enough to quarter his travel time without exhausting his legs or his soul.Within an hour and a half, he was back in their neighborhood, a short enough distance from their house that he decided to finish it up with a short cut.

The bright red paint of his brother’s car caught his eyes before anything else, a subtle disappointment pressing down on his shoulders.Sometimes flights got delayed, but not that one.He’d probably get a lecture for ‘passing out at Grillby’s’ again, which wouldn’t be the best welcome home, but then again, neither was an empty house.So it would be well deserved.

Even with taking his time, his legs were still sore from the unusual increase in physical activity he’d been partaking in lately.It was made sharper by the stairs as he ambled up the porch and through the front door.

Expectation held him in the entryway after he shoved the door shut, awaiting the, uh....noise, his brother usually made at his untimely returns.Sometimes it was happy.Usually it was annoyed.While amusing most of the time, he wasn’t exactly looking forward to it right now.

But nothingness wasn’t exactly better.Only silence melted into his skull.

“pap?”A few steps in and he peaked into the rooms he could.No sign his brother had even come through were apparent.Which was...unnerving.

“papyrus?”Even his calls sounded soft compared to the commanding volume of the other skeleton.But he certainly would have been heard by now.

Stepping toward the staircase, an unexpected light distracted him.Was the back door open?Changing course for the backyard, he realized how tight his chest had been getting.heh.And here he’d almost started working himself up over...

Nothing...

The yard was as empty as the house.But the open door that caught his periphery fixed him to the spot. _why...would papyrus..._

The tension returned with a fury, spreading up through his neck and shoulders as he inched closer to the wide-open basement door.His frame broke up the strip of sunlight stretching into the room, highlighting the stairs all the way to the far wall.It only took a moment for his eyes to adjust as he took each step with caution.

“...papyrus?”

Stepping onto the cement floor, something underfoot stopped him before he pressed down with weight.Whatever it was, it was small and delicate and...

It was the glasses.

Going cold, dread washed over him.A million memories fighting to cast horrible premonitions into his thoughts.Thoughts that wouldn’t come to him.Almost in a daze, his eyes followed his shadow to another unexpected find.Something laid broken on the other side of the room.

Distractedly picking up the specs at his feet, he drifted to the device shattered against the wall.A cellphone.Papyrus’ cellphone.

Alphys had been the sole developer of the cellphones most monsters used today, and she’d made them...very durable.His brother would’ve had to really want that thing destroyed to do the number on it that he had.

If it was his brother’s work at all.

A lightheaded calm possessed him.He’d grown accustomed to not panicking.Especially on his own.But this was looking about as bad as it could.

The roaring in his mind was smothered out by focus.He would check upstairs first, then contact Asgore.There was no reason to believe...

Taking a shortcut to the top of the stairs inside, he crept to his brother’s bedroom.Apprehension slowed him, everything else drowned out by the high pitch ringing in his skull as he twisted the cool handle and pushed the door in.

“...pap?”

His legs went weak with relief when his eyes found the monster laying motionless in bed.He’d just been sleeping.heh.heheheheh.

  His breath hitched when a face popped up from the other side of his brother.

“kid?wha-“

Sighing into an airy chuckle, he watched as the child eased silently off the mattress and made their way to meet him as he came further into the room.

“you two having a s- _lumbar_ party in here?”

‘Where were you?’

Their expressions were always on the more vague side, but he could tell by the flick of their wrist there was a hint of annoyance to their ‘tone’.

“just had a few things to take care of.shouldn’t i be asking why you’re here?”

‘It’s the first week of summer vacation.’

The first- _oh.whoops._

“school’s out already?sheesh, sorry, kid.”Mussing their hair, his smile eased into a more sincere one.Frisk always spent the first few days of summer vacation with them, after their, uh, ‘parents’ gave em back up.But given the past few weeks, both he and his brother had completely lost track of their schedules. 

Not that he really bothered keeping track of his, but usually Papyrus was good at keeping both.

‘Where were you?’

“you’re getting bossy, kid.you’ve been spending too much time with my brother.”

The rustle of sheets drew their attention before he could answer, but the younger monster remained asleep.When Frisk’s eyes fell back on him, their brows were raised in a soft furrow.

‘He was really upset when I got here.’

“you know him, he can be pretty over the-“

‘About you.’

The perma-smile on his face slanted.About him?What did he-?

‘I think he really needed to talk to you about something because he was crying.’

Crying?Crying??Papyrus didn’t cry.  Not seriously.  He hadn’t cried since he was a babybones, with very few exceptions.Let alone twice in two weeks.Nerves tightened his throat, nearly impossible to swallow down.

“heh.well, you know, he, uh, probably just spilled some milk or some-“

Opalescent blue light interrupted him, flourishing up between them.Both souls rose atop their chests, magic completely enshrouding them.Only then did he notice the labored breathing from the monster across from them, now curled entirely in on himself.

“kid, don’t move.”

Otherwise motionless, they nodded their acknowledgement.Fighting down the urgency welling in his chest, the awful pressure of blue magic stifled his arm as he struggled to raise it from his side.

He anchored all his focus on his brother; flinching, gasping, caught in a nightmare he might make a reality.If he messed this up, things could go south fast.Held frozen in place by the very monster he needed to get to, he was out of options.

Closing his eyes for a breath, the skeleton willed away his fear, letting intent guide his mind.Opening his hand, a welcome tension filled the space between.He couldn’t see it, but he knew he’d successfully turned his brother blue.

With measured pressure, he ever so carefully pressed down on the monster, in as comfortingly a way as he could.

“pap, papyrus, you gotta wake up.”His voice came out strained, but he maintained as much steady as he could.

“papyrus, bro, wake up.”

Just a little more pressure...

“bro, wake-!”

Bolting upright, the magic on their souls went out like a light as a desperate plea filled the room.

“ _ **WAIT-!!**_ ”

Covered in sweat and entirely out of breath, Papyrus’ manic stare softened as he drank in his surroundings. 

Before he could think, Frisk was at his brother’s side, reaching out but stopping just short of contact.He closed the distance, taking their hand, smiling as he attempted to catch up with his breath.

“HUMAN, I‘M SORRY TO HAVE STARTLED YOU!I DIDN’T-“

“did a little bit more than startle there, bro.”

Disoriented, his brother glanced around until his eyes found him, stepping closer to the bed.

“SANS!WHEN DID YOU-“

“couple minutes ago.”Climbing up onto the mattress, Papyrus slid back to allow space for both him and the human.

“i think we should probably post- _bone_ your sleepover, kid.cause it might end up more like a sleep game over.”

“WHAT IN THE UNDERGROUND IS-“

The taller skeleton’s attention was taken by the tug on his hand, glancing back to the human before they started signing.

‘It’s okay, Papyrus.You two have some stuff to work out.’

Leaning into a hug, Frisk patted him supportingly, his brother looking even more confused as he reciprocated before letting them slide off the bed.They didn’t get very far before turning back to him and-

‘Hallway.’

_great_.

“‘brb’, as the kids say.”Shifting off the mattress, he followed the child out into the hallway, huddling close to the stairs for privacy’s sake.

‘Just.Talk to him.He’s scared.’

They were right.He knew that.But every time he tried, it felt like...like deja vu.Like they’d done this before.

Like talking about it would make everything worse.

But this hadn’t happened before, right?He’d have remembered this one, right?Then why does it feel like he’s been here before?

“i can try, kid.but no promises.”

Their slanted frown and furrowed brows exhibited their premature disappointment better than words, hands dropping to their sides.He genuinely didn’t expect the hug that followed.But he hugged back, nonetheless.

They were right.

He waited until he heard the front door shut behind them to head back to his brother, who had since shifted to press his back against the top of the amusingly car-shaped bed.He held one knee to his chest, the other half buried under the sheets while he stared out the window on the far wall. 

He was still wearing a suit, just without the jacket.He hadn’t even changed when he got home, which made sense if he’d had a breakdown about finding the house empty.

“let’s get you out of the clown clothes and into something more comfortable, okay, bro?”

Papyrus was slow to draw his gaze back to him, that hollow sort of look desaturating his normally brightly expressive eyes.

“actually, all of your clothes are kinda clown clothes.so let’s just focus on the comfy part.”

The younger monster watched as he sifted through the dresser, not bothering to defend himself against the prod.His episodes were usually worse after a nightmare that bad.But he’d never...managed something like _that_ before

How had he turned them both blue?

Finally retrieving one of his brother’s few full length t-shirts and a pair of surprising soft shorts, he returned to the bed with his findings.

“how’s this look?”

“KIND OF LIKE CLOTHES.”

Chuckling at the joke, he earned a smile from the other as he took the outfit.

Climbing over his brother and back onto the bed, he stretched out and closed his eyes.The shift as his brother stood felt odd, but it was only about a minute or two before the weight returned.When he pried his tired eyes back open, he found his brother in the exact same position, now wearing the clean clothes, like a bad magic trick.

This was it.This was the opportunity.He needed to take it.They needed...he needed to just......

“SANS?”There was a pause before the other looked back to him, but when he did, the presence was back in his expression.

“WHAT DID YOU MEAN?”

Suddenly that didn’t feel like a good thing.Oh boy.

“i meant...your clothes are pretty over the top.but in a funny way that brings joy to all the little monsters and humans.”

The younger skeleton attempted a scowl, but couldn’t really muster sincere annoyance through the concern.

“YOU KNOW THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT.”

Apprehension weighed on him like the ocean.He was drowning at the bottom, and the only way up was to swim.But he was so tired. 

Weren’t surface timelines supposed to be the easy ones?

Garnering enough strength to sit back up, he looked back to the dresser he’d been in front of moments ago.No coherent thoughts would come to him, only half angry, half desperate pleas for all of this to just stop.

The idea of a reset was horrible.Exhausting to the point of absolute failure.But the idea of fighting whatever had been building in the past weeks...was it worse?Not knowing where this line would lead them?Would it be easier to fight a familiar enemy?

The sunset flooded the room with rustic tones of gold and copper.Not unlike the judgement hall he’d grown so weary of, yet totally different at the same time.

The room around them...never fully moved into from how busy his brother had been since arriving to the surface, was adorned by the same flag, same bed, same bookcase.But it was totally different at the same time.

Up until the past month, everyone had been so happy.Even Papyrus.Like a dream, everything became what it was supposed to be.Except for him.Waiting for the inevitable.

He always enjoyed the company of strangers, of Toriel, even the kid, when he relaxed enough.And, despite how tiresome their respective acts could be, he could never truly tire of his brother.Even at his most straining.In the end, they were all each other had.All they’d ever have.

It was so easy to forget the resets weren’t just about him, to be honest.It felt so personal, sometimes.But it was about everyone.Including Papyrus.Especially Papyrus.So he couldn’t give up.Not really.

“i never know what’s really going on in that head of yours.”Every world felt like it was overflowing out of him, thick and relentless, like old blood from a reopened wound, “you’re really startin’ to scare me, pap.”

He could feel the eyes boring into the side of his skull, he could feel when they turned away from him.

“i don’t know what’s going on, but whatever it is...i know i’m not gunna win brother of the year, ya know?”

It was burning a hole in his stomach, his voice.Dripping out from behind his motionless mouth.Why was this so terrifying?What was he so scared of?

Daring a glance back to the other, he found his gaze fixated on the same spot across from them.

“you...you don’t always have to be ‘great’.sometimes you can just be....”

Rolling his knees to his side, he leaned closer, focusing on his own hands, “sometimes you can just be.”

The deafening silence that filled the room was louder than his breathing.Even the soft breeze outside could drown out his thoughts.But not the anxiety brimming in his skull.

A slender hand wrapped steadily around his own, succeeding in pulling his focus back up to the monster staring down at him.His eyes were soft, tired.In his worst nightmares, they mirrored his own, as they did now.Decades beyond the age of his body; he was  _tired_ .

Facing him wholly, a skull atop broad shoulders cut through the sunlight burning like a supernova moments before collapse.It colored the monster in rich shadows reminiscent of a dream he used to have.Looking at him with soft, aching eyes, the hand around his own tightened.It felt strong and gentle at the same time.

What happened to the curious little skeleton who looked at him like he was the sun and the moon?When had he died?How had he missed the Phoenix rising from his ashes?From his _dust_.

“SANS...”

Another hand wrapped around his shoulder, guiding him forward until his face pressed against thin fabric and a warm rib cage, his brother enveloping him in a hug.He felt his arms instinctively fold around the other, pulling himself somehow closer.

All that he wanted was to feel safe.Like he’d succeeded.Like it would be easier from now on.But his talent for prescience indicated otherwise.Heart breaking trepidation took hold as he realized what this meant.

This was only the beginning.The beginning of yet another ending.

Thought drained from his as he focused on feeling.The arms closed firmly around him, the rumpled sheets against his shins, the skull pressed against the top of his own.He’d never been in control, not really.But it was a nice daydream.To think he could’ve prevented this.

“I STILL DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT.I’M ALWAYS GREAT...”

Leaning back only enough to see each other’s eyes, the smile on his brother’s face hit him like a fist.

“BUT I LOVE YOU, BROTHER.I’M SORRY FOR WORRYING YOU.”

He could’ve yelled.Could’ve thrown something.Broken something.Summoned a blaster and melted the entire back wall of the house.A frustration so concentrated there was even a millisecond he questioned stopping himself.But he had a lot of practice dousing those flames.

He should’ve told him he almost hurt them.Should’ve told him how obviously bad it was getting.Told him he needed to talk to someone, anyone, about what was happening.Maybe...maybe he should have asked.But it was too much to keep trying.Trying to talk with Papyrus about things felt like standing in a grave you were digging with him, sometimes.

This attempt had backfired enough, and sleep would be much more forgiving.

Letting his head fall back against his brother’s chest with a muffled clink, he closed his eyes.

“just try and remember that i love you, too.doofus.”

In the calm of the moment, he could almost forget the pulse-stopping incident that had preceded it all.But the disturbing reality of the situation held firm at the edges of his mind. 

It had never felt so jarring to see blue magic before in his life.How had the monster managed collecting both souls in one action?Unconscious, to boot.Maybe this was another case of better-off-without-interference.And if that were true, could he have been making it worse the whole time?A self fulfilling prophecy?

He needed sleep.

And sleep would find him.Lost to the clutches of his mind, his worries and questions grew fewer and farther in between as he let his brother’s embrace carry him into another uneasy, empty sleep.


	15. Somewhere Out There

The blazing golds and reds that dyed the room faded into sepia within minutes.The shadows stretched longer until even the light could barely reach the opposite wall.A muted blue leached any remaining color as the light finally retired behind the horizon.

His arms had grown stiff in the time it took, the room bathed in darkness before he made any attempt at motion.Brother gathered in his arms, he found his footing beside the bed and stood.

He couldn’t actually recall the last time he’d seen his brother sleep in his own bedroom, he seemed to favor the couch, so with practiced care, he headed for the living room.

Despite how tired his body was, the weight felt good in his arms, pressing against him.He liked taking care of Sans.Nothing filled him with a sense of purpose like his brother did.But now, he was failing.

In all of his self indulgent worrying, he’d lost track of just how important his roll was.Is.Even though just about everyone else’s dreams had been realized, there was still one monster who needed hope.Who needed him more than ever.

And he was failing.

In all of the resets.In all of the errors.In all of the times he’s looked death in the eyes and felt his body start crumbling beneath him.He never gave up.He never faltered.Joyously reading letters from ghosts, painting the same bridge on the same rock face humming the same song, sitting alone in the ruins while he waits for the return of their true caretaker.

As tattered and worn and broken as those memories were becoming, they were still a reminder.The only real purpose he served was to keep them all hopeful.Keep them from Falling.Keep  him from Falling.

And he was failing.

Retrieving a blanket from the linen closet upstairs, he made his way back to the couch, laying it ever so gently over the exhausted skeleton.A monster who didn’t deserve the fate he was awarded. 

Mind numb from years of rehearsed behavior, he crept back up the stairs to his bedroom.Why was it that sleep always drained him further?This time especially.Whatever had been clambering around his skull felt like it had almost broken free.However impossible that would be for a nightmare, it left him cold.

Oh, but that was it, wasn’t it?It wasn’t a nightmare.Not really.

Somewhere in the furthest reaches of his mind - of his soul - he knew that.The things he saw, the voices he heard.There was no legitimate chance it was nothing more than a bad dream.

And whatever he’d done to tip the scales...he could feel it growing.The orange magic came from somewhere deeper, somewhere his brother had taught him to bury.To bury all of it.And that had worked for so long...but now the ground was crumbling.He’d unearthed it somehow, as much as he tried to deny it.

No, of course I can’t use orange magic!Of course I don’t know about science-y things!Of course this is home!Of course I love you!Of course I could never hurt...someone.......

What was happening to him?

So many thoughts and memories that couldn’t reach him were still desperately struggling to maintain their places in his mind.Without success, though.He could feel them slipping further and further away.

He might be grateful of that, if it didn’t leave so many infuriating holes in everything.

What had he been thinking about?The magic?The...the nightmare...

Or was it...no, it was the magic.

Undyne wanted to help.His magic was out of sorts and she was going to help him.

............

An aching suspicion told him he’d summoned an attack in his sleep, earlier.What else could Sans have been so worried about?Perhaps...he needed more than sparring. 

He’d gotten out of the habit of using magic frequently, even in day to day living, as his brother had taught him.Practice was important in order to keep it reigned in.

He and his brother were not like other monsters.Alphys hadn’t been wrong about that.

As for the nightmares....a gnawing similarity drew him back to the Underground.The static in his head wasn’t unlike what used to dog him in Hotland, so it stood to reason there were answers to be found there.

Only he could control whatever had taken hold of him.The key lied in figuring out exactly what that was.But he’d have to work twice as hard to be discrete.Get better at balancing personal time with time spent around others.Be fast enough that he can keep both completely separate.

Work harder.Do better.Be faster.

He’d gone through too much to be overcome by this now.He had zero intentions of becoming another cause for concern.

He was determined to make things right.

The sun would rise again soon, and it would be a new day.It would be Tuesday already.Time moved too quickly to lose track of, and the past few days had slipped between his fingers like...like....water?

He’d been wasting too much time lately.It was about time to rearrange his schedule.

 

* * *

 

A hum, muffled and distant, stirred his consciousness from the depth of a now forgotten dream.He let the sound fill his skull, drowning out any budding thoughts his mind attempted to produce.

For the first time in weeks, the faint strings of waking were all that tired him.Whether it was pure fatigue or a genuine sense of peace that allowed him to rest, he did not know, but the song in the air and the warmth of the blanket half kicked off comforted him in a way he hadn’t been in years.

Minutes passed as the tranquil moment held him.He’d lost track of how long he’d been awake by the time a loud clatter from another room piqued his interest enough to open his eyes.

The humming never failed, so it must have been with purpose, whatever had happened.But now, fully awake and curious, he slid the throw off and sat up.Woozy from the sudden motion, he took his time before testing the waters of standing.

He felt lighter.The ache in his neck that could never quite be readjusted was gone altogether.This wasn’t just the effects of a good night’s sleep.He might have even felt  good .Papyrus had used healing magic on him.

It almost tickled him that his brother had been so concerned, but the amusement mellowed as the memories of why trickled back to him.

Yesterday had really been something else.

Rolling his neck out of habit, he began following the sounds of life that led him to the kitchen.Sure enough, his brother was cooking in his usual haphazard way; taking things from the fridge, putting things back, catching things just before they fell from the crowded counter.A sight he hadn’t seen in almost a month.

“mornin’”

Without looking over his shoulder, the skeleton started pouring things into a bowl, “IT’S NEARLY FOUR O’CLOCK, LAZYBONES!”

“asterisk; afternoon.”

That one earned him a swift glare.

Meandering over, he watched his brother add the final ingredient to his mixture before setting it aside and reaching for a new vessel.Looked like he was making lasagna.

“AFTER THIS IS IN THE OVEN, I’LL NEED YOU TO TAKE IT OUT.I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT IN THE CITY, BUT I WANTED TO HAVE DINNER UNDERWAY BEFORE I LEFT.CAN YOU MANAGE TO NOT FALL BACK ASLEEP BEFORE THEN?”

Stepping away from the counter, he shrugged as he moved to grab a drink from the fridge.

“i can try.it’s not _impastable_.”

“HMM,” tapping a finger to his chin, the taller skeleton looked to him inquisitively, “IN PASTA BOWL?”

“heh.yeah, in pasta bowl.”

Leaning against the appliance, he tried to ignore the lingering guilt that pried at the edges of each thought.He just needed to back off.The magic thing wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t interrupted.Papyrus was strong, he could handle this.And he’d just need to keep reminding himself of that.

The skeleton before him, speckled with tomato sauce and spices, was more capable than he let on.He deserved the trust.Right?

Yes. 

Yeah....

It would be better if he backed off.

It was always easier when he didn’t interfere.

“what kind of appointment?”

The monster’s full focus was back on his task, mixing something more carefully as he wiped his glasses with the back of his glove.

“ASGORE WANTS ME TO SPEAK WITH SOMETHING CALLED ‘THE SCHOOL BOARD’ ABOUT INCORPORATING MONSTER HISTORY INTO THE CURRICULUM.WHICH I WHOLEHEARTEDLY EMBRACE!!”

Tapping his spoon clean on the side of the bowl, he flicked it at the older monster in accentuation, “HUMAN CHILDREN SHOULD LEARN THE IMPORTANCE OF MAGIC AND PUZZLES AND HOW TO SURVIVE CENTURIES TRAPPED UNDERGROUND!!”

Chuckling as he wiped the fine spray of residual sauce off his cheekbone, he shifted toward the table as his brother continued.

“OF COURSE THE MEETING WON’T BE TODAY.I HAVE TO GET APPROVAL FIRST.PREAPPROVAL.THERE ARE MANY STEPS IN THEIR INTRICATE DECISION MAKING SYSTEM.THEY SHOULD REALLY CONSIDER JUST HAVING A KING WITH MOSTLY DECENT JUDGEMENT!”

Carrying his completed dish to the oven, he glanced over his shoulder as he set the timer, “AND WHY AREN’T YOU USING A COASTER?”

“huh?oh, heh, sorry,” sliding his drink to the nearest rectangular piece of cork, a funny thought crossed his mind.

“we’ve always had coasters, but you never called me out on using them before,” picking at the edge of it, his smile waned, “guess you couldn’t tell?”Averting his gaze, he focused on the beads of condensation rolling down the can.

“how, uh, how bad is your  vision, bro?”

The taller monster had since tossed his oven mitts back onto the counter, sorting everything back into its rightful cupboard.He stopped at the question, glancing back to the asker.

“I DON’T REALLY KNOW!THE DOCTOR SAID IT WAS A GOOD THING I HADN’T WALKED INTO TRAFFIC YET, SO I TOLD HIM ABOUT THE TIME-“

“i- did he give you any numbers...?”

Setting down the spices, Papyrus brought a curled pointer finger to his chin, “I...I THINK I REMEMBER A 100?SINCE THAT USUALLY MEANS PERFECT FOR OTHER TESTS!BUT I GUESS NOT VISION ONES!”Returning to his task at hand, he missed the other’s eye-lights flicker out, “THEY SHOULD ALSO RECONFIGURE THEIR SYSTEM...TO SOMETHING LESS CONTRADICTORY!”

20/100?No, that couldn’t be right...His vision wasn’t that bad.Was it?

“that explains your fashion sense.”

As he finished soaking a bowl, his brother spun around and flicked water at him.

“IF WE’RE TALKING ABOUT  _SHORT_ COMINGS, THAT WOULD BE YOUR DEPARTMENT.”

“ouch.” Taking a dismissive sip from his drink, he tried to ignore the burgeoning realizations of the inequity of his past decisions.

“WHILE I’D LOVE NOTHING MORE THAN TO ENDURE MORE OF OUR WITTY BANTER, I’M GOING TO BE LATE!” Hastily throwing his apron over the back of a chair, he glanced back over his shoulder in the doorway on his way out, “40 MINUTES!AND DON’T FORGET THE FOIL!!”

He watched the back of his brother disappear into the main hallway, impressed there wasn’t a single stain to be found on his pale green button up.He’d gotten very good about mindful dressing when it came to work.A lot had changed since they’d gotten here, this time.He’d been naive to consider those glasses the bulk of it.

Maybe things were all in his head.Was he projecting his reluctance to trust the future onto his brother?Papyrus was a very emotional monster, could he have been what pressured his magic into changing?Was his younger brother worried for his own sake?

  Papyrus often sarcastically lamented about his infuriatingly unwavering attitude since arriving here, encouraging him to seek out new interests.Was he holding his brother back?

The slam of the door snapped him back into his body.A million doubts and theories could’ve laced through his skull by the time his brother returned at this point.Getting hung up on something so entirely out of your control is a waste of time.Besides, he’d already decided to step back.

He needed to stop thinking about it.

Let it run its course.

Dragging out a deep breath, he pushed himself off his chair, ambling to the next room over and flicking on the tv.If there wasn’t a movie in the DVD player, their television was fixed to the station Papyrus had helped Mettaton procure.It had been a while, at least a few months, since the last time his brother had put it on of his own volition.

Slouching so deeply into the couch that he could barely see over his chest, he wrangled the previously discarded blanket back over his legs.

He had a night shift at Grillby’s nearly every day this upcoming week, and the hot dog stand he’d finally cave on and reopen.There had been a few openings to work at shops in a small shopping district not too far from their house he’d been eyeballing.Eyesocketing?

He’d do what he always did, and find something else to bide the time.It might even make Papyrus happy to see him doing more than “locking himself up” in the office.

Sometimes, faking it until you make it works surprisingly well.It worked to get the to the surface this time.It almost always worked on his brother.And he’d be lying if he didn’t find a muted satisfaction in making him proud.Even if it was just for a few minutes, before he noticed how messed up the house was.heh.

It was all he could do.The only thing you can control in life is yourself, right?

 

* * *

 

The hum of the engine stifled quickly as he twisted the keys from the ignition.The long walk ahead of him was dense with trees and plant life - scenery he was entirely unused to in such detail.

It would be tedious, redundant work to keep his focus on his destination.But the sour feeling still clawing up his spine from lying so boldly to his brother certainly helped motivate.

He hadn’t set any expectations for his return time, but he knew taking too long would get his brother worried after everything that had transpired in the past few weeks.So, he started running.

At first, it was for time’s sake, and somewhat to keep him from getting distracted, but as he fell in to the rhythmic flow of jogging, a subtle relief took hold.

He’d long since honed his natural ability to manipulate atomic density, making his trip that much easier.He and his brother referred to it as ‘clipping’, thanks to his brothers insistence that it was identical to malfunctions in his video games.

Passing through trees and roots obscuring his path with ease, he flew over the rough terrain with experienced speed.There was something akin to liberation in each step throwing him further, this was so very much unlike the pavements he’d grown used to.And letting his magic flow so freely as his spatial manipulation abilities tempted him into bounding impossibly high over otherwise long and winding slopes turned into the exact break from reality he’d needed.

While Sans encouraged discrepancy as opposed to using their talents so unabashedly, he couldn’t help but use them to accent his flamboyant behavior.When in appropriate company, that is.But lately, those opportunities had been few and far in between.The thought of training (actual, sparring training) with Undyne was sounding less ominous by the day. 

Expending his pent up energy and magic and stress hit him in a wave of euphoria as he sailed, no longer on the ground, pushing off as he ran through the air above the trees.The wind pushed back against him, then pulling him as it changed its mind.Back and forth.It felt real.They didn’t have feelings like this in the Underground.

It was cool and damp and his chest was taut when he realized he’d gone too high, nearly touching the clouds at this point.It felt like a game now, so instead of collecting himself, he fell.Plummeting back down to Earth, consumed by the wind now pushing against him with infinitely more pressure than he could get from running alone.

He found his balance as his eyes landed on the entrance to the mountain.He’d gone and gotten distracted in a way he hadn’t even considered.Suspending himself right there before Mt. Ebott, he refocused himself.

Making haste to the side the barrier had been broken on, he grounded both feet and mind, walking the rest of the way into the Underground.

It had been nearly three years now, since he’d last seen this place.The only home he’d known for so long.The only one he could remember.Had they always lived in Snowdin?He mused halfheartedly as he made his way through New Home.It had never been a particularly loud place, but the deathly silence that held it now was something else entirely.

The walk to Hotland was probably a third of the hike to the mountain, but it could’ve been twice as long in such a state.He hadn’t ever specifically noticed the ever present song of the core until it was absent.And in its absence lingered only gentle rock fall and the occasion air pocket escaping from the lava below.Much, much further below.

It looked so meek like this, without the core to sustain its livelihood.But nothing prevented that mysterious weight from pressing down on his shoulders as he traipsed through the many deactivated puzzles and transports.

He could’ve sworn there was something else he’d been meaning to do once he’d gotten this far, but the task eluded him.He ignored the buzz of a text from his pocket, keeping keen eyes on the halls ahead.He was taking too long.

With a sharp inhale, he pushed himself forward, through the walls and elevators, trusting his instincts and he maneuvered through the floors until he found an office.He’d reached the lab.

Uneasiness increasing tenfold, he stepped tenderly, as if there would be someone there to catch him.He found himself in what most referred to as “The True Lab”, a labyrinth of halls and offices.This was where the the amalgamates had been...trapped?Held?

The words sounded too harsh to describe the actions of his friend, but it was the truth.She’d kept them from their families, their homes...

  It was hard to admit, but the whole ordeal had reminded him of his own brother.It was hard to cope with the thought the “lazy” monster might not get up from one of his extended naps someday, after everything they’d been through.But he hadn’t Fallen yet, and surely others would have in his place.Which would have to be enough.

The disrepair of the long since abandoned labs filled him with a near unidentifiable sense of...grief?Anger?It was hard to fathom the repressed negativity struggling to build up inside his chest cavity.

While he’d only been here once, it reminded him of the tremendous failures lingering around their lives.Threads tying together every flaw, every question, every mistake...there were too many to count.Their color almost solid at this point.

Everything was tangled, blurry.

When had he stopped moving?

Motionless in a hallway void of anything besides one single door, to one single room, the apprehension welling up his throat and straining his shoulders was enough to push him to cry out.But he clenched his jaw and kept moving.

Chills and a lightheadedness made his head ache as he pulled the door open, dust cascading down around him.The pain shooting into his eye sockets was almost palpable, but something drew him deeper.It was so dark.

  Tucking his glasses into his phone pocket, blue light flickered to life as he let some of the pressure escape from his right eye, casting the bright hue over a completely ordinary looking office.

He blinked, the relief lasting seconds before a new discomfort set in.Magic flooded his skull, desperate to escape the only outlet.A fierce pain throbbed as he panicked, attempting vainly to smother the fire now consuming the eye.A gasping sob filled the room as he collapsed to his knees, overcome by agony.

Something heavy, and wet dropped onto the floor, onto his knees, staining whatever it touched blue.Excess magic surged angrily, spilling over entirely as he retched.

Tremors wracked his body as he fought to stay on his hands and knees as another wave struck.  Choking, gasping for air, fear overwhelmed him, unable to think in the face of a reaction so violent.

Once more his body purged itself before he lost the battle, collapsing onto his side.He laid, sprawled there for a moment, the only sound his labored breathing, when he realized the intensity was subsiding.

The faucet of magic in his eye had drained, leaving him exhausted to the point of passing out.Which he promptly denied, forcing his body to comply as he pushed back upwards.  He coughed into his hand, magic a deeper shade spattering his palm.  That had to be the last of it.  The rest of the phosphorescent magic now melted over the floor illuminated the entire room.It nearly looked like an off-tone cave in Waterfall. 

Taking in the mess, it seemed unrealistic he could’ve expelled so much concentrated magic and lived, let alone sit beside it feeling nothing besides supremely tired.Although, it was getting increasingly hard to concentrate on even a single thought.

It had been a mistake to attempt using such potent magic under so much stress, resulting in nothing but wasted time.

He let himself rest there for a few minutes more, the haze of his experience making it beyond difficult to reassess the situation.He’d have to try again another time.And not screw up so dreadfully.

His body gave surprisingly little resistance when he finally found his footing, besides shivering that refused to concede.

Moving at a more humble pace, he fished his phone from his pocket.He’d already been gone over three and a half hours.His mind was still too foggy to bother worrying, he’d think of an excuse on the drive back.

Only using his less magically inclined powers when absolutely necessary, the trek back took considerably longer.He’d managed to come up with a few valid answers to the most likely questions his brother would ask, but there was not a single one for why his clothes, his entire left side, were stained with his own magic.He’d have to cross that bridge when he came to it.

He was too tired to care.

But apparently, so was his brother.

After a spacey drive home, he soldiered into the house, ready to face Sans, only to find him asleep, peacefully sacked out on the couch.The house wasn’t even on fire this time, so he must’ve remembered the lasagna.

Groggily taking the opportunity to change his clothes, he discarded the ruined outfit deep within his closet to deal with on garbage night.Despite the heaviness settling into his limbs, he dragged himself to the bathroom, washing any remaining magic from his hands and face.  

  Dizzily fumbling back downstairs, he retrieved a glass of water.   He would make one appearance when his brother woke, and then pass out in his bedroom.He was so completely worn out, he couldn’t be bothered to think beyond that.

  Replacing his glasses, he sat in the dining room, fighting his eyelids as he flipped through the newspaper, locating the crossword.He reread the clues probably two hundred times without picking up a pencil before his brother finally stirred.

On his feet, he was in the doorway to living room, smiling as the older skeleton rolled over and stared directly at him.

“oh, hey, bro.”

“GOOD EVENING, BROTHER!HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN SLEEPING?”

Pushing himself upright, the other monster flashed him a familiar broad grin before answering.

“uh...well, i did the noodle thing.”

“YOU WENT IMMEDIATELY BACK TO SLEEP AFTERWARDS, DIDN’T YOU?”It was so easy just to come back to this.

A playful shrug was the answer he got. 

“SANS!!”

He stomped his foot, called him lazy.Asked more sincerely if he planned on doing more besides sleep this week.He even pulled out the googly eyes after a particularly awful pun.

It was so easy just to pretend nothing happened.It was so easy to slide right back into place.Just like after the resets.It was so much easier this way.

“VERY WELL, THEN!TOMORROW I WILL ASSIST YOU IN MOVING YOUR CART TO THE PARK, BUT IT’S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO ORDER THE SUPPLIES!!I _RELISH_ THE THOUGHT OF YOU TAKING SUCH INITIATIVE!”

“just tryin’ to _ketchup_ to you, bro.”

“NYEH HEH HEH!!BUT OF COURSE!GOODNIGHT, SANS!”

Clicking his skull against his brother’s, a sharp pain shot throughhis head and down his neck.Not that he’d have noticed, as the younger skeleton cheerfully hustled back upstairs to get ready for bed.

He purposefully pushed the electric pain to the back of his mind as it ebbed, brushing his teeth, washing his face again, staring at the practiced smile reflected back to him.It melted into a more sincere one as he took a deep breath.

Despite everything, he was happy.The fear and the anxieties rattling around his skull were outweighed by the feeling of success.He’d made one day feel normal.He could make everything feel normal again.No matter what happened to him.He could fix it.

He could fix everything.

His body was on the verge of collapse by the time he made it back to his room.He was already unconscious by the time his head hit the pillows.And for the first time in weeks, he slept, undisturbed, for a solid three hours.

When he woke, nothing had changed.  The quiet shuffling from downstairs assured him his brother was still up, but he could tell he wasn’t in his office.

Things would be normal again soon, he could feel it.He let his eyelids shut again, embracing the calm of night as he let himself rest further.Awake, but without thought.Without worry.

It was going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you drown in the rain?  
> Don’t look up.  
> Don’t look up.


	16. Here Comes A Thought

  A heavy knock woke him.His eyes fighting to remain shut, the rest of him had already started shifting into motion.His feet found the floor first, taking a minute to locate his slippers as he adjusted his hoodie.With one good rub, his eyes conceded as he pulled himself upwards and onto his feet. 

Getting one good stretch out before he ambled over to the door, he swung it open casually to greet their visitor.

“Howdy, Sans!” The furrow of the boss monster’s brows betrayed the sunshine in his tone, matched by a _goatish_ grin .

“hey there, your royal dadness.”Leaning against the door frame, the skeleton raised his brow bones, “what can i do for ya?”

“Ah!Yes...” wringing his hands, he averted his gaze until he thought of an answer, “Is your brother home?”

“yep,” meandering back into the hall, Asgore ducked in behind him, “hey, pap-!“

“No!No- please, that’s alright!I...actually came to talk to y-“

A calamity of sounds interrupted the ex-king as the younger skeleton bounded down the stairs.

“YES, BROTHER?”His eyes widened at their guest, “OH!HELLO, MR. ASGORE!!!”

His attention was drawn back to old monster as his shoulders tensed at the appearance of the younger monster.

“Hello, Papyrus...it is good to see you again.”His eyes flicked between them.

“OF COURSE IT IS!NYEH HEH HEH!!”

The boss monster choked out a laugh in response.

“so, what can _we_ do  for ya?”The paws wringing each other weren’t an uncommon sight on him, but he didn’t usually act like this around them.‘Specially not since he’d started working with Papyrus.

“Oh, right...yes, um,” he calmed himself, smiling softly at the shorter skeleton, “would you mind...coming back to my house for some tea, Sans?”

Receiving a confused look from his brother, he shrugged.

“guess not.”An awkward silence was quick to fill the room.

“oh, you meant now.”

Asgore’s smile strained further up as he closed his eyes to avoid looking at anything, “Only if you’re not busy.”

“heh, didn’t know you were a comic, too.”Shoving his brother playfully, he shuffled towards the door, “no party’s while i’m out.”

The taller skeleton didn’t get the chance to respond before Asgore offered a well-wishing nod and hurried out the door as well.

The monarch had grown quite used to his brother’s antics since they started working together, but even before then, he’d never acted so baaashful around him.And he wasn’t the most, uh, adept monster out there...this couldn’t be good.

“it’s a nice day out, huh?”

The other monster was still distracted by his nerves, laughing anxiously as he tapped his fingers together.

“Y-yes!Of course.I should probably...stop by Tori’s to water the plants...later...”His voice tapered as he spoke more to himself than his company.

“mhmm.would be a good day for that.”

The rest of the trip was silent, but steadily calming.As they drew nearer to their destination, he could sense the other’s demeanor shift.He was probably deciding what to say, or ask.It was painfully obvious that whatever it was had something to do with his brother.Of course.Why wouldn’t it?

The neat little house pulling into view was as pristine as ever, flourishing plant life abound.Asgore lived on the edge of a small wooded area, at the beginning of their “settlement”.It was secluded enough that he could let nature have its way with his home without it affecting neighboring houses.A little plain, maybe, but it held a sort of nostalgia about it.

He’d only ever been here once or twice before with Frisk, and only inside once.There was no need for a Judge on the surface, so there wasn’t much of a need to see the monster outside of exchanging niceties at parties and school functions.

Asgore also happened to be the only other monster he knew was aware of the timelines.Of course, they never really acknowledged it.An unspoken rule, almost.But there was some security to be found in knowing he was not the only one.

Aside from suspecting his brother of feigning ignorance.But that‘s neither here nor there.

The large monster’s horns nicked the doorway as they entered.Taking almost no notice, he offered his guest a seat as he shuffled to the kitchen to start the water for tea.Presumably his favorite; golden flower.Never had much of a stomach for it, himself. 

But he waited patiently.Focusing on everything but his thoughts.Holding speculation at bay, he kept his mind idle.It probably wasn’t as bad as his mind wanted him to believe it was.Maybe he just caught Papyrus levitating or something.

Settling down once the beverages were prepared, hints of uncertainty still shone in the ex-King’s behavior.Toying with the disproportionately small cup as he took a deep breath, Asgore watched the window as he started to speak.

“There is very little I know of your past, my friend.Very little I know of your brother’s...” his voice was calm, the worry in his eyes sharpening into something different.

“And I understand you do not speak of it often.”It was a unique talent to look so kind and so serious at the same time, the eyes turned on him piercing, “But I would like to ask you a few questions.”

He took a moment, letting a thin trail of steam warm his face before returning his focus to his host.

“this have somethin’ to do with that business trip?”

Asgore’s gaze did not waver, “Only somewhat.”

The tension in the air was almost palpable.Weighing his options carefully, the skeleton blinked his attention down to the cup in his hand.

“if you’re worried about my brother, i can add your name to the list.me ‘n alphys started a petition to get him-“

“Sans.”

“-into therapy...”

An uneasy quiet settled in.Minutes passed before the boss monster’s eyes softened as his brows knitted together.

“I have never seen your brother so belligerent.Nor distracted.He barely spoke throughout the entire trip...” breaking his stare, he watched his tea for a moment.

He could feel his hands clenching tighter inside his mittens with each admission.

“He spoke in a language unlike any other I’ve heard before.Then did not remember doing so.”

His sockets went empty.

“I fear something is...”

“wrong?yeah.like i said,” lights flicking back on, they trained on the monster across from him, smile tightening, “join the club.”

  No.  He’d push down his reactions for now.Mull everything over later.Right now, he needed to find out exactly what had happened.

Running his free hand over his beard, the large monster set his cup back onto its saucer, frowning further. 

This was going about as badly as he could’ve imagined.

“Then it is as I suspected.These are not...semi-regular occurrences for him?”

A loaded question.No matter what he answered, it would have consequences.

“he hasn’t been sleeping too well lately, so al’s helpin’ him out with it.”Any sign of strain vanished from his voice as he shrugged, shifting to cross his ankles, “he’ll be back to his regularly scheduled program soon.s’nothin’ to worry about.”

Skeptical eyes watched him from across the table, only breaking when the other took his first sip from his drink.When he looked back towards the window, there was something sad in his eyes.Guilt...?

“That is good.I am glad he has you, Sans.And you, him.But...” his eyes shut, like he wasn’t ready to finish his sentence, forcing it out regardless.

“For the time being, I do not think Frisk should spend time with you two, or at your home.”

Like a fist to the chest, he struggled not to show how hard those words hit.

“I’m sorry.I know how close the three of you are.Perhaps after they return to school, things will be...settled.”

The kid had been the only thing holding his brother together a few days ago.But that didn’t exactly make a good counter argument.This was the exact opposite of what Papyrus needed.He needed normalcy.He needed reminded of how important he is.But this?

“you talk to tori about this?”His nonchalance slipped for a moment as he leaned forward.

“No.I do not want to worry her.”He’d clearly expected the question, but couldn’t hide his discomfort as he answered, “I know how much she cares for you two, as well, and I do not wish for her to see him like this, either.”

See him like what exactly?Sure, he was acting a little more stressed than usual, but why was Asgore treating this like a crisis?He didn’t have anything close to the whole picture....There had to be something he wasn’t telling him.

“all because he said something weird?never bothered anyone before.”Smiling in a teasing way, he held his ground.Arguing probably wouldn’t get him anywhere with the Frisk thing, but he could at least suss out what was upsetting the boss monster so much.

“You know your brother better than I do, Sans, these changes should seem more drastic to you than anyone.Unless you feel like sharing why they don’t.”The sarcasm in his tone was shockingly biting.This had changed from a conversation to a standoff.

Setting the small cup on the table, he shifted to face the other head on.Coyly calm, he folded his hands together.

“sorry to be so frank with you, your majesty, but i really feel like you’re the last person to _judge_ who frisk spends time with.”

The mild scowl on the goat monster’s face dissipated into surprise, but he didn’t get the chance to respond.

“i get that your whole thing is taking care of people.but my only thing is taking care of my brother.so i’m gunna need you to have a little more faith in my judgement.”Rising to his feet, he started toward the door, “or at least in his.”

The boss monster was quick to follow, torn between frustration and disappointment.

“This was not meant as provocation, Sans, you know as well as I the dangers of blind faith.”His tone wavered just enough to reassure that he knew this had tumbled out of his control.

But as much as he resented it.Asgore was right.

Stopping on the small front porch of the secluded house, he allowed himself to look back at the tall monster, smile steady with his regained composure.

“i’ll tell you what.we can split the difference;” closing his right eye as he shrugged, “i’ll make sure the kid isn’t around if he starts actin’ up.and i’ll even chaperone.”

Both eyes closed for a moment, he didn’t wait for an agreement.The ball was already in his court.Strolling down the steps, he made his way toward the trees along the far side of the yard, “s’not like they don’t try ‘n drag me everywhere anyway.”

He could feel the tense stare fixed on him, but no argument followed.Eventually out of eye shot, he took a short cut to the other side of the neighborhood, sighing heavily as he flopped back against the side of whatever building he had ended up by.

The trip was a week ago.Before...the ‘incident’.Whatever had upset the monarch had built to that, not the other way around.So it technically fell under the category of ‘addressed’, right? 

Nothing had happened since.As a matter of fact, things had smoothed out considerably.Granted, it had only been six days.But...progress is progress.Papyrus had even been going to bed at a normal time, even though they both knew he wasn’t sleeping.He didn’t seem afraid to try again, anyway.

It was almost a mantra at this point; ‘don’t intervene unless necessary’.Same as always...

He didn’t used to have to remind himself.Maybe his brother was rubbing off on him after all.

Leaning back onto his feet, he stepped away from the wall as he pulled his phone from his pocket.He’d shoot Papyrus a text about getting food or something and then go home to get ready for his shift.Grillby was pretty cool about him being late, but he was-

Fingers tightening around the device in hand, a memory flashed back to him.Papyrus’ phone had been destroyed.The day he came back from his trip, it had been smashed against the wall in the basement.And yet, he’d seen the skeleton using it several times throughout the week...had he taken it to Alphys?

Typing something out, he sent it before he could overthink things.There’s nothing suspicious about fixing your phone.But that certainly didn’t stop it from setting alarms off in his psyche.He’d think about that later, too.

Asgore has gotten in his head.He was on edge.Maybe staying after his shift tonight would do him some good.He hadn’t been frequenting Grillby’s as much since he started working there, and if he expected things to get back to normal, he was gunna have to start pitching in.

Papyrus was quick to reply, as always, in his usually caps lock fashion.Chipper in attitude, and with lots of emoticons.A few puns back and forth.A scolding for a particularly bad one.

It felt comfortable like this.

Starting back toward their house, he nearly forgot to pick something up, only remembering when he noticed a new text from his brother about him getting something healthier than he usually does.

Things were already starting to seem better.Asgore was just going to have to be patient.

And he was going to have to work on ignoring those tiny thorns of guilt that wound between his fingers and up his throat.After all the resets, all the failed attempts to right his wrongs, it had been quite a long time since he’d felt them like this.

Maybe he shouldn’t think about it later.Maybe he shouldn’t think about it at all.Wouldn’t be the first time Papyrus had literally spoken gibberish.And everyone has bad moods.If whatever had been giving him such bad nightmares lately had caused it, it clearly wasn’t a problem now.But avoiding Frisk for months definitely wouldn’t help.

Maybe he’d talk to Tori about it.Or maybe he should just pretend that little chat never happened.Watch and wait.

If he needed to intervene, he would.Probably.Maybe.

 

Maybe not.

 

* * *

 

Water landed against his back in a rhythmic patter.He focused on the sound, on the feeling, as it washed away the clusters of thoughts tangling his head.

Like a chorus of muffled heartbeats, he found himself entranced by the noise, releasing him into a clear mind.His own soul pulse joined in, married by the soft hiss of the shower reverberating through the small bathroom.

A loud silence could do wonders on the psyche.

The water was too hot, but he didn’t care.The steam felt good building on any bones the spray couldn’t reach.He could’ve stayed like that for hours.Maybe even days.Were it not for his prying consciousness already clawing it’s way back into focus.

Calls to make, appointments to set, ideas filling his skull to the brim, ready to spill over; he really couldn’t just stand in the shower all day, now could he. 

Leisurely rinsing himself off, the room felt significantly cooler after the welcoming heat of the steam as he stepped out.His thoughts already threatening to overwhelm him, the towel in hand was distant.All sense of feeling was gone by the time he moved out into the hallway, then to his room.

Impatience getting the better of him, he’d already retrieved a notebook by the time his mind caught up.A few drops smudged the paper, but it did not deter his hand from hastily scribbling down the last few hypotheses that piqued his interest before they were drowned out by the others.He’d have to expand upon them later.

The past few trips to the labs had proven to be considerably more useful than the first.And while he hadn’t found too much yet, the mysterious office he’d taken up part time residency in had more than enough to keep him busy.

An entire filing cabinet and several drawers worth of busy, actually.

Much of the research was about monster souls, conveniently, and the sustainability of their bodies.Things he’d never really thought about or considered (and he’d done quite a lot of that over the years), and there were even some files about human souls!But those were highly damaged and very delicate.And not overly relevant to the problem at hand.Problem s ...

The biggest one being that he still wasn’t exactly sure what those problems were.The nightmares had seemingly returned to their normal intensity, which was incredibly manageable by comparison.And his magic...

The first sparring match had gone well.Undyne mentioned he looked nervous.But he maintained a steady level of force, matching hers fairly well, and kept his cool the entire time.He’d even enjoyed it a bit, by the end!He was lucky to have a friend like her.

He was lucky to have friends at all.And he’d work very hard to deserve them.

And burning off some of his magic definitely helped to take the edge off.It no longer felt like it was cleaving its way from the inside out.At the moment, anyway.All things considered, it had probably gone as well as it could have!And it seemed like she had fun, too...

He missed her already.

Almost as if on cue, a distant buzz snatched his attention.He’d still been writing?Opting to look over it later, he was back on his feet in a jiffy, retrieving his phone to find it had actually been his brother that had texted him.He’d nearly forgotten about the older monster’s misadventure he’d embarked on earlier with the king!

The message was short, much like the sender himself, something about walking home and stopping for food.He responded in as usual a way as possible, not that he really had to think about it.The natural tide of life had been drawing them back in lately.It felt very good to be back at it.

All he’d really needed was a good jump-start!Something to remind him of how important it was to take care of things!!He’d prefer that thing not be losing control of his magic with his brother nearby, but it worked, nonetheless!

Speaking of taking care of things!He had an appointment to get ready for!A real one, too!He’d get dressed in his Sunday best, make some coffee, then hit the pavement!!Lest he be late for being an hour early!

Tidying and drying and getting dressed was a menial task.So much so, he found himself being pulled back into his head.Even with an important mission at hand, he could feel his thoughts roping him back toward the Underground...

All that those files on monster souls sure were enlightening!It was strange to think of their bodies as constructs of their essence rather than, well, bodies.He’d known that already, as any monster did, but it was funny seeing it written out as though a monsters’ soul was an entity separate from its “exoskeleton” (a particularly fitting term in his case).

A pressuring sting spread across the tips of his fingers, breaking his concentration.He was clutching a coffee pot by the side rather than the handle.He was burning...his hand was burning!

Gasping his realization, he slid it back toward the small device that housed it.Catching a glimpse of his pants, he realized he put on the pale pink suit, one of his favorites!A good outfit for a Sunday...meeting......

Humans didn’t usually have meetings on Sunday, so it must be important.

The click of a door kept his head tethered to reality this time, his brother soon following, appearing in the entryway of the kitchen.

“sup?”

“I MADE A POT OF COFFEE, WOULD YOU LIKE SOME?TO GO WITH YOUR...” peaking at the nondescript brown package in his brother’s hands, he cocked his brow bone, “DINNER?”

“it’s, uh, ‘falafel’.you ever heard of that?”

“NO, BUT IT‘S GOT ‘AWFUL’ RIGHT IN THE TITLE.”Shooting his brother a teasing smile, he turned back to the counter to pick a mug from the cupboard.

“maybe that just means it’s ‘awfully’ good.”Coming up beside him, the shorter skeleton rested the bag on the counter, “i got some extra anyway, ‘case you wanted to try ‘em.”

“I APPRECIATE THE CONSIDERATION, BUT I WAS ACTUALLY JUST ABOUT TO LEAVE!”He downed the drink as quickly as he had poured it, “I HAVE ANOTHER APPOINTMENT - THIS TIME WITH THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY!”

The older monster looked at him with his usual grin, but his eyes widened at his brother’s disregard for proper drink etiquette, “another meeting already?”Then almost more to himself, “and, uh, you know that’s not espresso, right?”

“YES!YOU KNOW HOW BUSY THE SUMMERTIME IS!!ALL THE MAJOR CONSTRUCTION AND ESTABLISHMENTS MUST BE ESTABLISHED AND CONSTRUCTED BEFORE IT GETS COLD AGAIN!!”

His brother’s smile softened as he watched him move to the sink, cleaning out the briefly used vessel.

“yeah, makes sense.just, uh,” he nodded to the hand with singed finger tips, “make sure ya don’t  _burn_ yourself out, bro.”

“NYEH?” Setting the spotless mug back in the cupboard, he examined his hand.They were...worse than he’d realized, “RIGHT!COFFEE POTS ARE SURPRISINGLY CONDUCTIVE!”

An evanescent flourish of blue healing magic bleached the marks in a soulbeat.Waving the hand victoriously at his brother, the slightest hint of a furrowed brow bone confused him.Until it didn’t.

Jolting at his sudden realization, he quickly pulled as much of his sleeves as possible over his hands.

“WHOOPSIE-DAISY!!!I...JUST GOT OUT OF THE SHOWER!!I COMPLETELY FORGOT!!NYEH HEH-“ zipping toward the stairs, he called a hasty ‘BE RIGHT BACK’ over his shoulder.

How could he have forgotten?He’d never forgotten.Not for...not for years!He usually even bathed with them on!He had several pairs, never had to worry about not having any to wear.So how?!

The red leather gloves, his current favorites, were sitting neatly on his dresser.He slid them on deftly, wringing his hands together like it would somehow prevent him from making the same mistake again any time in the near future.

He practically stumbled down the stairs in his race back to the kitchen.Sans was exactly where he’d been, which made sense considering he’d only been gone for 64 seconds.

“RIGHT AS RAIN!!”Sliding a gloved hand over his brother’s shoulder as he pulled up beside him, he promptly turned the older monster toward him.

“NOW!I SHALL RETURN BEFORE THE STRIKE OF DUSK!WE ALSO NEED MORE LAUNDRY DETERGENT, SO IF THERE’S ANYTHING ELSE WE NEED, DON’T HESITATE TO MESSAGE ME!”Without waiting for a confirmation, he released the skeleton and headed more moderately toward the front door.

“hey, pap-“

His brother’s voice stopped him in the entryway, the sound of steps turning him to see the monster standing stiffly on the other side of the hall.

“i have a shift in a few.”His lazy smiled contradicted his posture.

“OH.THEN I SHALL SEE YOU LATER THAN ANTICIPATED!BUT LATER, _BONE_ THELESS!”Sticking his pointer finger high in accentuation, his smile brightened as his hands found his hips, “I REALLY AM HAPPY TO SEE YOU FINALLY MOTIVATING YOURSELF MORE, BROTHER!”

Leaning against the wall beside him, Sans’ unfocused eyes watched him collect his wallet and keys, “thanks, bro, workin’ hard to do it in _spine_ of myself.”

“WOWIE!YOU REALLY _PUT YOUR BACK_ INTO THAT ONE!”

“work hard, play hard, right?”

“I’M SURE FALLING ASLEEP ON A TABLE AT GRILLBY’S IS MUCH HARDER WORK THAN FALLING ASLEEP ON OURS!”

“sure hope it won’t be, _knock on wood_.”

“THE JOB DOESN’T MAKE YOU THAT _BOARD_ , DOES IT?”

“nah, ‘sides, it’s only _temporal_ -y til i figure a better use of my time and lack of energy.”

“MAYBE SOMETHING LOW _STAPES_ IS BETTER FOR THE TIME BEING.”

“you’re really workin’ me to the funny bone today, huh?”

Feigning exhaustion, his brother couldn’t hide the wider-than-usual smile spread across his face.

“WE CAN CONSIDER IT YOUR EXERCISE FOR THE DAY!SOME OF YOURS WERE ALMOST EVEN _HUMERUS_ , TODAY!”

“keep grillin’ me like this, i’m gunna have to tell grillby you’re after his title.”

“HARDLY!I DIDN’T USE NEARLY ENOUGH GREASE!!”Spinning on his heal, he finally opened the door, “BUT NOW I’M ONLY GOING TO BE 30 MINUTES EARLY!I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY!”

“can’t you tell?i’m beaming.”

Throwing a sarcastic glare over his shoulder, he continued out onto the porch, waving a goodbye as he shut the door before hustling to the garage. 

Concentrating to the best of his abilities, he could see that the appointment wouldn’t take long.If he really pressed, he might even be able to squeeze in a trip to the labs today, one he hadn’t planned.

Maybe things were really starting to go back to the way they were.Maybe this time it would stick.

Maybe this time he wouldn’t mess up..... _again_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe I'll find myself smiling on that distant shore...  
> Maybe I'm not...alone...


	17. It Always Comes Back

Cold silence was shattered by the high pitch wail of a machine.It groaned it’s compliance, starting regardless of its years of abandonment.It was not visible, but the sound grew in volume.Life began to breathe into the darkness.

Hands, smothering.Some soft, caressing, others harsh and desperate.Clawing, pulling, scratching.He could feel it all, but the darkness denied him sight.

The hands multiplied again, three grappling his face.Thin, strong fingers pried his jaw open, others infiltrating his skull through his eye sockets.More still lacing between his ribs, around his hips.They were everywhere.He’d lost count.

It was not painful, despite the chinks some of the fingers dug out of his bones.The smell of dust tickled his senses.His jaw still forcibly agape, what little consciousness he had left pleaded for him to cry out.

Why?

But he complied.No sound could escape him before liquid flooded his mouth.It was filling his chest.He was drowning.The hands became manic.Pulling, grasping, cracking and dislocating bones in their wake.

The smell of dust was pungent in the air.

But it did not hurt.

 

 

It was cool. 

Damp. 

His eyes instinctively fluttered open, blinded for a soulbeat by the light of day washing over him.It filtered through the sheer curtains of their living room.He was in the living room.

He tilted his head sideways, admiring the soft sunlight of a cloudy day.His chest was to the floor, he must have fallen asleep the moment he’d gotten home that morning.He hadn’t been tired before, but conversely couldn’t remember the last time he’d rested.

Letting the tranquility of the room usurp the unsettled lingerings of his dream, he let himself lie there for a moment more.It was only when he moved to get up that he realized the floor he was not the familiar hardwood, nor rug of their home.As a matter of fact, it wasn’t a floor at all.

Pushing himself up, (or rather, down?) he found a ceiling fan on his other side.Rubbing an eye socket with the back of one hand, he yawned.As much as he knew it usually amused his brother any time he awoke in a strange place, he’d rather not be seen sleeping on the ceiling right now.

Correcting himself gracefully, he found his phone on the floor.The actual floor.It must have fallen out of his pocket...tapping the screen on, his suspicion was confirmed - he’d only been sleeping for somewhere around 40 minutes.There was practically no chance his brother had seen him, seeing as he was still as very much asleep as he‘d been upon his younger brother’s return.

Where he was, though, was another matter entirely.The couch was vacant, which usually meant he’d fallen asleep in the office, but upon further investigation, was...not the case.

Forgoing his search, he decided there wasn’t really anything to wake him over.And he could tell the other skeleton was somewhere in the house, so it wasn’t a concern.

Wandering back into the hallway by the stairs, he stretched his arms above his head.A nice jog would be good.Morning jogs were always good.He had sparring at four, which gave him 7 hours.Enough time for a short jog, breakfast, a shower...paperwork

.....the dishes........

or..........

He did  technically have enough time to stop back at the lab.If he ran both ways to and from, he’d have at least an hour...

He hadn’t taken a day trip in just under a week (5 days), so it probably wouldn’t appear suspicious. 

Of course...that rather defeated the purpose of him returning home in the first place.All he’d managed to get done was pass out on the ceiling for an hour.There was still laundry to do, permits to proofread, garbage to be taken out; life didn’t stop just because he didn’t have to make an appearance!

It was hard to deny the desire to return so soon.His skull was still buzzing from the box of files he’d found the night before.Blueprints for a machine he’d never seen, accompanied by rundowns of its function, of test run results (several failed, a few successful, as far as he could tell).It was surprisingly interesting!

From what he could piece together, the machine had been an antecedent to the core.Something to do with thermal energy?And about organic material and magic?He didn’t quite understand what most of it meant.Yet.But for whatever reason, it had engrossed him.

Though it most certainly couldn’t help him in his quest to find “inner peace”, there was nothing wrong with a healthy amount of curiosity!And besides...he’d reached a bit of a dead end on his other lead.

He’d scoured the filing cabinet, desk, and closet multiple times, but there were too many missing pieces of the research on monster souls.And nothing he’d found at the library had filled any of the holes.As a matter of fact, nothing even came close.

How could they live knowing so little of the reality behind their very life source?It was beguiling!And he’d been the same! Unbothered by such an extreme lack of understanding.But isn’t that true of all things until you learn about them?

Stepping back with a pleased huff, his hands rested neatly over his hip bones as he marveled at the pristinely folded fabrics.

Oh!He was in his bedroom!His bed had practically disappeared under the mountain of clean laundry.Most of it had been taken care of, but a few stray towels were still heaped by the headboard.Blue magic enveloped them, the towels appearing to fold themselves while his attention fell on the notebook resting atop the dresser.

Summoning it distractedly, he was quick to start jotting down notes from his earlier escapade.The majority of the pages were already littered with half sentences and whatever algorithms he could remember.It would already be the second journal he’d filled with writings from the labs.

With as many distractions as he’d had lately, he hadn’t even touched his puzzle contraption scheming notebook since before his trip.How long ago had that been?It didn’t really matter.This was actually productive!!Learning should always be encouraged!And maybe he could apply whatever he was learning into making devices that could actually benefit people!Instead of just pointless puzzles and traps.

Of course, he wasn’t an inventor, and far from as technologically skilled as his brother.But what experience he did have provided him with just enough knowledge to get started.Maybe he could even ask-!

No.

If Sans knew he was going back to the labs Underground, he’d think something was wrong.He’s not supposed to know about science things.Or know that his brother knows about science things.

Tapping the pen to his jaw, he looked up at the ceiling.The minuscule bumps and crags in the plaster were barely visible, were it not for the flecks of shadow exaggerating them, he might not even be able to see them, regardless of his glasses.But he appreciated them nonetheless.

The ceilings in this house were taller than the Snowdin ones.And they weren’t as smooth.Actually, maybe those ones weren’t smooth either.He wouldn’t have seen it before.

Laying backwards onto his mattress, a sigh escaped him.The blankets felt softer after a good wash.Pressing his head back against them, a smile toyed at the corners of his mouth as he closed his eyes.

The birds outside chirped excitedly as the sun shone through a break in the clouds.The wind chimes on their neighbors porch sang in harmony with them.They were distant, but closer than they’d ever been before.The air filling the space behind his ribs felt strong, taking it in until his chest was as taut as it could be.Then letting it push itself back out from behind his teeth.

The house settled with the birds.A breeze tickled the branches of the tree outside his window.In the darkness of his clear mind, a dim white light, fringed with blue, glowed faintly in his periphery.It pulsed gently, soothed by a mind at ease.A mind asleep, rather.His brother was in his bedroom, for a change.Sleeping peacefully on his mattress.

But the soul itself seemed so small and frail.He almost wanted to reach out.Hold it.Heal it.But souls didn’t work like that.Not monsters’ souls, anyway.

Sinking back into the confines of his own skull, his eyes startled open at the sound of something clattering to the floor.

Glancing over the edge of his mattress, he was surprised to find only the pen from his notebook.The sound had possessed much more volume than a simple pen should summon, but nothing else seemed out of place...

Nothing was out of place...!

The laundry was-

Shooting back up into a sitting position, the aforementioned items looked back at him from atop his dresser, stacked concisely into three towers.His clothes, however, appeared to be missing.Confusion dulled his movements as he rescued the pen from the floor, tucking it back in the coils along the pages as he rose to his feet.

Had he put the laundry away?

He hadn’t fallen asleep again, had he?

An odd popping sound snapped him back to reality, his notebook crying out to not be clenched in such a way.That was no good at all - his speedy handwriting was hard enough to read as it was, let alone crumpled or torn.

Taking a deep breath, he blinked the nerves away.Why would he be nervous?All he did was...forget...

Forget.....

 

Forget...?

 

Forget what?

His foot tapped a steady rhythm as he fluttered his notebook back open.Flipping pages, the ink blurred together until a familiar word caught his attention.He scribbled out another addition to his ever growing list of frustrations and shut the book tight.

He’d worry about it later.Right now, he wanted to focus on housework.Or as much as his ceaseless wonderings would let him.He’d have to expand his lab search to other offices.But that could wait until his next trip.

It could wait.

He could wait.

 

 

 

“KEEP YOUR EYES ON ME!!”

Magic sailed past him, centimeters from his jaw.Brilliant light emanated from the ground underfoot, giving him seconds of warning to throw himself aside before spears jutted forth, only just catching the tread of his shoe.

His feet were back under him in an instant, dancing out of the way of another string of airborne attacks.He’d love to take her advice, but she wasn’t exactly giving him the opportunity.

“NICE!But try dodging THIS!!!”

The spears he’d narrowly avoided angled themselves behind him, turning back faster than before.

Spinning on his heal, he leapt backwards into a handspring, attacks missing him by a wider margin this time.Focusing on sound above sight, he located his opponent three yards southeast of him, sending two rows of attacks as he landed. 

She’d dodge, but he’d catch her after her rebound.She’d swing at him, then send two more attacks.Tracing and ground.He’d turn her blue from behind and catch her with an uppercut.

Playing out exactly as predicted, she was at his side again before he found his footing, blocking with both attacks in hand.Jumping aside, she sent out her attacks, the ground attack angled to throw him off, but he saw it coming, commanding his blue attack before he’d even finished avoiding hers.

She gasped as she stumbled forward, perfectly aligning herself for his finishing blow.The attack flew from the ground, knocking her backwards through the air, with more force than intended.

Landing hard, his friend laid sprawled out in the grass, huffing.Okay, a lot more force than intended.Hurrying over, she was already pushing herself back to her feet at his approach.

“Now THAT’S...” she clasped his shoulder as she caught her breath, “...what I’m talking about...!”Her beaming smile contrasted the knot in throat while he did his best to reciprocate.

“How’re you feeling?”Her eyes glistened.He could tell she was expecting an encouraging answer.

“SWEATY!”

“HAH!Seriously, Pap!!Gimme the status report!!!”Shifting her hands to her hips, she straightened up attentively.

“I’M DEFINITELY TIRED!BUT MY MAGIC’S BEEN PRETTY NORMAL SINCE WE STARTED SPARRING AGAIN!IT WAS PROBABLY JUST THE NIGHTMARES!!”

She scoffed, amused in spite of herself, “Well, I’m glad I could help!!”Starting back toward the house, she kept her focus on him as her smile sharpened, “I could probably help more if you’d actually use your full force, but I guess SOME monsters just don’t think it’s NECESSARY to play their A game.”

Rolling his eye sockets, he met her frustration with a teasing grin, “YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE GETTING MY METAPHORICAL BUTT KICKED!!WHY WOULD I CHANGE THAT?”

Reaching back she shook his shoulder, “COME ON, PAPYRUS!!How cool would it be to fight two on two????My green and blue, your blue and orange!We could REALLY go at it!!!”Excitement getting the better of her, she stopped in front of him, putting her fists up, landing fake blows across his torso.

He chuckled as he lamely blocked a few, “I CAN’T HELP IT!I TRIED FORCING IT, BUT IT DIDN’T WORK!I HAVE NO IDEA HOW IT HAPPENED THE FIRST TIME!!”

Letting up, his friend rolled her visible eye as she crossed her arms, “Then we’ll just have to keep practicing until you can kick my ass in a fair fight!”

“OH, MY MISTAKE!I THOUGHT THESE LESSONS WERE FOR ANGER MANAGEMENT!!”

“NGAH!”In one swift motion, she pulled his head under her arm, relentlessly running her fist against his skull.

He squirmed, pleading for her to stop even though he was rather fond of the attack by now.With a shove for good measure, she released him as they soldiered back to the front of the house.

Undyne listed off a few plans for the upcoming week, reaffirming their schedule, asking of his plans.He replied, but for the life of him, couldn’t recall what he said.She joked about something and he shot back with something sillier.

They stood at the front porch for a little while, chatting, but he didn’t want to miss the end of his brother’s shift, so he started his goodbye, when-

“Actually...Pap,” she rubbed the back of her neck, uncertainty written all over her, “how often _do_ you  have nightmares?”

He stared for a moment, taken off guard by the question.It couldn’t be that unusual to have frequent nightmares, could it?With as many as his brother had, he’d always considered it normal, so why did the answer sit so heavy at the bottom of his stomach?

“A NORMAL AMOUNT!”Rolling his hand dismissively, his smile widened, “BUT LIKE I SAID!!!THEY’RE NOT THAT BAD RIGHT NOW!”

Her gaze was curious, not doubtful.Perhaps cautious.

“Is that why you don’t sleep?”A perceptive question, but misguided all the same.

“NO, SIREE!I’VE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS!”

“Haven’t you always had nightmares?”Beyond exasperation, there was something surprisingly dark in her eye.A shadow of something from her own past, maybe.A perceptive, unfortunately accurate question.

“I...” resting a hand under his jaw, he tapped his thumb thoughtfully, “I DON’T REMEMBER.BUT I DON’T THINK SO!”It felt considerably more likely that he had.

This time, her gaze was unsure.She believed him, but not his words.Her focus shifted to the other side of the street.After that answer, whatever questions she had in her head, she knew he probably wouldn’t answer honestly.It felt bad that she didn’t trust him.But...he knew he wasn’t really giving her a reason to.

“THEY WERE WORSE BEFORE WE MET FRISK.”She was surprised by the statement for a second, but it quickly melted into a smile.

“Yeah.That little weirdo just kinda made everything better, huh?”He could hear the affection in her tone, it brought on a sympathetic warmth.

“Ya know, you did, too!”

It was his turn to look surprised, but he recovered even faster, “OF COURSE!I STRIVE TO BE-“

“I mean it, nerd.I don’t know what I’d do without’cha.”She looked at him with something new in her gaze.Was it pride?She was...proud of him....?

A rush of emotion pushed him forward, embracing her in a tight hug that she returned with slightly more force than necessary (payback for earlier, probably).And when they pulled apart the hand on his shoulder didn’t feel as far away as usual.

“YOU’D BE LOST WITHOUT ME.BUT I’D BE LOST WITHOUT YOU!SO THAT MAKES US EVEN!!”

Her laugh was loud and brash, and probably alarmed the neighbors, but it never failed to make him feel better.

“Alright, alright, enough sappy stuff!!Get outta here, punk!”Pushing him toward the walkway, he snickered, waving a goodbye as he continued down the sidewalk.

 

Only a few more hours.

The walk to Grillby’s wasn’t far; he’d set up shop on the outskirts of the city, keeping closer to the monsters.Sans hadn’t been stopping there as much since he’d started working there.Or he lied about how long his shifts were.Who could say, really.But either way, it’s been a while since he himself had dropped by.

They hadn’t planned to walk home together, but when he’d seen the time his practice ended aligned perfectly with the end of his brother’s shift, he thought it might be nice!And would actually encourage his brother to walk, for a change.

It was nearly seven already, but you wouldn’t guess it by the pleasant flow of monsters out and about.A few humans were even mingled in.His pace relaxed as he found himself watching the bustle of life around the other stores in the small shopping district.Everyone was so unique, every building the same.He counted the streetlights as he nearly strolled past his destination.

“Heya!Papyrus!”The voice was only somewhat familiar, pulling his attention back in the other direction.A blue bunny monster trotted toward him...the nice cream guy?What was his name again...?

“HOWDY, MR. NICE CREAM GUY!”

His laugh was soft and bubbly as he slowed to a stop before him, “You can call me Vance when I’m not working!”He smiled at him like they’d been friends for years, despite hardly knowing each other, “Do you have a minute?”

“OF COURSE!I HAVE SEVERAL!”Sidestepping out of the way of other pedestrians, he stood proud and smiled brightly, “WHAT CAN I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, ASSIST YOU WITH TODAY?”

He seemed amused as he followed suit, “You and Frisk are friends, right?I always love when you two stop by my stand!But, well,” his cheerful disposition shifted as his ears drooped, “I know their birthday’s coming up, and I wanted to do something for them!I just...don’t really know what that’d be...”

“AND...YOU WANT MY OPINION?”

The bunny monster looked taken aback for a minute, but his upbeat attitude was quick to resurface, “Yeah!Of course!”

“WOWIE!OKAY!!”Bringing a hand to his chin, he tapped his foot thoughtfully as he focused on Frisk.What kind of a gift would they like that wasn’t from him?

“OH!I’VE GOT IT!GET THEM A ROBOTIC DOG WITH A ROCKET LAUNCHER!”

The monster’s eyes were wide for a second, until laughter possessed him.Wiping a tear from his eye, his smile was somehow more joyous than before, “I don’t think I can afford that...but it would be cool!”His nose was very shiny.A very nice shade of red.

Humming reconsideration, he tapped his finger against his chin, “THEN HOW ABOUT...” pointing to the sky, an idea sparked into his mind, “DOING SOMETHING NICE!”

The other monster looked a little confused by the proposition, but didn’t get the chance to ask.

“FRISK LOVES DOING NICE THINGS FOR OTHERS, SO YOU COULD DO NICE THINGS FOR OTHERS FOR THEM!!”

His eyes lit up as it sunk in, “Oh, I get it!That’s a great idea!!”

“papyrus?”

His attention was stolen by the monster a few yards down from them.Making his way closer, the- or uh, _Vance_ , shifted to greet him.

“Heya, Sans!”

“BROTHER!THERE YOU ARE!HOW WAS YOUR SHIFT?”

Offering a lazy grin to the duo, he focused on him, “i thought you were at undyne’s.”His tone was curious, not accusatory.

“I WAS!BUT NOW I’M HERE!MR. VANCE GUY AND I WERE DISCUSSING FRISK!”

Chuckling, his acquaintance amended, “Frisk’s birthday.”Resting a hand on his hip, he looked to Sans, “Papyrus gave me a really great idea!But it’s a surprise, alright?”

“heh, consider my lips sealed.”

“WE DON’T HAVE LIPS, BUT CONSIDER YOUR SECRET SAFE WITH US!”

“Thanks!I guess I should get going...But seriously, Papyrus, you’re the best!I’ll see you two around, okay?”With a sincere smile, the monster waved as he headed back in the direction he’d come from.

“ya hear that, bro, the best.”Coyly smiling at his younger brother, the skeleton started down the pavement as well.

“THEY DON’T CALL ME THE GREAT PAPYRUS FOR NOTHING.THEY BEING ME.”

Warranting a soft chuckle, the shorter monster kept his gaze forward, “everything okay with undyne, oh great one?”

“ABSOLUTELY!WE HAD A LOT OF FUN TODAY!”It was hard to keep pace with his brother, who seemed to be walking even more sluggishly than usual, “HOW WAS WORK?”

“s’alright.grillby’s a good boss, ya know?never gives me more than i can handle.”

Head tilted down, as if he could read his brother’s mind, he walked a little faster.

“so you just...decided to drop by?”

“YES!I THOUGHT WE COULD WALK HOME TOGETHER.”But it was seeming like less of a good idea by the minute.

“heh, thanks, bro.”

They’d made it about four blocks when the older monster started dragging his feet.Was he really so exhausted from a single shift at work?Without asking permission, he reached down and hoisted the other up over his chest, not unlike a toddler.

“YOU KNOW, BROTHER, YOU’D HAVE BETTER STAMINA IF YOU CAME ON OCCASIONAL JOGS WITH ME.” 

Putting up no resistance, Sans’ only sign of defeat was a sigh.

“yeah, yer right.”

The rest of the trip home was silent, his brother falling asleep in almost record time.He’d be lying if he tried to convince himself he wasn’t worried.The older monster didn’t usually seem so tired whenever he got home, and it’s not like he hadn’t worked several jobs before.Perhaps he just hadn’t slept long enough.Of course, he’d been sleeping almost up until he had to head out for his shift.

The memory of a soul, so small and delicate, tugged at his thoughts.Could he actually be doing worse?What could’ve brought on something so dramatic?Could whatever have affected him be affecting his brother?What was happening to them?Was it his fault?

Resting the bone-weary monster onto the couch, he straightened up slowly, worry clouding his judgement.Maybe he shouldn’t go back to the labs tonight.

Maybe...

No.No, that would be...counterproductive.Besides, this wasn’t entirely unusual behavior for his brother.If he remained like this, it would become worrisome.But right now, he very well could’ve just overexerted himself earlier.

He would make dinner, and...wait a little while.He wouldn’t leave until midnight.12 on the dot.No sooner.Hopefully, Sans would wake up by then, and- oh!Maybe he’d just forgotten to eat earlier!That could also be it!

Sighing his resignation, he checked to make sure he’d locked the front door upon their return and headed upstairs to wash off.Jumping to conclusions was pouring gasoline on a fire, so he would just focus on...on the washing up.Focus on cleaning and cooking and...where did he leave that notebook again?He’d find it after he got changed.

Washing his face and his hands, drying them with a towel, finding something more comfortable than sparring clothes - he could wait.He just had to focus on...on just about anything other than the labs.

Or Sans.

Focus on anything....but......

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> =)))  
> Ever notice some similarities with the way the brothers think about each other?  
> :)))


	18. Time and Time Again

  “Oh, and you know what, dear?”A paw like hand wrapped over his shoulder, fishing his attention back from the shops across the street, “I think balloons are in order!”

“BALLOONS SHOULD ALWAYS BE IN ORDER!”

The boss monster at his side smiled warmly to him before releasing her grasp, “This year will be quite acceptable, don’t you think?”

“INDUBITABLY!!BUT I REALLY THINK DEADLY SPIKES WOULD PUSH IT ABOVE AND BEYOND!”

She chuckled as they strolled around the bend, as though he were joking, and began reviewing her list for the seventeenth time.

“I don’t think we can budget for deadly spikes, but I do quite like the idea of a few more modest puzzles, perhaps?I know how much Frisk appreciates your...creativity.”

“INGENUITY IS MY MIDDLE NAME!OR IT WOULD BE IF I HAD ONE!NOW, IF WE’RE EXCLUDING DEADLY SPIKES, I’M PRETTY SURE I STILL HAVE THE ELECTRICAL BOARD FROM THE SHOCK-“

“YO!!!PAPYRUS!!”

Toriel startled at the shout, its caller a small, reptilian monster jumping up and down on the sidewalk opposite them.He’d gotten taller, too, though he was still a little shorter than their shared human friend.

At the first given opportunity, he dashed across the street, forgetting the crosswalk in his excitement.

“DUDE!It’s been forEVER!”Sporting the persimmon scarf he and Frisk had gifted him last year, the child bounced on his heels when he finally reached them, “Like, at least two months!Oh, and hi Frisk’s mom!”

“YES!THAT IS VERY TRUE!I WAS FEELING VERY...UNDER THE WEATHER...” Toriel offered a sympathetic smile, “BUT THE HUMANS ANNUAL BIRTH CELEBRATION IS UPON US!I’M SURE I‘LL SEE YOU THERE!!”

“Yo!You’re seeing me right now, too, though!”

“WOWIE!YOU’RE RIGHT!IT MUST BE A VERY LUCKY DAY FOR ME!”

“Awe, c’mon, dude!You’re the greatest!!I’m the lucky one!!Nyeh heh heh!!!

The goat monster watched them chat, amusement sparkling in her eyes.Monster Kid’s sister, whom he’d abandoned in his haste, eventually made her way over.She seemed less than enthused, but she usually did.And soon the two young monsters were back on their way, leaving them to their planning and shopping. 

A content sigh and a distant look were common on the older monster any time she spoke with Frisk’s younger friends.Perhaps she was thinking of the future.Perhaps she was reliving a memory...who could say?But her wistful eyes watched after them until they were no longer in view.

Adjusting the bags on his left arm, he recaptured her attention when he shuffled slightly.

“WHERE TO NEXT, YOUR ROYAL MOMNESS?”

Her presence returned as she looked past him, “Now seems as good a time as any to get the groceries, don’t you think?”

“YES!A MARVELOUS PLAN!”Following her lead, he walked a little slower, “IT SHOULD BE A PIECE OF CAKE!”It would be the last stop of the trip.

Her laughter was bubbly and sincere, “Truly!As easy as pie!”

Being around her always felt so natural.Like she’d been there his whole life.Looking back now, it seemed odd he hadn’t missed her, despite having not known her!She treated him and his brother likewise, as though they were family.She was good for Sans.And good for him.And good for Frisk.They were all good for each other!

The rest of the trip went quickly, Toriel being well acquainted with the correct locations of the necessary ingredients in the grocery store.He picked up the balloons at the place next door, in the meantime, and the elderly human didn’t even appear to realize he was a monster, only making it go that much faster!They met back up and headed home.

He listened diligently as the goat monster listed off plans for the party, only not remembering about half of them by the time they got to her house.She loved planning get-togethers, and always decorated the backyard so nicely.Him and Sans usually helped - he would decorate the trees while sans opened the decorations and set the table.As lazy as he like to be, he certainly liked doing little things for the boss monster.This year would likely be no exception.

Carefully setting the bags where instructed, he tried not to get distracted by the names of the books resting on the counter.Oh, she was still talking?He smiled and nodded and occasionally interjected with a properly appreciated pun.It was very easy to be around her.

It hardly took any time at all before they’d put everything away.She offered him tea, he declined, and she smiled with that sparkle missing from her eyes and told him, “I suppose I’d better let you get going, then.I didn’t realize how late it had gotten!”Her expression soft, and somewhat contemplative. 

She appreciated peace and quite, but she didn’t like being alone for too long.And as much as he knew it’d be the nice thing to stay a little while longer, his body itched with the will to leave.

He needed to get back to the labs.

“I LOOK FORWARD TO PROVIDING YOU WITH MORE OF MY PARTY PLANNING EXPERTISE!WITH MY HELP, THIS PARTY WILL GO OFF WITHOUT A HITCH!!”

“It always does.”Nodding slowly, her eyes were on him but her focus elsewhere, “Thank you, Papyrus.And tell Sans I wish him well.”

“AYE AYE, SIR!” her chuckle sounded behind him as he turned and hopped off the porch, jauntily strolling down the sidewalk. 

As soon as he was out of sight, and earshot, he started into a jog.To his advantage, their house was closer to the edge of the neighborhood, making it closer to the mountain.The note he’d left about being busy for the day should stave off any suspicion his brother might have, should he take his time.

Despite the monster’s best efforts, he was still quite predictable to his brother.He’d gotten fairly good at reading the older skeleton over the many years, and at any hint the monster was surprised by his busy schedule, he went a few days without a visit.Including the past few.So he was particularly antsy to get back.Even the night visits were risky when his brother grew concerned.Or...skeptical would be a better word.

With his shifts at Grillby’s, and his hot-whatevers stand, Sans’ busier schedule lended convenience to his own.But the shifts were short, and his brother often used working on his own time to check up with his younger sibling.The skeleton could be quite doting at times, yet completely reserved at others.It made sense he was still the latter, after how...distressed his magic had become...But he seemed to be easing back into normalcy, as well.

Mind tied up by thoughts of friends and family, he nearly hadn’t realized he’d almost headed into the Underground from the Ruins.Narrowly catching himself in time, he clipped into the mountain, bounding through until he’d created enough distance between himself and the entry.Guilt swelled in his chest cavity as he free feel down into Waterfall. 

It had been a while, too long, since the last time he’d visited his friend.But.Complications had kept him weary.He had needed time to sort some of this out on his own.Though, with the way things were going, it was starting to feel like that time might be coming to a close.It was almost under control.Almost.

He couldn’t deny the way the orange magic surged and pressured him whenever he was in the labs.It was easy enough to ignore, thanks to the sparring with Undyne, but he knew it wasn’t his imagination...it was still getting stronger.And the longer he spent, the worse it got.As mild as the difference was, he didn’t want to press his luck.He’d have to start using it eventually.But caution urged him to learn more before making any attempt to try.

The research he’d found before the little break...it had consumed near every waking thought he’d had since.Unfortunately, so far, everything he’d discovered was all misdirected from his specific needs.It was mostly comparative.The differences between humans and monsters.And however engrossing it could be at times, he knew it couldn’t help him with this.He needed to figure what to do about magical misalignment. 

If magic was a reflection on its monster, what did that mean for him?And why was it so circumstantial to things he couldn’t piece together?The word bravery had stuck with him since the boss monster had spoken it, but he didn’t feel very brave about much of anything anymore.

In a tentative way, he supposed there was bravery in facing something scary and trying to stop it head on.Even if that thing so happens to be yourself.

Blinking back into reality, the dim lighting of the lab bleached the vibrancy from the yellow paint of the walls.It was eerie upstairs, with no one here.The amount of dust couldn’t compare to what had gathered in the lower levels, but it still managed to add an uneasy presence no one could ignore.He didn’t typically use the main entrance, so he wasn’t as acclimated to the differences yet.Perhaps he might even tidy it a bit on a day he had more time.But that was most definitely not today.

Using his own form of shortcut, he dropped downstairs in an instant, following the halls in a well practiced way.It really wasn’t so convoluted, he’d navigated fairly well since trip one!Or rather, trip two.He tried not to think about trip one.Thankfully, nothing like that had happened again.That...he could remember....

It also seemed that the holes in his memory were becoming larger.Like moths on wool, his attention wore thinner every day.But his capacity for intrigue seemed to be replacing it.Perhaps his forgetfulness was due to the metaphorical space on his metaphorical hard drive being replaced by the newer knowledge he’d accumulated down here.Minds (supposedly) didn’t work like that, though.He was distracted, that was it.These trips were quite important, after all.You can’t remember something you didn’t realize you were doing or hearing in the first place, right?

Of course, that wasn’t exactly a habit to reinforce...but once he found his solution, everything would go back to normal!As a matter of fact, this might even improve his memory!!

Moving, re-stacking, and sorting through boxes, he found the last one he’d been in, marked by a little happy apple sticker from The Frisk Collection he’d started bringing for just that purpose.‘Magic Durability and Sustainability’ seemed to be the topic of the day, and a good potential lead, so, he sat himself on the floor and surrounded himself by half the box’s worth of files and started reading.

Reading, then reviewing.Outlines would quickly fill several pages from his notebook, several sections and important points already slipping from his thoughts.As always, he would need to reread them a few times to get it to stick, but it would.It always did.

An underlying tone was heavily prevalent throughout the documents.One he’d never really given much thought to before.It was hinted at so casually and frequently...the feeling the author had quite a lot of experience with it washed over him as every word sunk it.

Apparently, genetic augmentation wasn’t out of the realm of monster medical science.While incredibly delicate, monster souls were...somewhat stronger than the author had previously considered.Or at least, they could be.Magic was the true powerhouse of the soul.It’s makeup different from the body.Fragmented research of the affects fusing with a human soul had proved there was something inherently potent about the magic that formed a monsters’ soul.

Lots of testing was required, but they’d never tested on a monster’s soul itself, it seemed.Understandable, given the possible outcomes.But one hypothesis stood out more than the rest, complicating his thought process further.Something along the lines of developing a monster’s soul to the point of being strong enough for such a task as experimentation.

It was...frightening to imagine what had brought the monster who’d thought about these things to his conclusion.But as much as he willed the thoughts away, they still drifted back to the memory of his brother’s soul.

Monsters were...delicate.Malleable.Unstable.

It was becoming clear that, above all else, monsters were very....very......

Weak.

 

 

Sliding one box off of another, he waved the dust away from his face, a cough buzzing in the back of his throat.His soul skipped a beat when he tipped the lid back to reveal more blueprints.Precisely what he’d been hoping for.

A separate machine than the last he’d found plans for, one he recognized.One that existed.

Carrying his find back to the others in the next room over, he only made it halfway before his left leg buckled beneath him.It took a minute to process what had happened, dizzy as he knelt on the ground, staring at the papers now sprawled across the hallway floor.

Pulling.Something pulled him backwards.On his hands and knees, he watched as the hall stilled and his pulse raced and he suddenly felt like he was going to be sick.Fear prickled along the back of his neck, an awful, foreboding presence behind him, crawling up his spine.

Blinking, the sensations passed almost as quickly as they’d developed.But that didn’t stop his shoulders from shaking as he tried to push himself back to his feet.His legs refused, numb from frightful anticipation, and sitting upright ended up being all he could manage.

Impatience replaced the fear before long, and he grew frustrated.But he could reach the mess of files from here, and figured it made no difference where he examined them, flicking through the closest one.He didn’t know what ‘TRT:’ meant, but it appeared everywhere in these pages, always followed by something else.What an odd looking machine. 

It...almost looked like.....

 

 

A bright sound echoed around him.His phone sang out as he fumbled with his research to find it, pleased to see a familiar name on the screen.

“HELLO, UNDYNE!!”

“PAPYRUS!!!WHERE THE HECK ARE YOU??”

A bolt of panic shook him.Was it Saturday?No, it-

“Sans said you’d be back soon, but it’s been like, almost an hour!!!The popcorns cold!”

They’d planned a movie night.And he’d completely forgotten.Shit.

“...YES!!!I’LL BE BACK SHORTLY!I JUST GOT A LITTLE...TRIPPED UP...!”

The silence on the other end of the receiver was louder than her yelling.

“...You totally forgot, didn’t you?”

“NO!I’M JUST...VERY DISTRACTIBLE!!”

A much shorter hesitation was followed by a sigh.

“Alright, then HURRY UP!!!Frisk’s already falling asleep!”

He could hear the laughter in her tone, and brief shuffling.Frisk had probably argued, earning themself a noogie.

“HURRY UP!!”Click.

With a heavy sigh, he pushed himself to his feet, using the wall for support.His stiff legs protested, so he leaned back, rubbing his tired eyes behind his glasses.Readjusting them, he examined the mess he’d made this time.Glancing down to the device still in hand, it claimed six hours had passed.Close to seven including travel time.

The hallway’s temperature seemed to plummet as a chill settled over his bones.He could only remember somewhere around half that time.He was still doing something wrong, he could feel it in his chest.There was still something he was missing.

Resolving to work a new plan out later, he gathered the papers closer to their box with his feet, shoveling the whole ordeal closer to the wall before forgoing the correct process and heading back up to the ground floor.

‘TRT Extractor’.The handwriting on the papers had been messier than usual, much of it even crossed out.They looked more like his own notes than the usual, almost printed looking additions from the scientist.An uneasy feeling lent itself to this particular project, one that almost stole him back from the present.But he needed to return or the others would get worried.He’d undo all the progress he’d made the past few weeks.Weeks.

Had it been a month already?

Frisk’s birthday was coming up soon!Had he gotten them a present yet!?No, he should make one!Like, a particularly convoluted and pointless puzzle!!Or something they could actually use...He rattled off a list to himself as he started into a jog.Which ended up a sprint by the time he was back out of the mountain.He’d think of something, he was sure of it.

Right now, he just needed to get back.And get as far away from the labs as possible.He’d worry about that later.Right now, he needed to get back.

 

The pitch night sky was disrupted by deep shades of green and gray and blue.All the trees and rocks and thoughts that wouldn’t leave him bled together as he tore back toward civilization.He hadn’t even realized it was raining until he saw the shine of the pavement as he sailed back down to the surface and started slowing.Keeping up a more sustainable run, he hardly even paid attention as familiarity guided him back to his house.

He stopped curtly, letting the light rain patter against his skull as he heaved for air that felt like he couldn’t get enough of.Had he pushed himself too hard?No.Everything slanted, lightheadedness arguing the opposite, and he stumbled to a telephone pole for security.

A few minutes worked wonders as he caught his breath and balance, starting back into a light jog until he reached the porch of their home.

47 minutes, a new record.

Parading inside without hesitation, he could only remove his soggy jacket before a long, heavy arm wrapped around his shoulders.Flinching at the surprise greeting, he quickly recognized its owner’s voice.

“ _Darling_!There you are!We’ve been waiting~” retracting the mechanical arm to a normal length, the boxy robot pulled him into a side hug.

“M-mettaton, at least let him take his shoes off!”Alphys followed shortly behind, chuckling at her friend.

“I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE HERE, TOO!!IT’S ALWAYS AN HONOR TO BE GREETED BY THE FABULOUS-“

The shattering of something glass abruptly interrupted the three of them, followed by a more tame crash from the next room over.

“SORRY!”

The smallish scientist sighed her exasperation before turning to the doorway and checking on her girlfriend.

“IT’S OKAY IT WAS A LAMP!!FRISK IS OKAY!!!”

“IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU’RE HAVING A LOT OF FUN ALREADY!”

“Oh, please, my dear, the party doesn’t start until you arrive!”He could feel every segment of the arm move and adjust naturally, guiding him as they walked, “Well, at least when I’m not here.”His laughter was airy and bright, the lights on his display dancing with his amusement.

“Now, go get rid of these bland clothes, darling, put on something  _daring_ .We have a party to get back to!”

“pretty sure he means pajamas.”

His grip had been easing until being startled by the shorter skeleton appearing on his opposite side, “SANS!How many times-“

“hey, bro.how’d the errands go?”

Huffing his frustration, the exuberant host crossed his arms and head back to whichever room the others were in.

“THEY WENT.HOW WAS WORK?”

Shrugging, his brother started up the stairs, “work-ish.”He followed closely to his bedroom, flicking on the light his brother had been too lazy to bother with.

Hopping onto the bed while he headed for his dresser, he could hear the other shifting, “the kid was really excited to see you, when they got here.you promise ‘em something?”

Excited..?

Peaking over his shoulder, he found the older skeleton had tucked himself under the comforter, watching him with half lidded eyes.

“REALLY??”Clearing his throat, he straightened up with his loungewear draped over his shoulder, “WELL, I MEAN, WHO WOULDN’T BE EXCITED TO SEE ME!!!”

“hmm,” rolling onto his back, the skeleton watched the light fixture, “no one i wanna know.”

The wet clothes slapped against the hamper lid as he discarded them on his way out, “AT LEAST FALL ASLEEP ON THE COUCH!WE HAVE COMPANY!!”

A loud fake snore took the last of his patience, summoning the slightest hint of blue magic to flip the sheets up and over his brother’s face.But it garnered no reaction, so he conceded, heading back downstairs.He knew very well Sans would be-

“what took ya so long?”An intensely smug grin was spread across the skeleton’s face as he stood just out of sight of the other’s in the hallway.

“I HAD AN ANNOYANCE TO TAKE CARE OF IN MY BEDROOM.”Allowing just enough pause for a flicker of doubt to show in his brother’s eyes, “RAIN SOAKED CLOTHES ARE JUST THE WORST!!” His beaming smile perfectly countered the sarcastic one from the short monster as he walked past him to join the others.

“PAPYRUS!C’MERE!”

‘We already picked a movie!You’ll really like it!’

“It’s a romance~!An epic for the ages!”

“It is n-not!”

“No is DEFINITELY is!!”

“Don’t encourage him!”

The group clambered pleasantly, getting settled for the show.Frisk already had the movie primed in the DVD player, motioning for him to follow as they made their way back to the couch.Toriel was there, too, in a chair moved beside the couch, leaning against it, dozing prematurely.Sans had found a spot along the back, like an uncouth cat, laying so his head was closer to hers.Undyne claimed his side as her personal headrest.

Between her and Mettaton was a perfectly Papyrus shaped spot that he happily took, minding his arms as Frisk climbed up to sandwich themself half between, half in the laps of him and his finned companion.

Any specific sentences or words were lost to the several ongoing conversations.But he liked the noise.It muffled what was in his head quite nicely, leaving just enough room for him to take in the scene and breathe.He didn’t pay attention to the movie, but he usually didn’t.Even on the rare occasions he could.The small space in his mind they’d made was filled instead by thoughts of them and their opinions of the film.It was a lively scene, that was true.But that didn’t deter the punsters from falling asleep 10 minutes in.Barring the occasional (unnecessary) interruption from Sans.

The night moved faster than he had on his return trip, and once everyone had inevitably fallen asleep, the silence pulled the cotton from skull piece by piece until he was drowned out by himself once again.

In sharp contrast, that time crawled, leaving him unaware of what hour it was getting to be at any given moment.He’d become a pillow for most of those on the couch, as the middle seat often did, forcing him to sit stationary for hours.Which wouldn’t be so bad (he had a lot of practice), were it not also for the fact he could feel his magic prickling just under the surface again already.

It was Friday.

Or rather, had been.Training would be later today.He had to be patient.He wished his magic would understand that.What had prompted the otherwise unwarranted upsurge?Had his excitement at spending time with his friends been his downfall?Or had it been sparked by his surprise earlier?Had he spent too long in the labs that week?

No!He’d only...he’d barely gone.Because of Sans...that couldn’t...

Static filled his head, the numb buzz in his mouth spreading down his throat and electrifying his rib cage.

He needed to move.

He needed to move _now_.

Shifting his arms, he tried his damnedest to slide himself out under the others without disturbance.Which...wasn’t exactly realistic.But he continued.Maneuvering, shifting, and ultimately freeing himself, nothing more that a few flickering eyelids and disgruntled mumbling was left in his wake.A job well done, as far as he was concerned.But should Undyne’s head really be at that angle?

Easing the monster into a less contorted position, he sighed his relief.She was a deep sleeper, thankfully.He would check on them later, but right now, he needed...

What did he need?

Mind catching up to his body, he found himself headed toward his room.But he didn’t stop there.Sliding the window on the far wall up with as much delicacy as he could muster, he climbed out into the tree beside it.With practiced care, he found his leverage and hoisted himself onto the roof.

The moon gazed upon him, no longer obstructed by clouds encumbered with rain.Not yet full, but round enough to marvel at the shadows over the craters, and other oddities he’d never noticed before.It reminded him of the ceiling in his room.

The humid summer night hummed through his skull, providing a similar ease of distraction as his friends.It was so different from the eery snowy hush of Snowdin.

Creaking pulled his eyes from the stars, the real stars, as he noticed a rather small set of hands appear on the edge of the roof.A face soon followed, his dearest human companion using the same method he had to finagle themself up to him.They moved deftly, otherwise, sitting beside him in comfortable silence.Unfortunately, one that wouldn’t last.

‘Are you okay?’He’d already instinctively looked to them as they started gesturing.

“YES!OF COURSE!I JUST THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE TO...APPRECIATE THE GREAT OUTDOORS.AN APTLY NAMED PLACE FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS!”

‘Okay.’

They watched the sky for another few minutes, but the peace in his head was replaced by a growing apprehension.Their thoughts and words unsigned hung in the air around them, until they started again.

‘You really are great, Papyrus.’Their smile was sympathetic, ‘but, if you ever wanna talk about...’ why did that make him...angry?‘Maybe not always feeling great...I’m a good listener.’

His face held a smile, whether he meant for it to or not, as he contemplated walking off the roof right then and there.

‘I’m...also pretty good at keeping secrets.’

He’d been here before.They’d been here before.This was where Frisk had confessed the truth about their shared flowery friend.How long ago had that been?What was twisting him up so terribly?

His own magic pressuring him like a pipe, ready to burst, this respite had turned into an interrogation.

“Frisk.”

Looking back to him, he could feel the shock radiating from their soul as they fell back slightly.

No, it wasn’t still raining, was it.

Magic streamed gently from his right eye, not unlike tears, trailing down his face until they dropped down onto his hand, onto the roof.

“I’m sorry.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> /please/ reread the tags...

**Author's Note:**

> askglaspyrus.tumblr.com  
> Got any questions rattling around that skull of yours? Feel free to stop by and ask any of the crew!


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